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Madmen on the Loose...
| Open Poetry #1 |
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Madmen on the Loose... |
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Carolina Girl Member
since 1999-08-14
Posts 63 |
Why? Watching them cross Hand in hand Sent chills down my spine as tears rolled down my cheeks. Another madman gone wild In the city of LA. The children did no wrong. This poor excuse for a human Taking their lives into his own hands. Bloody cold hands. Then to hear the question asked On the Today show... "Is this Y2K related?" Fear overcame my useless mind and body. Is this it? Is this the beginning Of a Global Meltdown, Of morals, values, and mankind???? I cry for the children. I cry for their loss of innocence, carefree spirit, and childhood. Lost in a world filling with more hate, each and every day. I want to close my eyes and sleep. Sleep no more Only to be awakened by reality Of madmen running rampant in our society. |
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| © Copyright 1999 Carolina Girl - All Rights Reserved | |||
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
This is such a powerful little piece, and I can't believe you didn't get not one reply ! I like to go through the poems with no replies, and see if I can see what the writer had to say - and wow, This is a very moving epic!! I've read your poems, and know they're good - may I suggest something - a different title to catch the reader's eye and make them want to read it? Examples: Madmen on the loose - or maybe Global Warming with madness - - - something that will cause a scrolling reader to stop and check it out!! Your poems are definately worthy to be read, but this is something I learned here.....the title is what catches the attention FIRST.....Try it, you'll probably acquire a fan club fast!! ~~kisses ------------------ - poet FemmeFatale "The strongest man in the world is he who stands most alone..." Henrik Ibsen (1826-1906) Norwegian dramatist lyric poet |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Carolina Girl, I'm afraid PFF is right. Take her suggestion I enjoy your writing and think you have talent. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
CG - You work is, indeed, good - If you want to change a title, you'll need to contact me. You can edit your own text, but only moderators can delete or change title lines...  |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
 ------------------ Nay, if our wits run the Wild-Goose chase, I am done: For thou hast more of the Wild-Goose in one of thy wits, Than I am sure I have in my whole five. ~ ²1592 Wm. Shakespeare ~ Romeo & Juliet ~ ii. iv. 75 |
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Carolina Girl Member
since 1999-08-14
Posts 63 |
I tell you what...this site has to have the BEST and most EFFICIENT moderators on the web! You guys are great!!!! Thank you!! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I'm going to be honest here - first I love the poem - second, when you first started posting, you put about 6 new poems onto the forum at once...I read a couple as I try to get the newbies on their first day and welcome them. I could not read all 6 at that time..it's unfortunate that this happens a lot....the poems move so quickly here - wait until you hear how many people access the site! It's hard to stop and read each poem and sometimes, gems get lost in the shuffle. That's why it's also a good idea, once in awhile, to go back a few pages and find the poems that no one responded to and read them, if you like them, reply and send it to the top for us to find...as PFF did. Your work is great, by the way. It's exciting to see so much talent here!  |
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