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Passions in Poetry

Dear Mother and Father.

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chic
Member
since 01-26-2000
Posts 255
yellville, Ar, U.S.


0 posted 02-07-2000 10:30 AM       View Profile for chic   Email chic   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for chic

<font face="Arial, Arial, Verdana" color="#871f78" size="2">
This is a poem that was inspired by Salooma and kari's poems.

I have tried
and yet I fail.
I've done everything
everything but wail.

My older sister
you want me to be.
Can't you see
she is not me.

I can't do it
tis not easy.
For as most can see
you keep me busy.

Clean the house
Put YOUR shoes on.
What will you do
when I am gone.

I can't take it
it makes me tired.
For only in the morning
am I ever wired.

When i get home
is when u start.
You say I am slow
and not very smart.

Where's the thank you's
the tenderness and care.
Where's the love
that you and my sister share.

I feel as not
apart of this family.
I begin to wonder
will anyone love me.

I wish I were a daughter
and not a slave to be used.
I want to be loved
not emotionally abused.

Can't you see
this is me.
Can't you love
who i want to be?

I will love you
my parents you are.
But your love for me
will forever be afar.

</font>



[This message has been edited by chic (edited 02-09-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Barbara Mendoza - All Rights Reserved
sweetcollege_girl
Senior Member
since 12-03-1999
Posts 932
just about where I want to be


1 posted 02-07-2000 11:54 AM       View Profile for sweetcollege_girl   Email sweetcollege_girl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for sweetcollege_girl

Great poem sis...you hit the nail right on the head! Dad is always talking about connie, and "Why can't you be like her?" etc. why can't we be daughters instead of slaves??? I wish he could see what he is doing is wrong..    wishful thinking huh? *sigh*

~~Lavada~

p.s. i liked the poem....

 "For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see it.
For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to here it
For every love, there is a heart somewhere to receive it".--Ivan Panin
Crystalina123
Member
since 01-31-2000
Posts 229


2 posted 02-07-2000 04:24 PM       View Profile for Crystalina123   Email Crystalina123   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Crystalina123

I really like the poem, though I don't have a suggestion for the title, though I completely identify with it!

 "The worst of what people do to one another is deceive.
Because when you love someone you control their version
of reality. If you lie to them that's like making them
autistic so that what they believe is reality is in fact,
not their true situation at all.
Salooma
Senior Member
since 01-28-2000
Posts 803


3 posted 02-07-2000 04:28 PM       View Profile for Salooma   Email Salooma   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Salooma

Great poem chic.....I have an older sister as well and know exactly how you feel. It's hard trying to live up to their expectations and when you get tired of it and try living up to your own expectations they can't accept you for who you've become. Life's defianatly a beach(sorry about that) and there is nothing you can do about it.

Salma  

[This message has been edited by Jer (edited 02-07-2000).]
Corazon
Senior Member
since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


4 posted 02-08-2000 10:06 AM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

well I never felt like this as a daughter, but as a wife yes, really good job of putting your feelings to words....and for a title, if it was me I would simply title it "can't you see?"
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 01-18-2000
Posts 24152
with you


5 posted 02-08-2000 12:55 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Chic, you poor baby! Oh you broke my heart! I'm so sorry your parents' are too blind to see you for who you are, a very sweet girl. I have two step daughter's and they are the light's of my life right along with my son. I hope you know it's not your fault, and it won't last forever, you'll be gone before you know it.   -SEA
Salooma
Senior Member
since 01-28-2000
Posts 803


6 posted 02-08-2000 04:17 PM       View Profile for Salooma   Email Salooma   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Salooma

Thanks Jer....I was hoping that didn't ofend anyone.

Salma
Mistikman
Senior Member
since 01-10-2000
Posts 729
San Jose, CA, USA


7 posted 02-08-2000 06:15 PM       View Profile for Mistikman   Email Mistikman   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mistikman

Ahhhh, family problems, I know thee well. In my case, I have to live in my sisters shadow, with no hopes of ever filling it, no matter how much better than her I ever do. How about "Dear Mother and Father" as the title?

