Moving On (replies welcome)

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Teen Poetry #2

Moving On (replies welcome)

Isabelle
Member

since 1999-08-25

Posts 176
Indiana

0 posted 1999-12-11 11:05 PM

Cool breeze blows
Autumn leaves fall
Her hair blows around her
Sun coming up over the trees
Highlighting her silhoette

Never wanting to leave
Afraid of whats ahead
Feels as if the wall are closing in
Mentality leaving her
Never wanting to let go

Got to move on
Kiss goodbye the past
Welcome the future
Throw away the memories

The best thing of her future
May be left behind
A broken hear is close at hand
Wanting, yearning for him
Can't turn away

Has to find a way to survive
Without his smile
A touch so warm
A voice so comforting
Has to continue living

Got to move on
Kiss goodbye the past
Welcome the future
Throw away the memories

Maybe she'll end of stronger
Maybe weakeer
Make changes to life
Not think of the past
Got to move on

Keep on going
Don't look back
Gonna make it through
Made it many times before
Once more isn't any different

Kiss goodbye the past
Welcome the future
Throw away the memories
Keep moving on

Let herself be free
Spread her wings and fly
Aiming for the burning sun
Keep moving away up high
It's a long way to go

Star Fairy 2
Member

since 1999-09-06

Posts 260
cerritos, california, usa

1 posted 1999-12-12 05:45 PM

keep your head up my dear... moving on is the hardest thing to do.. but it has to be the most beneficial

Don't Fall.. Rise in Love
-------823-------

poetry_kills
Senior Member

since 1999-12-04

Posts 549
new orleans

2 posted 1999-12-12 06:11 PM

i like this poem... perhaps the best "lost love" poem that i've read on this forum to date... my only suggestion is perhaps rethinking some of the cliche phrases used (ie -- "keep moving on", "spread her wings and fly")... some varying word choice and structure can do wonders for a poem... just a suggestion, of course... i think you have a wonderful potential as a poet and hope to read more of your work on the forum soon...

sincerely,
**jerome the boy with no brain

starboards
Member

since 1999-10-14

Posts 467
longwood, florida

3 posted 1999-12-13 09:24 AM

Moving on is a good idea isa! Believe me...things will get better

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