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Passions in Poetry

Self-deceit (my first pantoum)

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DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


0 posted 08-18-99 10:33 PM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

I creep through this life unheard and unseen.
A woman's touch is forbidden treasure.
When close to a woman I feel unclean.
Their disdain I receive in full measure.

A woman's touch is forbidden treasure.
My fears heighten my desire all the more.
Their disdain I receive in full measure.
Quiet disregard evens each old score.

My fears heighten my desire all the more.
Even their scorn is a heady delight.
Quiet disregard evens each old score.
Passion prevents my return to the Night.


Even their scorn is a heady delight.
Much of my worth is based on self-deceit.
Passion prevents my return to the Night.
Women have made this deception complete.

Much of my worth is based on self-deceit.
This lie has been uncovered just in time.
Women have made this deception complete.
I now unravel that lie with my rhyme.

This lie has been uncovered just in time.
When close to a woman I feel unclean.
I now unravel that lie with my rhyme.
I creep through this life unheard and unseen.


©1999 DreamEvil

------------------
Shall I indulge in flights of fancy hampered by clipped wings?
DreamEvil©


© Copyright 1999 DreamEvil - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


1 posted 08-18-99 10:56 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

DreamEvil,
I enjoyed your Pantoum very much It is a subject I would not have picked but you did well. By the way did you get my anwser to your Email?
Gentle Soul
Member
since 07-12-99
Posts 274
Vinton,Ohio USA


2 posted 08-19-99 01:44 AM       View Profile for Gentle Soul   Email Gentle Soul   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Gentle Soul

Dream have I told you lately how good of a poet you are?

------------------
Gėnt£ė¤§°ū£

Nicole
Senior Member
since 06-23-99
Posts 1896
Florida


3 posted 08-19-99 03:31 AM       View Profile for Nicole   Email Nicole   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Nicole

Such a well written pantoum...such a distressing subject. You projected the feelings very well.

------------------
"Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with." *Mark Twain*
Dragoness
Senior Member
since 08-07-99
Posts 525


4 posted 08-19-99 05:41 AM       View Profile for Dragoness   Email Dragoness   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Dragoness's Home Page   View IP for Dragoness

Nicely done,brother.Welcome home!

------------------
Set you heart free and your mind will follow.
IsabelleSkye
Member
since 06-27-99
Posts 262


5 posted 08-19-99 09:05 AM       View Profile for IsabelleSkye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for IsabelleSkye

WOW! That was an incredible read...I wanna write one too..*grabbing pen*
Too kewl DE, glad yer back my friend
Izzy

------------------
"I would rather sit on a pumpkin, and have it all to myself,
than to be crowded on a velvet cushion."
.....Henry David Thoreau
pen of passion
Member
since 08-11-99
Posts 240


6 posted 08-19-99 09:40 AM       View Profile for pen of passion   Email pen of passion   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for pen of passion

DreamEvil, I'm your greatest fan.
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


7 posted 08-19-99 10:28 AM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

This one kind of twisted here, blame it all on us won't you! hehe
~one voice~
Senior Member
since 07-08-99
Posts 668
Billings, MT USA


8 posted 08-19-99 01:20 PM       View Profile for ~one voice~   Email ~one voice~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ~one voice~

Very excellent! I enjoy watching your talent grow every day.

------------------
~onevoice~

"She looked at her life
like lines, never-ending,
constantly forming,
reforming and bending."


Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


9 posted 08-19-99 06:12 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

You got this format down, DE - now onto the next......
DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


10 posted 08-20-99 05:48 AM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Thank you everyone, I was hesitant about posting a new style. Nan, thank you immensely and I'm eagerly awaiting a new challenge.
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


11 posted 08-20-99 10:16 AM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

DE,
Wonderful pantoum
You da man.
Rita
Member
since 07-19-99
Posts 56
Danville Va. 24540


12 posted 08-21-99 01:24 AM       View Profile for Rita   Email Rita   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rita

again, well written, beautiful again.

------------------
"And the day came, where the risk to remain tight in a bud, was more painful than the risk it took to blossom"
 
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