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Misunderstandings
| Teen Poetry #2 |
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Misunderstandings |
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HCwildchild Member
since 1999-09-03
Posts 55Pennsylvania,USA |
Misunderstandings are tough to get by. I sit here confused and I start to cry. I've hurt you my darling, but I never meant to. Lets not let a stupid thing tear us in two. If your love for me is truly real, Then we will be able to see past this ordeal. So if this little thing causes you to leave me, I guess our love was never meant to be. So please my honey, think it all through. I know in your heart you know what is true. Lets understand eachother, and try not to fight, And everything is going to be all right. ------------------ Heather C. |
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| © Copyright 1999 HCwildchild - All Rights Reserved | |||
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roxane Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 505us |
don't take my cricism as a personal affront, but what is this poem about?? you had a misunderstanding? about what? that is what the reader wants to know. the poem is simple, it lacks depth, it offends no one, but what is it to you? that is the most important question as it is your poem. from what i can see, there was a misunderstanding between you and your boyfriend, and now you fear you'll lose him. let me relate something to you, whenever my significant other and i get into fights, the thing that enrages me the most is his total lack of passion. i am a very passionate person, whether fighting, talking, anything. this poem lacks passion, too. if you love this guy, through this poem, entreat him to think about what he is doing. the voice of this poem is calm, rational, apathetic. why? what was the misunderstanding? where is the passion? i do however think that the title was a good idea, a lot better than some that i've seen. like i said, my only problem is how did you hurt him? good luck with it. |
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HCwildchild Member
since 1999-09-03
Posts 55Pennsylvania,USA |
Thankyou for showing me where I went wrong in this poem. Yes, it is a simple one, and yeah, you could say it lacks depth, and maybe needs more passion. This poem was just me trying to sort things out in my own head though, it was written as a way to calm myself down, so yeah it was calm, rational and apathetic!, I don't necessarily want to share what that misunderstanding was with the world, and I don't know how I would fit that in the poem anyway hehe. Its just a poem anyway, if it lacks passion for someone I can't help that, but it worked for me. ------------------ Heather C. |
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Laura Mitchell Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 76Cincinnati OH,45238 |
Nice Job! I think I see what you're trying to say. Did you have a rift in your relationship, and don't want anything to go wrong if he takes you back? |
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