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Passions in Poetry

Heartbreak Genesis

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H. Arlequin
Member
since 08-23-99
Posts 211


0 posted 08-28-99 03:36 AM       View Profile for H. Arlequin   Email H. Arlequin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit H. Arlequin's Home Page   View IP for H. Arlequin


Heartbreak Genesis

In the beginning darkness, spatial deep...
plankton, bacteria, time prepense, asleep
in creation's yet to be, man, days away...
the Logos spoke a ramah to light day
one, and what He said, He saw was good.

The omnipresent Spirit's aegis hovering,
pre-existent, Father, Son, the One covering
creation's pangs, out of the canopy gray,
spoke sweet from salt and sky to fill day
two, and what He saw, He said was good.

"Let the waters be gathered in one place,
let dry ground arise and show its face,
let the land grow plants, and fruit convey
both food and seed", thus it was so in day
three, and what He said, He saw was good.

"Let the lights shine through canopy mist
that seasons of days and years will persist,
let sun, moon and stars in delight display
the magnificence of the iniverse, to see day
four", and what He saw, He said was good.

"Let the water teem with life beneath the sky
let the earth proliferate with birds that fly,
each according to their kind, in issue repay."
He spoke, fish and fowl were created in day
five, and what He said, He saw was good.

"Let the land produce life, male and female,
let Us make man like Us, let him prevail
over creatures of sea, land, and air, stay
the thirst, knowing Us, to be Us after day
six", and what He saw, would break His heart.


--H. Arlequin
© Copyright 1999 H. Arlequin - All Rights Reserved
DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


1 posted 08-28-99 03:44 AM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Very complicated rhyme scheme to this piece. 'Tis rich in imagery as well as being an interesting retelling of the Creation.

------------------
Shall I indulge in flights of fancy hampered by clipped wings?
DreamEvilŠ


Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


2 posted 08-28-99 09:13 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

I'm afraid that I need to study this one more - I see a very simple rhyme scheme woven quite intricately into a wonderfully flowing work.. Your theme is, of course, is masterful - I just feel that there is more to be uncovered with every read.... stay tuned - I'll be returning to this one for sure....
caroline
Senior Member
since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


3 posted 08-28-99 09:33 AM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

Magnificent! The way you have used the imagery, message and rhyme scheme together reminds me of a quilt...beautiful things all stitched together to become something awesome. This is wonderful work, you should be very proud.

------------------
The only man worth your tears will never make you cry...
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


4 posted 08-28-99 02:48 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

H.Arlequin,
This is a piece of Zen and like Nan will have to read it again.
Wonderful job.
Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
5 posted 08-28-99 07:09 PM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

remarkable ...loved this one...agree with all above, will reread this again and again

------------------

Shannon
H. Arlequin
Member
since 08-23-99
Posts 211


6 posted 08-30-99 01:13 AM       View Profile for H. Arlequin   Email H. Arlequin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit H. Arlequin's Home Page   View IP for H. Arlequin

the profusion of your wonderful comments
excite an ancient heart to strive for those unattainable mountains heights, reinvigorated, remotivated....


smoooooooooches all :-))

HA
 
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