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Miscarriage of Justice
| Open Poetry #1 |
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Miscarriage of Justice |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
The walls of this room stare back at me, In a barren shade of white. Swollen eyes just barely let me see, through this haze of pain and spite. I lay curled in a ball on my side, hugging myself to keep warm. The only thing broken is my pride, fractured by this inner storm. I hear a mournful, heart-wrenching keen, filled with loss and hollow pain. I'm crying because I feel unclean, grief is better than disdain. I'm beaten, bruised, and torn up inside, by the one I love the most. I love him still, it can't be denied, though he treats me like a ghost. I know he didn't mean to hurt me, then again, he never does. He hits me with such horrendous glee, I ask why, he says, "Because." I'm trapped in the web of my own mind, from which I cannot escape. Doctors act as if I'm deaf and blind, as they talk about my rape. "My rape.", sounds as if I own it, like I bought it with sorrow. I can feel every place that he hit, it will feel worse tomorrow. Recalling disjointed yesterdays, I wonder where it began. One memory is so clear it stays, the day he asked for my hand. There was no warning to this madness, no single clue at all. My life suddenly filled with sadness, as between us sprang a wall. I have tried so hard to make it work, still we grew farther apart. All my friends told me to leave the jerk, I love him with all my heart. Doctors catalog my injuries, whispering each detail. They talk of my husband's perjuries, and of how he's now in jail. Replayed with a dispassionate eye, this beating comes back to me. Exhaling a disconnected sigh, I give in to the memory. This objective view brings no surprise, emotion clouds my mind. I see the fight through another's eyes, for my own are always blind. She feared it when her husband was kind, in that quiet, caring way. Worse than all the arguing combined, was when he wanted to play. They argued over nothing really, just about paying the bills. Just as she started to feel silly, his hardened grin gave her chills. From out of the blue, the first blow struck, a hard slap across the face. She has finally run out of luck, loving him is her disgrace. He knocks her down and takes her so rough, that she starts with racking sobs. He thinks beating on her makes him tough, spittle falls from him in blobs. Planting one last kick to her belly, he turns and walks out the door. Her battered body feels like jelly, as she crawls across the floor. As I come out of my reverie, myself I must disparage. Because, even with this misery, I want to save my marriage. Thinking about this makes me feel sick, frightened unsure and wary. I just know it was his final kick, that caused me to miscarry. ©1999 DreamEvil This is a true story, although edited for content. ------------------ Shall I indulge in flights of fancy hampered by clipped wings? DreamEvil© [This message has been edited by DreamEvil (edited 07-30-99).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 DreamEvil - All Rights Reserved | |||
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leelew Member
since 1999-07-10
Posts 89highmount,ny,usa |
I've seen thousands like this,wanting so badly to change that which will,or can't be changed.Blaming themselves for whats not there fault.And always forgiving their attacker...becuase they love too much and hope too much.Very well done, Dream. |
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Rita Member
since 1999-07-19
Posts 55Danville Va. 24540 |
very very good. puts a frown on my face....upset to hear that it happens everyday.....touching |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I cried as I read this one dream...this rings so vivdly clear to me. You took a terrible subject and portrayed it so dramaticly. It brought back a lot of very harsh memories for me. ------------------ "Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald |
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Gentle Soul Member
since 1999-07-12
Posts 273Vinton,Ohio USA |
This hits home with me DE.. I wasnt beat.. but my sister was.. tore me up inside and out.. I love your work Dream.. always will! *hugs* ------------------ Gënt£ë¤§°û£ |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
So painfully sad, Dream. Something all women fear, I think. Such a tragic thing, and it happens much to often.. ------------------ *Krista Knutson* "I will sail my vessel 'till the river runs dry, like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky..." Garth Brooks |
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CSwtThng Member
since 1999-07-28
Posts 124 |
Reading this gave me chiils. I only wish to become a writer like you. Your work is so vivid. It paints a picture of this broken woman in my mind. Your work is truly magnificent. |
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~one voice~ Senior Member
since 1999-07-08
Posts 664Billings, MT USA |
Dream, your talent grows each and every day. Each time you write something new, I am in awe, especially over this one. All I can say is Wow!!!  ------------------ ~onevoice~ "She looked at her life like lines, never-ending, constantly forming, reforming and bending." |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
This is another example of how you are progressing in your writing. It's a good poem! (a terrible subject though!)  |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
How can I say I like something when it gives me the chills... and an anger that such stories happen every day? I must echo Poet deVine... excellent poem on a terrible subject... great job! |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
While very sad, this is a true story. I'm glad that this piece has been greeted with outrage. |
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Emmy Member
since 1999-06-29
Posts 194KY |
This poem brought a tear to my eye and a pain to my heart...and amazement that such a terrible subject could be written about so well. I cry for all those who have to endure that like which the woman in your poem did; this one left me thinking Dream... thank you for sharing. |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
No problem, Emmy.I'm glad to share. |
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Valor~ Junior Member
since 1999-07-31
Posts 10 |
Women like myself, especially, feel these words deep in their soul, DreamEvil. The outer bruises heal in time, but the scars left inside haunt us for a lifetime. You have brought a hope of justice here for all the women that have been victims. Thank you, and excellent work! ------------------ Valor~ "Poetry is language as it is most distilled and most powerful." |
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thursdayschild Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 169Houston, Tx. |
Tragedy portrayed in such a profound manner. A difficult subject matter... Once again, must leave this number, hope you don't mind it under your poem: National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE(7233) |
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tori Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 520Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA |
Dream... This hits my heart stings.. there is a battered women's shelter I work with helping with cloths, and toy's for the children... the women's eyes express this exact emotion you have captured.. You have done a wonderful job... and I'm sorry this had to happen to someone you know or love ... as I am sorry violence is the way some people answer their pain.. makes you wish every one could feel the release that writting brings to us..... I am thinking ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ If with pen in hand I've made you think I've not wasted one drop of ink vlh |
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Abdul Lateef New Member
since 1999-07-29
Posts 9Centrevill, Va. ,USA |
For the short time I have been here I find your poetry to be extraordinarily well done. |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
This is a very difficult subject to write about, DE, and I agree that your work is improving. I can see that you've put some time into this and worked on it. I especially like the title! (Sometimes I had a little problem with the voice changing.... from the wife's "I", to the 3rd person "she", then back to the wife's first person "I" again.... perhaps you did that on purpose? To me it was a little confusing). I think it's an excellent exercise to place yourself in the woman's situation and speak from that voice to write about such a horrible subject. You captured the feelings well, despite the structure of going back and forth between 1st and 3rd person. Keep up the good work, DE. |
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Haskins Member
since 1999-06-26
Posts 85Dallas, TX |
Terrifically disturbing and brutally honest. I hope that writing the poem was cathartic for you, and that, rather than being a grotesque monument to your pain, it is a ticket through the darkness. ------------------ William Haskins AKA The Mad Monk http://www.ionstorm.com/public/haskins/inner_sanctum.htm |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
What to say! This was deeply touching, being one myself that has been in a situation like that. It brings to the surface anger. No woman deserves that/man either. You have done a wonderful job with such a painful subject. Keep up the good work, and God smile upon you! |
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azblond Senior Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 637The Steamy Desert |
what woman wouldn't feel the pain in this one...some of us more deeply from having lived it, others from the fear and loathing that such things can and do happen. A great perspective of a womans feelings Dream...Once more I applaud you. ------------------ For sometimes when the Darkness falls, we must surrender, take what is ours, and give what we can, and always remember love is somewhere waiting... |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
I'm glad this one has done well. Hopefully the message will be heard as well as read. |
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grandiloquent Member
since 1999-07-08
Posts 104Midwest America |
tears... I'm speechless, Dream. A beautiful script to a horrifying reality. |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
Well done Dream. May your voice be heard beyond these poetic walls, loud and clear for all to heed. Thanks for sharing and for tackling such a horid subject in a caring yet disturbing manner. You are a true talent. |
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JP Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343Loomis, CA |
Good work here DE. Though we have not seen eye to eye-you could change that you know. I like that you are growing as a poetic talent. Challenge yourself an move into a subject of ight. give it a shot and surprise yourself with what you really have inside. Nosce te ipsom JP |
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Crystal Member
since 1999-07-24
Posts 62Hazel Park Mi U.S.A. |
Very deep. Valor said it all. |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
Looks like the message is being heard,instead of the messenger, good. |
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blueloon Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 161NY |
I am having trouble with words to write...I can't see my screen clearly for the tears are rolling...You have given strength to women by writing these very words...Thank you. blueloon |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Tragic to realize that such things happen every day. But perhaps poignant stories such as this will help people to see. Well Written! ------------------ Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll be among the stars. -Unknown- |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
DreamEvil, I have read this three time now. This last time I was even fully awake. You have left me gasping for the right words to compliment this work. It's poignant, very powerful, and left a very sad aftertone. She almost seems to wear her blood as a testimonial to her heart. I have seen situations close to this in my life. this poem really hits home. Thanks for sharing such a "Dark" poem. Michael |
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juanita Member
since 1999-08-13
Posts 68Los Angeles, CA, USA |
Great work DE,i can say much i am still crying. |
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