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Open Poetry #1
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Sue
Member
since 1999-08-04
Posts 383
France

0 posted 1999-08-04 04:33 AM


I see you in the dark, and in the light
you're in the very air
you fill my days, you're in my dreams at night
you're everywhere

I know your voice, each sweet familiar tone
and in the evening chill
and quiet night-time hours when I'm alone
I hear you still

I feel you, holding me against your heart
I hear your breathing there
but all you are, since we have been apart
is empty air

I feel you in the heat, and in the cold
you're in the sun and rain
you fill my life, with you I shall grow old
and with my pain

I see you in the dark, and in the light
you're in the very air
you fill my days, you're in my dreams at night
but you're not there



© Copyright 1999 Sue - All Rights Reserved
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
1 posted 1999-08-04 10:32 AM


Wow, that one is a tear jerker....very nicely written, the format works well for this piece, with the second and fourth line of each stanza being accented because of it's length.

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"Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald

Sue
Member
since 1999-08-04
Posts 383
France
2 posted 1999-08-11 10:23 AM


Thanks very much, Hoot.
I've brought this one forward again because it means a lot to me, and I would be very grateful for some more responses. I hope I will be forgiven.

Craig
Member
since 1999-06-10
Posts 444

3 posted 1999-08-11 04:25 PM




I waited a while, but I can not wait any longer....

Superb Poem and a fine job well done.

Now back to the top so the others can read it too.

Sue
Member
since 1999-08-04
Posts 383
France
4 posted 1999-08-12 03:21 AM


Craig, you are so kind, thank you very much.
angel girl
Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 322
within a whisper...
5 posted 1999-08-12 04:33 AM


Nice job. I can relate.

------------------
One touch of nature makes the whole world kin.
-William Shakespeare


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