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Passions in Poetry

The Willow's Smile

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tori
Senior Member
since 06-18-99
Posts 521
Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA


0 posted 10-21-1999 03:45 AM       View Profile for tori   Email tori   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit tori's Home Page   View IP for tori

As I sat beneath the willow tree
Her branches swayed and danced for me
Her leaves like little lady fingers,
encased in green lace gloves


Wrapped in bark, Seanna shade
Carved out with a sculptors blade
Her bark left marks upon my face
As I wrapped my arms around her


Her smell unique of earth and soil
Her roots protruding, like massive coils
So tall she stands beneath the sky
She brushes clouds as they roll by


As I sat beneath the willow tree
Her movement serenaded me
In a lovely sort of melody
As her beauty made me smile.

1999 tori
---------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------
If with pen in hand I've made you think
I've not wasted one drop of ink
vlh.


© Copyright 1999 Victoria Hosier/tori - All Rights Reserved
Systematic Decay
Senior Member
since 09-15-99
Posts 1312
That place with padded walls a


1 posted 10-21-1999 04:12 AM       View Profile for Systematic Decay   Email Systematic Decay   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Systematic Decay

This poem conjures up a very peacful image.

------------------
"Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage."
-Billy Corgan-
Serraley
Junior Member
since 10-09-1999
Posts 11
New Zealand


2 posted 10-21-1999 06:10 AM       View Profile for Serraley   Email Serraley   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Serraley

Lovely - and I especially like the first verse. The glove line is great.

[This message has been edited by Serraley (edited 10-21-1999).]
Watcher666
Senior Member
since 10-13-1999
Posts 1630


3 posted 10-21-1999 09:55 AM       View Profile for Watcher666   Email Watcher666   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Watcher666's Home Page   View IP for Watcher666

Soft and Sweet........can alomost feel the breeze.

------------------
Illusion...what we see and what we do...it's all up to you.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


4 posted 10-21-1999 10:35 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Tori, this was well done, the imagery beautiful and the format you used with rhyming the first two lines and not the last two of each quatrain as well as making the meter in the last line of each quatrain just a hair different from the first brought new life to this piece as it emphasized the final line of each quatrain. Well done, makes for a nice read!
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


5 posted 10-21-1999 10:44 AM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Tori great imagery! Very picturesque.
tori
Senior Member
since 06-18-99
Posts 521
Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA


6 posted 10-21-1999 07:31 PM       View Profile for tori   Email tori   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit tori's Home Page   View IP for tori

Thanks for reading everyone.. and for the kind words.... I'm glad you enjoyed it..
And by the way under the Willow is my place, of peace... I get some of my best ideas there..
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


7 posted 10-21-1999 07:38 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Yes, you have painted a beautiful peaceful picture.
caroline
Senior Member
since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


8 posted 10-21-1999 07:49 PM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

An excellent and enjoyable read, Tori. I agree that the first stanza is superb! I like this quite a lot!

------------------
"Tread softly, for I have spread my dreams under your feet"~~William Butler Yeats

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


9 posted 10-21-1999 11:21 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Very lovely, tori! Willows are my favorite tree! Your poem described them perfectly!

------------------
Denise
Julie
Senior Member
since 08-20-99
Posts 742
Houston, TX


10 posted 10-21-1999 11:29 PM       View Profile for Julie   Email Julie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Julie

Lovely poem. Really enjoyed the read. Great imagery.

------------------
Julie
-------------------------
Almost all our misfortunes in life come from the wrong notions we have about the things that happen to us.
>Stendhal


tori
Senior Member
since 06-18-99
Posts 521
Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA


11 posted 10-22-1999 01:05 PM       View Profile for tori   Email tori   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit tori's Home Page   View IP for tori

Thanks to all of you for reading and for your kind words !
Mine too dsnyder, The lace leaf, is about the most beautiful of them all. :-)

[This message has been edited by tori (edited 10-22-1999).]
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