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Open Poetry #1
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Megs72484
New Member
since 1999-08-14
Posts 1


0 posted 1999-08-14 12:26 PM


Hi, this is a sonnet I wrote in my 9 grade honors English class during the Romeo and Juliet unit. I almost have the 10 beats per line down. I just came upon it the other day and I'd like some of your opinions because I'd like to know how my writing is.

Memories

We all hold childhood memories dear
We hope they stick with us to the very end
They can disappear like a childhood fear
To these memory lapses do not surrend
To grandchildren your memories enlighten
The good times will stick like cement
Your friends are what make memories happen
They are the most important element
So in your actions be careful not to harm
Because good memories are much more fun
But if you hurt try fixing it through charm
After childhood memories are not done
Hopefully as you grow they get stronger
And maybe they will get even longer

© Copyright 1999 Megs72484 - All Rights Reserved
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
1 posted 1999-08-14 12:40 PM


Welcome to the family! A worthy first posting. It was a little hard to find the rhythm so I read it again...was easier. You have talent that's for sure. Post some more and let's read them!

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
2 posted 1999-08-14 09:49 AM


Hey Megs - Welcome

Any sonnet writer is a welcome addition here... Your rhyme scheme is perfect, and your iambic pentameter is close... I'll take some time to critique it for ya.....

------------------
Nay, if our wits run the Wild-Goose chase, I am done:
For thou hast more of the Wild-Goose in one of thy wits,
Than I am sure I have in my whole five.
~ ²1592 Wm. Shakespeare ~ Romeo & Juliet ~ ii. iv. 75



passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
3 posted 2004-04-20 04:04 AM


hey! this is good! I love the rhyme scheme!
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
4 posted 2004-04-20 04:04 AM


hey! this is good! I love the rhyme scheme!
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2004-04-20 04:05 AM


hey! this is good! I love the rhyme scheme!
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2004-04-20 04:07 AM


oooooppps! don't know what happened but it said the page was not avaliable when I posted the first time...darn "back" button!
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