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Passions in Poetry

Ridges - a really rare attempt at free verse

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LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


0 posted 08-18-99 08:51 PM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for LngJhnAg


Distant lines of geometry
Tracing where my heart yearns
Standing in line, waiting
For me to receive their call.
The first call, a whisper,
Through pines, around cedars,
Tempting me to the first ridge
Where a symphony of yearning awaits.
Standing there,
I watch the mountains,
Each named by others,
Each knowing my name.
Shhh. Can you hear them, too?
I start down through the boughs,
Until the only sound I hear,
Is the sound of my own loneliness.
The next ridge awaits,
Just out of reach,
But just within reach.
Shhh.
I think it's calling me again.
Yes. The next ridge needs me, too.
But now, the only ridges I see
Are those of my past.
The ridges call,
But only for my youth.


© Copyright 1999 Michael Waterman - All Rights Reserved
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


1 posted 08-18-99 09:10 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

See - Here I am - I sat and waited until you posted so I could comment.....

and it's good - You've got some pretty darned good imagery going for you..
the symphony of yearning awaits
very nice
and then
the sound of my own loneliness......
'tis good....'tis good.....yep....

------------------
Nay, if our wits run the Wild-Goose chase, I am done:
For thou hast more of the Wild-Goose in one of thy wits,
Than I am sure I have in my whole five.
~ 1592 Wm. Shakespeare ~ Romeo & Juliet ~ ii. iv. 75




[This message has been edited by Nan (edited 08-18-99).]
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


2 posted 08-18-99 09:22 PM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LngJhnAg

nan - please oh please.... tell me this wasn't a pity-post. LOL -

Thank you for your comments. looking forward to meeting the lil school amrm in September... I hope I can stifle my urge to corner you and get some free poetry lessons.
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


3 posted 08-18-99 09:34 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Giggling
.....Hehehehe..... I finally have a man threatening to get me in a corner..... and all he wants from me are poetry lessons.....


------------------
Nay, if our wits run the Wild-Goose chase, I am done:
For thou hast more of the Wild-Goose in one of thy wits,
Than I am sure I have in my whole five.
~ 1592 Wm. Shakespeare ~ Romeo & Juliet ~ ii. iv. 75


Lorelei54
Member
since 07-27-99
Posts 486


4 posted 08-19-99 12:14 PM       View Profile for Lorelei54   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lorelei54

Nan..what ever you get out of this man..its worth waiting for...don't let him fool you with his words of needing lessons...he's a genuis in his own ways!
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


5 posted 08-19-99 12:31 PM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

LngJhnAg, What a talent you have for the written word, splendid job, I liked it.
Sue
Member
since 08-04-99
Posts 407
France


6 posted 08-19-99 03:32 PM       View Profile for Sue   Email Sue   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sue

YES, YES, YES, YES. Free verse can be beautiful!
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


7 posted 08-19-99 04:56 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Wonderful job, LJA!

------------------
Sunshine
Words will always express our feelings true. ~~~ KRJ
Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


8 posted 08-19-99 05:04 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Well LJA, you know you'd never get a pity post from Belle! LOL. And I like it... good job, sailor!
caroline
Senior Member
since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


9 posted 08-19-99 07:07 PM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

If this is your first attempt, please write more free verse! The imagery is just lovely. I think you are good at this!

------------------
The only man worth your tears will never make you cry...
pen of passion
Member
since 08-11-99
Posts 240


10 posted 08-19-99 09:31 PM       View Profile for pen of passion   Email pen of passion   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for pen of passion

Oh, so cool.
 
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