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Open Poetry #3
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Blue
Junior Member
since 1999-07-03
Posts 14
Florida

0 posted 1999-10-05 09:14 PM



the sky bleeds
blood like rain seeping from the clouds
tears like rain falling from my eyes
heart split open
exposed to this violent world
the world that weeps with me
the life I bleed into
the sky opens up
and unleashes my pain
red pain
black hurt
hot tears
sharp claws
tear the sky
open wide
expose the truth
mourn my loss
no more angles
light to dark
love to hate
hate that swallows
insanity that consumes
crying into the sky
what happened
to my beautiful sky

© Copyright 1999 Blue - All Rights Reserved
Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
1 posted 1999-10-05 09:46 PM


My God, verbal deep impact. You've left little ol' me speechless, great job!!

------------------
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny, compared to what lies within us.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)


Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
2 posted 1999-10-05 09:46 PM


P.S. I forgot to say Welcome to Passions!

------------------
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny, compared to what lies within us.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)


Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
3 posted 1999-10-05 09:53 PM


God, you've left me speechless on this one.
You depict those emotions so well.
And welcome to Passions..

------------------
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny, compared to what lies within us.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)


Systematic Decay
Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1301
That place with padded walls and funny people in white.........
4 posted 1999-10-06 01:10 AM


Wow, I also thought this was great.

------------------
"Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage."
-Billy Corgan-

Blue
Junior Member
since 1999-07-03
Posts 14
Florida
5 posted 1999-10-06 05:58 AM


Thank you...and my friends just said it was disturbing. :-)
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
6 posted 1999-10-06 09:31 AM


Whew...what imagery
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 1999-10-06 02:19 PM


Blue, your friends do not have [yet] the poetic soul to encompass such a piece. Thank you for joining us, and sharing.
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
8 posted 1999-10-06 02:22 PM


Hey, Blue! This was definitely "Deep Impact". great job of using short jabs from the right and left to drive home a winner. I really think this is great.
Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
9 posted 1999-10-06 02:29 PM


great visual....intense poem.....really enjoyed the read.....Welcome Blue

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams

Blue
Junior Member
since 1999-07-03
Posts 14
Florida
10 posted 1999-10-06 05:14 PM


Thanks again everybody!
Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
11 posted 2005-10-29 01:27 AM


Love the intensity!!!!!

Bridgette

"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again.  To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." A. Brink


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