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jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash

0 posted 2000-01-26 04:50 PM


No antidote is known to counteract
The venom painted on each dreaded dart
That burns the blood of each stout, stalwart heart
Of mighty men of lore.   A doubtless fact,
Your thoughtless acts caused Paris to attract
The Firebrand’s kin to teach great Troy the art
Of waging bloody war.  Those deaths impart
A somber weight on doughty Atlas’ back.
You poison noble blood and plunge great men
To greater disrepute.  Your deadly rain
Of arrows falls like hailstones from above
To flatten men like stalks of wheat, found when
And where there’s sorrow, misery, and pain,
Sad proof there is no greater foe than Love.


< !signature-->

 Jim

"If I rest, I rust."  - Martin Luther



[This message has been edited by jbouder (edited 01-26-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Jim Bouder - All Rights Reserved
Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
1 posted 2000-01-26 05:10 PM


Please don't expect me to say anything about 'personification' ! I just don't get it LOL.
But what I read here....I like, I like, I like !  

Poertree
Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359
UK
2 posted 2000-01-26 06:51 PM


ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG even here in this hallowed place of learning there is no escape ..... another SONNETTTTT ...... running screaming from the classroom >>>>>>

Not bad though not bad at all (said in an American voice ..lol).  As to the personification of Love I'd be interested to hear what our teacher has to say, because although you address Love as "you" no clear picture of Love in humanoid form is painted.  With zero experience of these things I'm sure that I will be quite wrong in this, but I just thought that it might have been nice to see who/what was actually hurling the darts and deadly rain ...

over to you My Lady K ...  

Philip

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
3 posted 2000-01-26 07:21 PM


*Jim chases Philip out the door >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> and tackles him*

Slow down you senile old man!  Philip wrote:

"My understanding is that Personification occurs when a poem addresses an inanimate or abstract object as if it were a person ..."

and

"Whereas Anthropomorphism endows non-human objects with human physical and emotional qualities ..."

By your very own words (spoken with a snotty, English professor's accent), I have written a personification.  Besides, everyone knows Cupid wears a diaper and has little angel wings.  Geeze, Philip, don't you have Valentine's Day in England?  

And I thank you!  I thank you!  I thank you! Munda.  

P.S.  BTW, Philip, Americans don't have accents (unless they are from the South).  Everybody else does.  

< !signature-->

 Jim

"If I rest, I rust."  - Martin Luther



[This message has been edited by jbouder (edited 01-26-2000).]

Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906
Sitting in Michael's Lap
4 posted 2000-01-27 12:33 PM


An' exactly whutt, mah deah Jim, were you sayin' about us suthenuhs..?  Ah do buhlieve that you have picked the WRONG side of th' Mason-Dixon tuh be toyin' with, mah friend ...  

OK, as to this poem ... hehehe ... Philip, I must both disagree and agree with you ... he DID write a personification (disagreeing), so you WERE wrong about that (agreeing).  And, unless I am unaware of a new form ala Jim, this is also not a sonnet (wrong again!  LOL), for it is missing its finishing couplet.      He snaked in some sestet in the end there -- he's clinically insane, who knows..?  Either way, much as it pains me to do so after he so callously insulted mah suthen heritage, he did rather an excellent job with his assignment.      No anthropomorphism, but quite a vivid one-sided dialogue with love describing his decidedly humanoid exploits.

Oh, and BTW Jim -- Cupid isn't a baby, he's a hottie -- haven't you ever seen the sculpture "Cupid and Psyche..?"    

--Kess

< !signature-->

 Full fathom five thy father lies,
Of his bones are coral made,
Those are pearls that were his eyes;
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange...


--William Shakespeare, from The Tempest



[This message has been edited by Skyfyre (edited 01-27-2000).]

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
5 posted 2000-01-27 06:34 AM


Kess:

"Oh, and BTW Jim -- Cupid isn't a baby, he's a hottie -- haven't you ever seen the sculpture "Cupid and Psyche..?"

Sorry, I must have been paying attention to Psyche.  

OK, as to this poem ... hehehe ... Kess, I must both agree and disagree with you ... I DID write a personification (agreeing), so you WERE right about that (agreeing).  And, unless I am unaware of the disappearance of the oldest sonnet form from history, this is also a Petrarchan/Italian sonnet (wrong! LOL), I snaked in some sestet that the Italian sonnet calls for in the end for it to read: abbaabba/cdecde -- I know I'm clinically insane, so who knows?  

