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Passions in Poetry

Love, Ego, and a bit of Schizophrenia - Act I Scene II

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Bob
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since 09-04-99
Posts 8


0 posted 10-03-1999 05:35 PM       View Profile for Bob   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Bob

(Forgive the delay, I have been entirely too busy these past few days.)

Act I - Scene II
Enter Becki and Holly

[Holly]
Hello Becki, and how are you today?

[Becki]
As well as I can be from where I stand.
I followed some advice from Amanda
And asked Andy to escort me to the
Party that is to be held at Jennieís.
When first I did see him my heart fluttered.
My knees grew weak, my toungue refused to speak.
Why did this happen to me then and there?

[Holly]
O Becki, whatever you do, do not
Ever follow the advice of Amanda.
You experience the symptoms of love.
To date, there is not a single cure.
This venomous beast that some would call joy
Attacks the mind and wit of those it strikes.
My advice to you is this: run away,
Run away and never look back to him.

[Becki]
Too late, my heart would die if I did that.

[Holly]
What can I say, you win some you lose some.
Enjoy it will you can, heís a nice guy.

[Becki]
He seems to be, but thereís something more there.
Beneath that concrete exterior
There is a silliness that wants to get out.
I know itís there, itís just been starved till now.

[Holly]
Tell me another joke Becki. There is
No way that Andy could be silly.
There is not a more serious man than he.

[Becki]
We shall see tonight. Oh no. Here comes Mike.
Enter Mike

[Mike]
Hello Becki, how are you doing?

[Becki]
About as well as I can {aside} with him here.

[Holly]
Hello Mike.

[Mike]
Oh yeah, hi Holly, you well?

[Holly]
{aside} Well is a relative term here with him here.

[Mike]
Excuse me, anyway, Becki, I must ask-

[Becki]
Andy has already asked to escort
Me to the party at Jennieís tonight.

[Mike]
Holly-

[Holly]
Nathaniel is escorting me tonight.

[Mike]
Well wonderful, who am I to ask?
You are the two women that men do seek.
There is not another girl left unescorted.

[Becki]
I do believe that Amanda is not.

[Mike]
O fine, leave me with Amanda, I guess...
Mike exits

[Becki]
Holly, Nathaniel is yet to ask you.
What if he does not, what then shall you do?

[Holly]
All I can do, hope that Mike does not come.



[This message has been edited by Bob (edited 10-03-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Bob - All Rights Reserved
JohnDoe82
Junior Member
since 08-04-99
Posts 42
MO, USA


1 posted 10-03-1999 09:47 PM       View Profile for JohnDoe82   Email JohnDoe82   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JohnDoe82

Ah, the plot thickens. Well done.
DarkKnight
Junior Member
since 09-23-1999
Posts 12


2 posted 10-04-1999 04:55 PM       View Profile for DarkKnight   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for DarkKnight

My friend, I find thee on these new grounds and yet find myself lacking in poetry by which to comment. So live ye with my prose. It will be most entertaining to watch this develop across the acts, but one must wonder if you have a definitive climactic moment in mind as you write now. Try you too hard to create meaning in nonsense? Not to say your work is nonsense, but 'twill be a great disappointment to discover that all we can partake of is a mere shallow splash when we, from the depths of wisdom, expected an ocean. And by chance, look at lines four and five. This seems a rather rough place for a break, even if the written and spoken word is different. The mere reading of it all is cause for eyestrain! Pray you, take not insult, for my intention is only curiosity and my words only that of a fool. Write on...

------------------
She walks in silence and waits in shadow. She is my lady and my angel.

[This message has been edited by DarkKnight (edited 10-04-1999).]
Bob
New Member
since 09-04-99
Posts 8


3 posted 10-04-1999 08:00 PM       View Profile for Bob   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Bob

I know, even when I read it I find it a little dry right now. Unfortunately I have to introduce all these characters in the first act. Things should become more interesting in the next longer scene. I most definately know the entire sequence of events for this play. In fact, I've already written the climax scene, if you will. Ideally it will become far more interesting as I continue, but for now, bear with me. Scene III should not be long in coming.
 
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