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Poetwheel
Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 208
Canada

0 posted 1999-08-10 10:05 AM


The winds tore at the sea that day, and shook our noble craft,
Launched from Coastal Newfoundland, "DROVERVILLE-1" upon her aft.
Captain 'Deer, and the noble crew, all masters of the sea,
had brought along, for song and fun, Poetwheel's Basil and Craigwell C.

Now Basil was a sailor true, despite lacking arms or wits,
and Craigwell was a pirate once, but prone to skirts with slits,
With Balladeer, at the helm, the ship sailed straight and fast,
And the knickers of fair Elvira, our purple colors, atop the mast.

"A ship upon the horizon," came the call from our Crow's Nest,
We tightened our demeaner and Basil donned his frilly vest.
We held our breath, with fear and dread, as the ship came into view,
Whatever beast did man its helm was bloated and green in hue.

Quickly the gruesome find was made, which made us wretch and fall,
The ship was full of corpses, old and rotting one and all.
Good Balladeer was first to move, and swung braveley to its deck
To find a cause or reason for this "grave-boat's" eerie trek.

Basil rightly cowered, but Cragiwell edged him on,
and soon the duo joined him, after putting nighties on.
They found their captain below the deck holding a leather tome
On it's front was written, "Journal of Toerag, King of Poem."

It read:

"Today we set sail from Danderville, to find our enemies,
somewhere does that trio sail, upon these hate filled seas.
I've conned this crew of morons into believing that I am wise,
and that a man can live forever just from eating old french fries."

--

"Many days have passed for us, and no closer do we seem,
to finding Evil Baladeer, and living out my dream.
For surely one and all can see that to be the king of verse,
Balladeer head must be clouded with mighty blows from my purse.

The crew seems slightly wary of my actions as of late,
and they really took quite poorly to the Cod I chose to date.
The broke into my quarters late and stole my poor "Fishy"
How I miss his underbelly, always cold, and wet and squishy.

--

"Still more days have passed by now since we left the sweet, hard ground,
To the crew I read poems for laughter, but never once do hear a sound.
Perhaps my skills are not so great, and I have fooled myself complete
Now I only miss my mother, bless both her glass eye and swollen feet.

The crew right now is angry, no question of that fact
Upstairs, while I don makeup, they swear a solemn pack.
That if the food grows scarcer, then before their deaths are real,
my pimply ass on sandwiches shall be their final meal.

I fear I will stop writing as a noise grows louder now,
Someone pounding in my door and calling me a sow,
A large and hairy sailor, with teeth so milky white,
has started all the mayhem and taken the first bite."


--

These words were Toerag's final, and the book did solemnly close,
and the moral of this story should not be lost on friends or foes,

In case you did not get it, redundantly I quip,
for those in league with Toerag you should choose now to ABANDON SHIP!

------------------
Poetic Wheelbarrow
http://www.stormloader.com/poetwheel/den.html
ICQ: 44370408



[This message has been edited by Poetwheel (edited 08-10-99).]

© Copyright 1999 Poetwheel - All Rights Reserved
Sue
Member
since 1999-08-04
Posts 383
France
1 posted 1999-08-10 10:35 AM


I'd reply to this, but I can't see for laughing.
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
2 posted 1999-08-10 10:51 AM


A wonderful saga. Can't wait for the reply
JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
3 posted 1999-08-10 11:01 AM


So much ammunition here... I'll sit out the ensuing volley and just enjoy a well thought epic.

------------------
Dum spiro, spero
JP



Dragoness
Senior Member
since 1999-08-07
Posts 513

4 posted 1999-08-10 11:48 AM


This was too funny! Loved it!!

------------------
Set you heart free and your mind will follow.

Lucie
Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077
Houston
5 posted 1999-08-10 11:57 AM


Abandon ship you say??? "You jump, I jump right?" .. oh sorry wrong boat..haha..Love this story.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
6 posted 1999-08-10 12:23 PM


Poetwheel, I think you've found your own forum!

------------------
© KRJ
Sunshine
Words will always express our feelings true. ~~~ KRJ
Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
7 posted 1999-08-10 03:48 PM


Oh No, that simply isn't so...
No matter, it may seem -
All be assured once and for all
I AM this Forum's Queen..

So Poetwheel, and Balladeer
Toerag and LongJohn too,
Are sprightly jesters in my court,
The Entertainment Crew!!!




------------------
Nay, if our wits run the Wild-Goose chase, I am done:
For thou hast more of the Wild-Goose in one of thy wits,
Than I am sure I have in my whole five.
~ ²1592 Wm. Shakespeare ~ Romeo & Juliet ~ ii. iv. 75




[This message has been edited by Nan (edited 08-10-99).]

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
8 posted 1999-08-10 04:15 PM


Oh, poetwheel, you are the greatest!! You've sent those scurvy rats over the side for sure. Toerag will be able to command nothing more than a little dinghy! Well, well done, mate!! I'm working late tonight so you'll have to carry on for me but that is obviously no problem at all. Toerag may respond with some small ditty but that's all he is good for. Swat him like a fly!
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
9 posted 1999-08-10 11:23 PM


Poetwheel, I stand here in full salute. Masterful performance. Put Toerag back on his dinghy where he belongs! You are (sob) the best (choke) partner in rhyme (boo hoo) a man could ask for. Hearty congrats!!
Poetwheel
Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 208
Canada
10 posted 1999-08-11 07:14 AM


Thank you all, your comments of praise have unfurled my sails and, frankly, given me a swelled mast.

PW

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
11 posted 1999-08-11 07:44 AM


Poetwheel - you are truly a Mast-er of worddom. Your creativity is unmatched by most great white sharks and Man O' War I've had the occassion to meet. It's a shame that the nefarious Balladeer has hoodwinked you into becoming his minion, but I know it is not your fault (living on the streets could do this to ANY man).

Oh - I almost forgot - I loved every line.

ac
Member
since 1999-06-17
Posts 129
Cayey, PR - USA
12 posted 1999-08-11 10:01 AM


fascinating saga ... ate up line after line ... can't wait to see its TV version...meanwhile, can I buy the movie rights?....
Poetwheel
Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 208
Canada
13 posted 1999-08-11 02:27 PM


AC

You pose an interesting question. Who would star in this made for TV madness.

As for Basil I am seeing someone who can pull of a mix of Richard Moll's soft sensuality and Gary Coleman's stunning wit and dialogue.
PW

ac
Member
since 1999-06-17
Posts 129
Cayey, PR - USA
14 posted 1999-08-11 04:11 PM


why the original pirateers, ofcourse... Toerag, Balladeer and yourself...for only you three could be true to your art...i couldn't possibly think of anyone else...

who else would understand this madness...
who else could give it some class...
i'd have to admit without your finesse...
it would be as exciting as "gas"...


just remember the move rights thing...

i'll be watching....

Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
15 posted 1999-08-11 04:57 PM


If ever there were reason to create a forum named "Poetic Combat" these four would be most responsible. I would love to see all pertaining works gathered under one roof, much like the community poem piece. Quite enjoyable! Thank you one and all.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
16 posted 2004-04-30 06:00 PM


ah....those were the days
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