And Jeeeum takes uh bow fer outsmartin' uhnudder one uh dose sudderners, OOOOOO-DOGGEES!!!  

Thanks for the high marks, teach.


 Jim

"If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther


hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
6 posted 2000-01-27 09:29 AM


Can I sit next to you in the next class? Philip has been no help at all, heck, he doesn't even have his own assignment done let alone help with mine.
Nicely done Jim...and what are you calling this type of poem??

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
7 posted 2000-01-27 09:46 AM


Ruth:

This is a love sonnet, Ruth, couldn't you tell?    Get your notebook out from Nan's class on sonnets ... okay ... so you were talking and didn't take notes ... you can use mine.  This is an Italian or Petrarchan Sonnet.  It has a rhyme scheme of abbaabba/cdecde (usually) but there are some variations to the sestet's rhyme scheme.  It is the oldest of the sonnet formats and, while it has a tighter rhyme scheme, it gives more time for resolving the conflict (six lines/sestet) than given by the Shakespearean and Spenserian sonnets (two lines/couplet).

If you meant "What kind?" personification/anthropomorphism, this is a personification.

You may sit next to me whenever you want.  I take careful, copious notes and can guaranty you an "A" if you join my study group.    Thanks.

Jim

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

8 posted 2000-01-27 09:59 AM


Jim, you sure know how to sing a sonnet! Always a pleasure!

Denise

Poertree
Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359
UK
9 posted 2000-01-27 03:06 PM


Heyyyyy wait one moment Ruth it's you what's meant to be helping me ... (hauling you back) you wrote yours days ago .. c'mere and help me with the final couplet he heh .. As for sittin next to Jim lad hummpphh .. I forbid it! He has enough help already from teacher ... favouritism it is ... blatant favouritism ..  

.. I'll be back ...

Philip

PS  I was right about the sonnet though Kess  

[This message has been edited by Poertree (edited 01-27-2000).]

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
10 posted 2000-01-27 05:57 PM


Most humble appologies Jim...I only counted 12 lines, my mistake. Yes, thought you were leaving out a few lines there. I do know the Italian sonnet.

Philip...get a move on it buddy. Hey, let me see what you have there....hmmmm....first time I ever saw love being refered to as a dog. Interesting twist you have there

Poertree
Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359
UK
11 posted 2000-01-27 06:26 PM


Ok Jim .. I hold my hand up on this one. Having read Kess's comments and checked my faithful tome it would appear that I have let my enthusiasm for a dig at me ole mate JB cloud my erstwhile impeccable judgement .. alas alack I am undone ...

Yours in penitence (for now .. )

Ruth

You need glasses .. It says LAWYER .. (you don't believe me do you Jim ..lol, one difference is that one has three letters and the other six .. now what are the others ..hmmmm ??   ....  Stick around for another 24 hours and i promise ...  

Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906
Sitting in Michael's Lap
12 posted 2000-01-27 11:14 PM


I stand corrected.  

But of course, now, you know I must wreak my revenge upon you by picking on YOUR meter -- LOL.

Line three is great up until "each stout, stalwart"  I might suggest "every stalwart," but I have faith that you can come up with something eminently more creative than that.  

Also feel compelled to mention that the line "You poison noble blood and plunge great men
/To greater disrepute" is positively brilliant -- my favorite by far.  

--Kess




 Full fathom five thy father lies,
Of his bones are coral made,
Those are pearls that were his eyes;
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange...


--William Shakespeare, from The Tempest


Not A Poet
Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA
13 posted 2000-01-28 11:45 AM


Hi Jim,

Sorry I'm so slow. I've commented on this on in the CA. I said I didn't like it as much as  some of your others but it is still quite good. I know this slightly less than enthusiastic comment will not bother you as you know I am a great fan of your writing.

It is an unusual approach to personification of love, as I understand it, but does fulfill that goal very well.

Thanks.
< !signature-->

 Pete

     What terms shall I find sufficiently simple in their sublimity --
     sufficiently sublime in their simplicity --
     for the mere enunciation of my theme?
          Edgar Allan Poe




[This message has been edited by Not A Poet (edited 01-28-2000).]

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