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Open Poetry #1
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DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396


0 posted 1999-08-30 07:11 AM


My trembling hand begins to stroke your hair.
Unsure, I dare to look into your eyes.
I tilt your head to me with gentle care.
Your kiss is both my reward and my prize.

I feel your body press up against mine.
The heat coming from you feeds my desire.
Pouting lips glow with the hue of red wine.
The love in my heart becomes a bonfire.

To the song in our hearts we will dance.
The love between us will always be there.
Entwining our arms we find romance.
Locked in this embrace we haven't a care.

The pain of that memory has been bled.
For three years now my lover has been dead.


©1999 DreamEvil


------------------
Shall I indulge in flights of fancy hampered by clipped wings?
DreamEvil©



© Copyright 1999 DreamEvil - All Rights Reserved
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

1 posted 1999-08-30 08:34 AM


WOW, Dream, this is beautiful. But sad also
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
2 posted 1999-08-30 08:36 AM


Here I was ready to say how romantic! Then wow, what a twist at the end! 'Twas romance with a sad ending! Great job! What a surprise!
Cinderella
Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 152
Arizona
3 posted 1999-08-30 09:11 AM


How touching....Wonderful!
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
4 posted 1999-08-30 10:15 AM


Tragicly sad
Gentle Soul
Member
since 1999-07-12
Posts 273
Vinton,Ohio USA
5 posted 1999-08-30 02:07 PM


wow brother.. productive nite I see.. this is good as usual love..

------------------
Gënt£ë¤§°û£


Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
6 posted 1999-08-30 02:26 PM


How many times have I been unpleasantly surprised with an ending like this The meter in this one is great, DE. Is it a true experience?

------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."


Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
7 posted 1999-08-30 05:56 PM


beautiful and sad...I love it.

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams

miriam
Member
since 1999-08-26
Posts 323
glendale,ca.
8 posted 1999-08-30 06:03 PM


great twist at the end. But still...im sorry if it's true for you.

------------------
miriam coronado

Tara Simms
Senior Member
since 1999-08-12
Posts 1244
Honea Path, SC USA
9 posted 1999-08-30 06:08 PM


Romance with a dark side, hmm? Light some candles! Illuminate yourself.
~one voice~
Senior Member
since 1999-07-08
Posts 664
Billings, MT USA
10 posted 1999-08-30 08:03 PM


Dream, this is a beautiful dark side to romance... I like it...

------------------
~onevoice~

"She looked at her life
like lines, never-ending,
constantly forming,
reforming and bending."



Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
11 posted 1999-08-30 10:30 PM


If you left off the last two lines, you would have a perfect love poem! With the last two, you have a perfect love poem that's sad!

Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
12 posted 1999-08-30 11:09 PM


What a twist at the end, Dream...took me by surprise..exellent work, beautifully sad.

------------------
*Krista Knutson*

I see the world through the loving eyes of my heart, and suffer the pain of unfulfilled visions. -- Daniel L. Miller



Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906
Sitting in Michael's Lap
13 posted 1999-08-30 11:14 PM


Ouch ... dead metaphorically, I hope?

Excellent poem.

------------------
"Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus"
(Now as I hear this bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.")



Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
14 posted 1999-08-31 12:06 PM


Ah,
You got me on this one - didn't see how you could possibly turn this one so sad with just two lines left. A sweet yet sad Sonnet.
Good work.


Michael

thursdayschild
Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 169
Houston, Tx.
15 posted 1999-12-17 02:07 AM


Quite a rotation...as the reader is seductively drawn in to these
sweet words of love, then totally
shocked into sadness.  
Well written, as always.

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