 I am not a poet, I am merely one who speaks in emotion
HelmutB
Senior Member
since 01-06-2000
Posts 989
Canada


8 posted 02-08-2000 07:44 PM       View Profile for HelmutB   Email HelmutB   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit HelmutB's Home Page   View IP for HelmutB

To name this poem is certainly not easy
Well done how you presented your feelings
Perhaps may I suggest
"Love wanted"
"Take me as I am"
"What must I do"
There are so many that come to mind
I liked the poem


 The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools.

Majestic
Member
since 01-11-2000
Posts 269
houston, tx.


9 posted 02-08-2000 09:47 PM       View Profile for Majestic   Email Majestic   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Majestic

hum,..how about "Love me as I am"

Great job of expressing your feelings...Sooner or later they'll see you for who you are...

It's sad that you should live in a shadow..but stick to yours guns and be yourself..

 "To live is to love; To truly LOVE is to live!" ~kg~


chic
Member
since 01-26-2000
Posts 255
yellville, Ar, U.S.


10 posted 02-09-2000 09:34 AM       View Profile for chic   Email chic   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for chic

Attention one and all I have decided on a title and the winner is...


DEAR MOTHER AND FATHER!!!!


 To be or not to be...that is the question.
rachella
Junior Member
since 02-10-2000
Posts 39
Indiana


11 posted 02-10-2000 10:13 PM       View Profile for rachella   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for rachella

Thank you.  I really understand this poem.  It isn't easy, especially when you really love them and you really love your sister. How can you tell them when you don't want to hurt them? It's hard.  Thank you.
Jer
Member
since 12-02-1999
Posts 455
USA


12 posted 02-11-2000 06:21 PM       View Profile for Jer   Email Jer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jer

Interesting! I know not what you speak of in this poem but, I know someone you should talk to about this. LoveBug is in if not the same situation something simmilar to it. she wrote about it and posted a poem about 3 weeks ago. Ask her about it. I know she loves to talk!

 "WRITING IS EASY. ALL YOU DO IS STARE AT A BLANK SHEET OF PAPER UNTIL DROPS OF BLOOD FORM ON YOUR FOREHEAD." Gene Fowler
Ender
Member
since 12-08-1999
Posts 246
Yuma, AZ USA


13 posted 02-11-2000 07:35 PM       View Profile for Ender   Email Ender   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ender's Home Page   View IP for Ender

I know this situation all to well.  I wish i didnt, but i do.  This poem very well states what is felt during those times.  keep up the great poetry writing.
-Ender
chic
Member
since 01-26-2000
Posts 255
yellville, Ar, U.S.


14 posted 09-25-2000 12:28 PM       View Profile for chic   Email chic   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for chic

Thanx guys!! This may sound conceited but I kinda thought me and sis were the only ones in this perdicament, but now I know better don't I? Well thanx for the replies.

"Life is a game and we have to play, but in the end...we all die."-by me!
chic
Member
since 01-26-2000
Posts 255
yellville, Ar, U.S.


15 posted 11-29-2000 12:37 PM       View Profile for chic   Email chic   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for chic

*bump*

"Life is a game and we have to play, but in the end...we all die."-by me!
dreamy_eyes
Member
since 06-17-2000
Posts 82


16 posted 11-29-2000 03:12 PM       View Profile for dreamy_eyes   Email dreamy_eyes   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for dreamy_eyes

Yeah I've been where you are right now.  I hate trying to live upto my sisters expectations and never quite managing to achieve this.  Hopefully they will see you for who you are! Great poem.

Love Deb xxx
Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 09-16-2007
Posts 8075
Realm of Supernatural


17 posted 11-15-2007 07:45 PM       View Profile for Artic Wind   Email Artic Wind   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Artic Wind

Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND
~frustrated writer~
Member
since 02-25-2008
Posts 85


18 posted 02-28-2008 10:52 AM       View Profile for ~frustrated writer~   Email ~frustrated writer~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ~frustrated writer~

sooner or later, they would realize that you're far greater than your sister.
that there's more to you than what they always thought.
they just have to give you time and let you show what you've got.
despite of that compares you got, i'm very sure that your parents are proud of you.
cares for you.
loves you.
perhaps, you didn't see it because your heart is filled with so much hatred. is hatred the right term to use?

**LiRa**

 
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