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Teen Poetry #2
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Star Fairy 2
Member
since 1999-09-06
Posts 260
cerritos, california, usa

0 posted 2000-01-15 02:12 PM


Catch the eyes of my mind
press rewind to the times
When I had fallen
and was deeply entwined
with the heart of a man
and I still fail to understand
when our bonds became weak
and harsh tongues began to speak
dirty secrets began to leak
and he began to seek
for another
to heal his heart
and in his quest we had to part
and I was left broken
totin’
my heart in a sling
randomly finding the nearest fling
attracted to the bandaid he’d bring
but bandaids were no help on those lacerations
143 stitches to build up my concentration
on that happiness
independence
contenment
with me
to be
the beat at something
anything
to avoid more than just my demise
to be so happy that I'm high
and you could see it in my eyes….



 Don't Fall.. Rise in Love
-------823-------


© Copyright 2000 Rakhee - All Rights Reserved
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
1 posted 2000-01-15 10:46 PM


Very powerful, you words say a lot.  Wonderful work.  

 *Krista Knutson*

~*Like a lion, without fear of the howling pack,
Like a gust of wind, ne'er trapped in a snare,
Like a lotus blossom, ne'er sprinkled by water,
Let me, like a unicorn, in solitude roam.*~ Hymn Of Buddha


Astraea
Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 378
California! Yeah! Okay, I'm done now
2 posted 2000-01-15 11:13 PM


I agree with Alwye.  Very lovely.

~Astraea

 "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness."

"Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things."


Jer
Member
since 1999-12-02
Posts 443
USA
3 posted 2000-01-15 11:28 PM


Hey.....  I have to say Star Fairy this is one of your best yet.  I love the description and the whole thought process of rewinding life and bad times.  I have thought about this a lot but,  you have captured it in the right essence. Awesome job.
nicnac8
Junior Member
since 1999-07-28
Posts 46
New York, N.Y. USA
4 posted 2000-01-16 01:41 AM


Beautiful! that was very powerful, at the same time it was pretty depressing. But i definitely liked it. Keep up the good work.


"It is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all."

"All hearts are broken,beware those who never pick up the pieces."

~nicnac8

Star Fairy 2
Member
since 1999-09-06
Posts 260
cerritos, california, usa
5 posted 2000-01-16 05:30 PM


Thank you so much for taking the time and reading my work, I very much appreciate your comments... and i would also like to say im sorry for the multiple posts, i realize after Marilyn's post, how frustrating it must be... so Thank You..

 Don't Fall.. Rise in Love
-------823-------


Jer
Member
since 1999-12-02
Posts 443
USA
6 posted 2000-01-16 05:54 PM


Thats ok....  I brought the problem up to Marilyn because I have only a limmited time to reply and there are to many people posting thier own work and not commenting on others.
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