How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #1 Archive
 A falling star
 1 2 3 4 5
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

A falling star

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


0 posted 08-20-99 10:51 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

The clouds were twirling, changing form
The stars were smothered all around
And silence screamed inside the storm
The sky was blending with the ground

The world was shocked to see this sight
And people stunned with sudden change
My pen could not portray this night
And not a word stayed on my page

The rain was pouring with great pressure
It silenced screams and cries and hoots
The evil moon observed with pleasure
As trees were overturned with roots

The thunder barked along with hounds
And lightning lit up skies afar
And through the barricades of clouds
I caught a glimpse of a falling star


------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
© Copyright 1999 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 06-16-99
Posts 3968
In the space between moments


1 posted 08-20-99 10:55 PM       View Profile for Alwye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alwye

Wow, wonderful!!! I love storms...don't you?? Great work!!

------------------
*Krista Knutson*

"If I could be an angel, I'd make your every wish come true. But I am only human, just a woman lovin' you..." Trisha Yearwood

Starith
Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 181
Leesburg, FL USA


2 posted 08-21-99 12:02 AM       View Profile for Starith   Email Starith   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Starith

"My pen could not portray this night
And not a word stayed on my page"

love those lines ... good work

------------------
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


3 posted 08-21-99 01:42 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks for your comments, someone proposed to me to take the second stanza out, what do you think?
Sue
Member
since 08-04-99
Posts 407
France


4 posted 08-21-99 04:15 PM       View Profile for Sue   Email Sue   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sue

I like the second stanza very much, but I'm not sure if it fits with the rest of the poem. Maybe you could use it in another context?
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


5 posted 08-21-99 08:11 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

THanks Sue! I agree with you now that I've read it over.

------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
 
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #1 >> A falling star Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors