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redwriter1
Member

since 1999-07-22

Posts 480
Franklin, TN

0 posted 1999-08-03 08:58 PM

(written when I was 15, my first actual finished piece of anything, but I still like it, tell me if you think I should make it into a song).. thanks

Through my mother's eyes were seen the days
of Christmas's gone by
When all her children came in haste
to gather by her side

No tree this year my little ones
she would apologize
Though we all hoped it wasn't true
Your mother doesn't lie

Through my mother's eyes was see a tree
with Christmas lights so bright
But it would need a little help
to make it look just right

It's not much, she said, but it will do
We'll have a Christmas tree
And it will be the best of all
You just wait and see

It was oddly shaped and very small
but beautiful indeed
Even thought our Christmas tree
was just a tumble weed

Though time went by and years between
I still recall the sighs
When we all saw a Christmas tree
Through my mother's eyes.

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Kay-lynn

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

1 posted 1999-08-03 09:03 PM

Absolutely wonderful!!! I loved this one, thanks for posting it. It really works and a song? quite possibly!

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"Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald

redwriter1
Member

since 1999-07-22

Posts 480
Franklin, TN

2 posted 1999-08-03 09:06 PM

I'm glad you like it. It's supposed to be a true story.. according to my mother.. and hey.. if you can't trust your mother who can you trust?? (smile)

but even if I don't remember being there, I still see the whole thing through her eyes.. the master story teller. ...

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

3 posted 1999-08-03 09:35 PM

Beautiful, Red. A heart-touching ballad that would make an excellent song, in my opinion.

redwriter1
Member

since 1999-07-22

Posts 480
Franklin, TN

4 posted 1999-08-03 09:46 PM

thank you Balladeer.. I was hoping. someone would read the ramblings of a 15 year old. Even though i'm now 36.. I re-read this often and think.. I can't believe I wrote that.!..you're very kind

elvira
Senior Member

since 1999-07-06

Posts 936
California

5 posted 1999-08-03 10:12 PM

lucky you saved your teen poetry, redwriter1...i didn't and still regret it...this was a lovely poem

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one night at the airport...Childhood Memories...your countenance...eight short weeks...My One and Only...Music to my Ears...hoarse whispers...just watching tv...Feel the need?...serving wench...Tribute to M.J....take a guess...sink or swim
...stolen hours...the mistress...Perfection...a little girl...Mr. Jones...life is like...insomnia...devotion...07-20-69...craving...
Master...chat?...apart...plain...vice...shameless self promotion

Delores Hall
Member

since 1999-07-16

Posts 342
USA

6 posted 1999-08-04 10:45 AM

Nice poem.At that age most kids can't see
thru their mothers eyes.As far as making it
a song.I don't know.If it's something you
want to do go for it.

graham
Member

since 1999-07-31

Posts 60
South Yorkshire, England

7 posted 1999-08-05 10:25 AM

The ability to see through anothers eyes is an amazing gift. To be able to write about that is truly wonderful. I loved it!

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