»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #3
»
Winter-izing
| Open Poetry #3 |
|
Winter-izing |
|
|
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
|
Winter's waves of whiteness settle on the snowy scene, Soft flakes slowly falling on this setting so serene. Pasture grass is covered. Emerald green turns snowy white, Cattle grazing shake their heads on this cold wintery night. I see the rooftop covered now. The chimney stands alone. The shingles shining silvery in melancholy tone. Green forest ferns fill up with snow as they coagulate. Tree branches bend - don't break, though - as they hold the extra weight. I look outside to see the tourists walking down the street, Bermuda shorts and halter tops to beat the morning heat. I don my shorts and t-shirt plus my wide-brimmed hat and then I give the glass globe one more shake to watch the snow again. |
||
| © Copyright 1999 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
I rest inside my humble home, As the snow grows deeper with each flake. It had all been quiet, me there alone, Until, my God! Another Earthquake!!!! [This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (edited 10-05-1999).] |
||
|
Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
*big smiles* love this, great picture  |
||
suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I don't think I'd ever quite looked on those globes as beautiful before. *G* Maybe it's the lack of "You Light Up My Life" or a tinny version of "Winter Wonderland" that makes it so... tasteful. LOL. Great job, 'Deer one... go enjoy your sand and tan tourists! *G* |
||
|
Saxoness
since 1999-07-18
Posts 1102Texas |
I was shivering........then sweating....so this was either an excellent poem, or I'm having hot flashes. lol ------------------ "Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me." -Charles Brugnot |
||
|
Sally S. Senior Member
since 1999-06-07
Posts 847Ohio |
Now you know, I have seen this setting time and time again here in the North but, there aren't many who see it the way you do, my deer. Poor thing, you need a trip up here in the wintertime. It can be breath taking. (You spoiled thing..LOL) |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Balladeer, I give you a hole in one on this poem. Nice job |
||
|
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent, as usual! You paint such a romantic picture of winter and then surprise us with the ending! I've enjoyed(?) winters all my life. I have a love/hate relationship with this time of year! I'll post one of my views for you! It's called Slip 'n' Slide ! ------------------ Denise |
||
|
Lucie Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077Houston |
Balladeer, I honestly found this poem to be very charming.. I loved the end.. I am gonna print this for my special file. Make me smile again huh? Will ya, will ya? Please!!! |
||
|
Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
I loved the beautiful imagery in the beginning of the poem , and the surprise ending was delightful......Great piece Sir...... ------------------ May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams |
||
|
RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Well Balladeer, you may get to hold this picture of magic in your hands and to be able to shake it but I get to see it for real as the snow falls so I watch from my windows, fire casting shadows, paw prints sinking as they explore the snow kingdom..:-) Thanks for the visual HUSG ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
||
|
Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
LOL ... my first thought when I read this was "winterizing...? In Florida...?!?" You mean, like, getting out the Christmas music..? Lord knows the only way you know its winter in Florida is by when the stores put out the darn decorations ... This was cute, though, and when I read the first stanza, I didn't expect the Floridian ending ... well done. Nocht ------------------ "Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus" (Now as I hear this bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.") |
||
|
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you all for the warm comments. I'll keep trying, Lucie. Denise....Slip & Slide? You wrote a poem about my love life? |
||
|
Systematic Decay Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1301That place with padded walls and funny people in white......... |
I loved this one. I especially liked the line: The shingles shining silvery in melancholy tone. And the ending was a nice suprise ------------------ "Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage." -Billy Corgan- |
||
|
Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
ahh yes sweet Balladeer..you have again succeeded in surprising me with the ending...LOL. There is one thing about the winter scene that I found missing (IMHO the most breath taking sight in winter). When there has been a warm period and it rains then freezes. The ice hangs from everything, coating it in a layer of glass. The sun sparkles as it softly caresses every branch and leaf. (So I can't find anything truely wrong with any of your work...sue me...LOL) |
||
|
WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
I'm with Nocht up there. I was thinking that too, in Florida? I had this beautiful vision in my head of that first snowfall of the year. The ground being covered by the beauty of white pureness, then it all melted in the next line. What a surprise that was! Very well done Balladeer! I love this one! |
||
|
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you, SD. I like it, too. Marilyn, my law firm of Dewey, Screwum & Howe will contact you in the morning! (thanks for the kind words) |
||
|
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you, SD. I like it, too. Marilyn, my law firm of Dewey, Screwum & Howe will contact you in the morning! (thanks for the kind words) |
||
|
Lucie Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077Houston |
I just love when you repeat yourself like that...like that...like that...like that hahahhahahaha |
||
|
Pufalove Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 119Houston, Tx. USA |
As usual, you've succeeded in taking my breath away. Beautifully done! Amen to all the above,( and your replys even got a needed laugh outta Lucie...haha). See how ya are. ------------------ O all ye powers that he implanted, Arise, keep silence no more; put forth the strength that he hath granted, your noblest work is to adore. |
||
|
U K Hero Member
since 1999-08-08
Posts 266England |
well done balladeer, that last line was top notch, bravo, bravo; |
||
|
Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Loved this Balladeer...well done, great unexpected ending....... |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Went to post a reply yesterday, but the server went kaplu-ey. Guess what I was going to post was not server-compatible. So, I'll just ditto, ditto all of the above. I was in Florida last October, reminded me of CA, so, I was glad to come back to Kansas. Oops. Rebel me! |
||
|
hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Wonderfully done Balladeer, that last stanza threw me...I like this!! |
||
|
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you all....very much. Keep smiling, Lucie. |
||
|
Kelly Member
since 1999-07-03
Posts 145 |
I love it. I've lived in LA all my life so I see winter as something to visit. |
||
|
LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Kelly Its a nice to visit, but you wouldn't want to stay - lol |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||