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Passions in Poetry

Balladeer's Par, (LongJohn's Scar!)

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Michael
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since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


0 posted 10-06-1999 08:30 PM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Michael

Balladeer's Par (LongJohn's Scar!)

He looked outside to a sun-shiny day,
So LongJohn headed out to the golf course.
Something seemed to be pushing him that way,
Yeah, almost an irresistible force.

Well, he soon arrived there, and sure enough,
Befell his old nemesis, Balladeer!
In the making, this was of truly the stuff -
Only Fate and Justice could engineer.

Primed for revenge, he spoke to Balladeer,
"I got five hundred dollars, says you suck!"
Well, Balladeer just grinned from ear to ear,
As he grabbed the golf clubs out of his truck.

Well, they each hit a few bogies and pars,
The game had turned out to be really tight.
They had raised the stakes from money to cars,
Before the eighteenth tee had come to sight.

Balladeer found himself down by one shot,
And LongJohn had hit by far his best drive.
Everyone watching held there breath in thought -
A perfect shot MIGHT keep Bally alive.

LongJohn, watching in anticipation,
Very well new victory to be near...
Longing to compound Bally's frustration,
Threw a fake cough with a snicker and sneer.

But with the club drawn back, Bally still swung,
And everyone here knows how tension mounts...
Well, the club slipped right out and pain was wrung,
Coming to hit LongJohn just where it counts.

The ambulance arrived and Bally spoke,
"I really hate to see you have to quit."
Adding, "I really liked your coughing joke,"
(grabbing Johns keys), "by the way - you forfeit."

The operation wasn't serious,
A little snip there, a little stitch here.
But, indeed, all of us are curious...
How will he do without sex for a year?

There is a moral for all of us here,
Let me reiterate before I'm Gone...
Don't ever bet against ol' Balladeer,
Lest ye end up like poor "Not So Long" John.

------------------
Michael Anderson

When God puts a tear in your eye,
He puts a rainbow in your heart.




[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 10-07-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


1 posted 10-06-1999 08:36 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Terrific, Michael!...and that's just the way it happened, too. To win, ya always keep your eye on the ball...and hit it squarely. Now, a three inch putt is longer than LongJohn's wanger....and harder, too!
WhtDove
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since 07-22-99
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Illinois


2 posted 10-06-1999 08:37 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

ROFLMAO...Good one Michael! Balladeer that's what they really call a low blow! LOL
Pepper
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since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

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3 posted 10-06-1999 08:43 PM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

Michael this is wonderful......thank you for all the smiles and the laugh out loud........

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
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Hurricane Alley


4 posted 10-06-1999 08:44 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

LOL! Excellent! Never understood the game anyway..balls..holes...putts...sounds nasty!
caroline
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since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


5 posted 10-06-1999 08:47 PM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

~~**LOL**~~!!!!!


Fore!

------------------
"Tread softly, for I have spread my dreams under your feet"~~William Butler Yeats
DreamEvil
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since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


6 posted 10-06-1999 08:58 PM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Well done indeed my friend. Humor suits you.

------------------
Now and forever my heart hears ~one voice~.
DreamEvilŠ

Lucie
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since 06-20-99
Posts 1123
Houston


7 posted 10-07-1999 01:15 AM       View Profile for Lucie   Email Lucie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lucie

Ha Ha Michael.. this poem is better then I ever could have imagined it would be..heheh.

Dreams right.. humor suits you!
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


8 posted 10-07-1999 10:05 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

ROFL... So that explains why the sailor sings soprano! *G*
Nan
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9 posted 10-07-1999 10:26 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Michael! Balladeer!
Are you two bein' haved in this here forum???
Aren't you two 'sposed to be the ones setting a good example?? Geesh - What's moderatorism coming to these days??..
Toerag
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since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


10 posted 10-07-1999 11:15 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Yea, yassee Nan?...They're a bad influence on me....I mean, I was a virgin before I came here and now look at me?....Between these two, Poet deVine, and some of the others I'm becoming such a bad person...Geeesch!!!

Michael...well, yanno old LongJohn calls his little "putter" Arnold......yep....he's a real Arnold "Palmer"....LOL
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


11 posted 10-07-1999 11:43 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

ROFLMAO @ Arnold!!!

Michael & Balladeer: SHAME on you for being such bad influences!!!! LOL. And please don't change! *G*
The Unknown Poet
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since 09-25-1999
Posts 42
Somewhere West of No-Where


12 posted 10-07-1999 03:39 PM       View Profile for The Unknown Poet   Email The Unknown Poet   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for The Unknown Poet

Ah, Nan, don't go so hard on Michael and balladeer...I saw the whole thing, Long John started it all. He should get the public spanking ya know?

------------------
the unknown

what you don't know can't hurt you,
But more than likely can drive you mad.
Saxoness
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since 07-18-99
Posts 1176
Texas


13 posted 10-07-1999 04:29 PM       View Profile for Saxoness   Email Saxoness   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Saxoness

lolol

gimme a *B* gimme an *A* gimme a double *L*
this was great!

------------------
"Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone
I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me."

-Charles Brugnot


Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


14 posted 10-08-1999 09:10 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Yea, but LongJohn likes being spanked pubicly.....
LngJhnAg
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since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


15 posted 10-08-1999 09:56 AM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LngJhnAg

This is an outrage!!! This is unforgiveable! This is a dirty lie! THIS IS SUPERB!

Michael - because we are fellow Michaels (you, me and 'Deer), what you wrote is quite alright. All the rest of you wannabe's - don't even go there. *g*
 
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