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Passions in Poetry

The Escape.....

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Balladeer
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Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


0 posted 08-20-99 06:07 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

I was the man on duty,
The only prison guard.
It was my job to keep him locked
Up in the prison ward.

He tried every trick to get out.
A clever fiend was he.
He begged me to be let out
But I held fast the key.

And then, one day, it happened.
I'd barely closed my eyes
When he up and walked right past me
In cleverest disguise.

He looked so very righteous
I didn't really see
The cruelty he had within
As he slipped out of me.

The prison was my consciouseness
The prisoner interred
Who slipped out with my guard down
Was a simple, unkind word.

There's no reason to pursue him,
No way of keeping track
For, once an unkind word escapes,
You never get it back.

I only hope its victims,
Wherever they may be
Forgive my momentary lapse
And not think ill of me.

Guard all your unkind words, my friends.
Your victims, too, have pride.
Use all your strength to keep, at length,
Those criminals inside.
© Copyright 1999 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


1 posted 08-20-99 06:10 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

So much truth to this one Balladeer!!! We all need to bridle our tongue at times. Very good!
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


2 posted 08-20-99 07:44 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Very true Balladeer
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


3 posted 08-20-99 08:37 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Nice to hear from you, Hoot. Welcome back.

and thank you, WhtDove
Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 08-15-99
Posts 1966
Sitting in Michael's Lap


4 posted 08-20-99 09:05 PM       View Profile for Skyfyre   Email Skyfyre   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfyre

This was good ... and true.

One question ... why did you drop the personification in the 7th stanza? ("its" victims rather than "his"?)

------------------
"Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus"
(When I hear the bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.")

Fred Hobbs
Member
since 06-08-99
Posts 353
Tallahassee, Florida, US


5 posted 08-20-99 09:32 PM       View Profile for Fred Hobbs   Email Fred Hobbs   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Fred Hobbs's Home Page   View IP for Fred Hobbs

Hey Balladeer...

They just keep getting better man. Don't know how you do it!

sandman
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


6 posted 08-20-99 09:59 PM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

gay me the goosebumbs it did it did
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


7 posted 08-20-99 10:03 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Nice going, Nochtdraco. Very perceptive of you to pick that up. Actually, by the time I had gotten to that point, I realised that I had used the masculine form to describe it every time, so I threw in an "it" to make it a neuter (words can be feminine, too). It really wasn't a good choice. I should have remained constant in my description....and I do appreciate your questioning it. Thank you.
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


8 posted 08-20-99 10:15 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Ah, very good! You never seem to run out of subjects....you're like the energizer battery of the Passions forums.....keep banging that drum, bunny balladeer!

....my mother said "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".....
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 06-16-99
Posts 3968
In the space between moments


9 posted 08-20-99 10:50 PM       View Profile for Alwye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alwye

Yes, very good, balladeer!! So true, your words are. We all at one point or another hurt others with our words...

------------------
*Krista Knutson*

"If I could be an angel, I'd make your every wish come true. But I am only human, just a woman lovin' you..." Trisha Yearwood

redwriter1
Member
since 07-22-99
Posts 476
Franklin, TN


10 posted 08-21-99 01:14 AM       View Profile for redwriter1   Email redwriter1   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for redwriter1

That was very well put! I must watch my door carefully..

Another one I like is:
Better to keep silent and be thought a
fool, then speak and remove all doubt.
(twain I think). (smile)

I need to repeat that one to myself often.
(sigh).

Nice job!



------------------
Kay-lynn
**A dream is a wish your heart makes :)

DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


11 posted 08-21-99 01:17 AM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Revered Elder, you have once again proven your right to that title.

------------------
Shall I indulge in flights of fancy hampered by clipped wings?
DreamEvilŠ


elvira
Senior Member
since 07-06-99
Posts 985
California


12 posted 08-21-99 02:52 AM       View Profile for elvira   Email elvira   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for elvira

of course, like everyone else, i have regretted words spoken in haste...despite a multitude of classes, it is difficult to remember all those interpersonal communication "rules"...and, well, sometimes i just want to tick someone off

PS: writing is so much better, gives us a chance to edit
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


13 posted 08-21-99 09:03 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Excellent poem, 'Deer one... and such food for thought. I'm reminded of the singsong chant we all heard (and used *G*) in playgrounds: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"... and how untrue that statement is! The pen can cut deeper than the sword and leave wounds that take much longer to heal.
All of us have been poor guards at one time or another and let prisoners escape that should have remained locked away... I like your imagery... *G* I always think of ugly balloons escaping my mouth... and me wishing desperately I could stuff them back in! LOL. Great job!
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


14 posted 08-21-99 09:08 AM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LngJhnAg

'Deer

Words are stones, not kites.
Words are asps, they bite.
Words are free for us to use.
The cost is when they abuse.

Nicely, done, 'Deer.
~one voice~
Senior Member
since 07-08-99
Posts 668
Billings, MT USA


15 posted 08-21-99 10:46 AM       View Profile for ~one voice~   Email ~one voice~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ~one voice~

As usual, Balladeer, you've written something true and wonderful! You touch me everytime.

------------------
~onevoice~

"She looked at her life
like lines, never-ending,
constantly forming,
reforming and bending."


Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


16 posted 08-21-99 10:55 AM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

Sir Balladeer, I am beginning to think of you as the Wizard of Passions, able to grant us anything, for with a mind so full of inspiration, and a pen worthy of your words, you constantly grant us access to your wisdom, which is as bright as any star that shines down on us. Thank-you for all your wonderful masterpieces you share so kindly with us.
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


17 posted 08-21-99 11:19 AM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

Aaaahhh, I loved the idea behind this thing!! What a work of wonder...I wasn't sure where you were going with it at first, but wow, what an ending, and such a powerful message it sent!! (even better) Yes indeed, you are the Master of poetic masterpiece!! I haven't asked you before, but how long have you been writing for....??? Curious...

------------------
- poet FemmeFatale

"The strongest man in the world is he who stands most alone..." Henrik Ibsen (1826-1906) Norwegian dramatist lyric poet

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


18 posted 08-21-99 11:45 AM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Balladeer,
You did it again. How many times can I say Bravo? You sure you don't have a book on wise sayings? If you do I'd like to borrow it.
Blondie
Member
since 08-06-99
Posts 307
Ohio


19 posted 08-21-99 11:46 AM       View Profile for Blondie   Email Blondie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Blondie

very true!
blueloon
Member
since 07-07-99
Posts 166
NY


20 posted 08-21-99 02:21 PM       View Profile for blueloon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for blueloon

Every word that was written should be a testament of truth to all of us. Thank you for never running out of anything to write about!
blueloon
Starith
Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 181
Leesburg, FL USA


21 posted 08-21-99 03:01 PM       View Profile for Starith   Email Starith   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Starith

Balladeer,

Sometimes we forget that all our hard work in this world can be broke down by one foolish action or word.

Thank you for reminding us.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


22 posted 08-21-99 03:16 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Bravo, dear Sir. But an unkind word from you? We are now all humbled to know that you are human, too.
snacks
Junior Member
since 08-21-99
Posts 35
NJ


23 posted 08-21-99 03:45 PM       View Profile for snacks   Email snacks   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for snacks

very true..I loved this poem.
Sue
Member
since 08-04-99
Posts 407
France


24 posted 08-21-99 03:58 PM       View Profile for Sue   Email Sue   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sue

A simply wonderful metaphor, a very wise message, all packed up, as usual, in a brilliant poem. Thank you, Balladeer.
 
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