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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


0 posted 10-27-1999 08:34 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Toerag

Mike Tyson left the bar,
He'd won another fight,
He couldn't find his car,
So he stole one just for spite.

He'd had too much to drink,
His tongue was thick and swollen,
Blue lights in his mirror did blink,
He was drunk, the car was stolen.

Now Tyson's not too intelligent,
That's known by several folks,
Most of his reputation,
Is told in silly jokes.

The cop asked him for his license,
Mike said; "I've only had ten beers?
And I haven't had a thing to eat,
Could you lend me an ear?"

The cop said step out please,
Place your hands behind your back,
Put your ass in my back seat,
And shut your "high pitched" trap!

You've got no "title" as a boxer,
No title to this car,
You're "en-titled" to a lawyer,
The prosecutor's Kenneth Starr.


[This message has been edited by Toerag (edited 10-27-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


1 posted 10-27-1999 08:43 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Laughing here, good one!
Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
2 posted 10-27-1999 08:49 AM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

ROFL....great verse Toe....a smile to start my day!

------------------
A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extrordinaire!
Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


3 posted 10-27-1999 09:31 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Excellent!!! This is one "athlete" I'd like to see out of the spotlight! The example he sets for kids is horrible.
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


4 posted 10-27-1999 09:34 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

The example he sets for the human race is horrible!
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


5 posted 10-27-1999 09:39 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

I love this, Toe... I couldn't help but laugh... especially at lending an ear. *G* But I wish he'd show one tiny bit of class and fade into oblivion! His only "title" is loser extraordinaire!!! Well done!
Ohme
Senior Member
since 07-17-99
Posts 831
Texas


6 posted 10-27-1999 09:48 AM       View Profile for Ohme   Email Ohme   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ohme

Toe, this is darling and I love it!
Gone are the days when having a photo on a box of Wheaties meant you were a hero. Today, too many people become a hero by their dishonor.
Systematic Decay
Senior Member
since 09-15-99
Posts 1312
That place with padded walls a


7 posted 10-27-1999 10:05 AM       View Profile for Systematic Decay   Email Systematic Decay   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Systematic Decay

Now, Toe that was quite rude
And cruel to good ole Mike
He's a responsible dude
He teaches little tykes
That the only way to be cool
Is too punch somebody bloody
He is not a drunken fool
In fact he is my buddy!

Ok, no one make fun of me...I tried. Now Im off to have a breakfast of mangled ear....

LOL Toe.

------------------
"Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage."
-Billy Corgan-
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


8 posted 10-27-1999 11:31 AM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

hehe. Ya got this one right, Toe. A good title would be "Heavyweight Chump". Ever since he made Holyfield the "real meal" he's been nothing but a two-bit fighter.

Nicely elucidated.
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


9 posted 10-27-1999 11:36 AM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

You know Toe my dear. I love to read your serious stuff but..........I'd rather listen to you bitch while laughing my ass off....lol. Kudo's to you my friend. Loved this and echo your thoughts. He is a pimple on the face of the human race.
Nan
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Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


10 posted 10-27-1999 12:42 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

LOL - This is SUPERB - How about "Heavyweight Chump/No Title".....
tori
Senior Member
since 06-18-99
Posts 521
Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA


11 posted 10-27-1999 01:39 PM       View Profile for tori   Email tori   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit tori's Home Page   View IP for tori

hahaha. Toe Send this one to the tonight show.lol its much better then his staff can write... :-) very good!!
Watcher666
Senior Member
since 10-13-1999
Posts 1630


12 posted 10-27-1999 02:05 PM       View Profile for Watcher666   Email Watcher666   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Watcher666's Home Page   View IP for Watcher666

ROFL.....excellent!

------------------
Illusion...what we see and what we do...it's all up to you.
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


13 posted 10-27-1999 02:21 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

NAN! You actually complimented me and I got an LOL outta ya! I feel great! Thank you ma'am!

And all the rest of ya too....yall are so nice. I've always detested Mike Tyson. When he was involved with the "rape" case it sickened me. When I heard about his abuse to his wife it made me want to go get him, (guess it was one of those suicide type thoughts) and,..for those of you that do know me and my experience with a rape incident that happened a few years ago you know how I am when it comes to the abuse of children and ladies and a few of you know how my temper is when it comes to things like that. I do thank you all for being so kind to me and my poor attempts at poetry. I guess by using humor I hope to disguise my inadequacies in writing...but you are all always so kind...thanks again.
Verma
Member
since 10-25-1999
Posts 80
Midlands, England


14 posted 10-27-1999 02:49 PM       View Profile for Verma   Email Verma   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Verma

Marvellous ryhme which you 'av ear...
Verma
Member
since 10-25-1999
Posts 80
Midlands, England


15 posted 10-27-1999 02:50 PM       View Profile for Verma   Email Verma   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Verma

Marvellous ryhme you 'av ear.....

Sorry !!!
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


16 posted 10-27-1999 04:33 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Even the brit recognises the worth of this...nice one darling..

HUSG

------------------
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


17 posted 10-27-1999 06:01 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Very clever title for this one! NO TITLE! Love it!

------------------
Denise
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


18 posted 10-27-1999 06:10 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Great one Toe! ROFL, I feel the same way about Tyson. He ain't nothing but a big fairy anyway. No apologies for your poetry my friend. You do a wonderful job! Whether your being serious or a riot, I see it as GREAT! Not a poor attempt.
Munda
Member Elite
since 10-08-1999
Posts 3629
The Hague, The Netherlands


19 posted 10-27-1999 06:28 PM       View Profile for Munda   Email Munda   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Munda's Home Page   View IP for Munda

This is great, Toe !
Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 06-24-99
Posts 2655
Redlands,CA,USA


20 posted 10-27-1999 08:24 PM       View Profile for Andrew Scott   Email Andrew Scott   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Andrew Scott

LOL! Toe... Let's see... K Star as the prosecutor... It'll cost of $40 Mil to get a no-contest... Hmmmm... just about the same to watch that bum fight for the same result! Nice work Toe-man.
Michael
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


21 posted 10-28-1999 07:47 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Well I'm certainly glad I made my way back to this one, Toe, ROFL. You struck me with the "No Title" title, I couldn't imagine you at a loss for words.

------------------
Michael Anderson

Is all that we see or seem
but a dream within a dream?


 
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