slick with sweat
a gallon jug of tea ripening to honey
in the corner of the porch
Too hot for anything but
sticky red wings from the nearest bar
and a swiped 32 oz. of cheap beer
Sun-starved, giddy, pressing peace in like a bruise,
I feel the wink of nostalgia; the sudden bright hint of future passing early, if only
to cover today with hope...
These are the summers I asked for
when I wondered what came after the bliss of
long months at the pool, sunsets almost holy over the ballpark:
the rosy, golden calm --
drones of crickets and heybatterbatter with white moths circling the fluorescents,
nights still as death with my crown resting in the nest of my laced fingers - ancient stars reflected in the dark of my eyes.
What waited when something beyond the child inside called out to play?
Will I marry? Will I take my husband and our 3 postcard children to weeks
at the beach in North Carolina? Fighting over shovels in the sand with the kids; making love in the strange secret of 5 am; Laughing, Screaming, Loving.
Will I divorce and open the harsh desserts of Egypt with the tear of my hungry hands?
Run naked over the white soft shores of Greece?
or still sit still
watching tea turn over
Grain alcohol in one hand,
mind cascading in the other
Praying to keep the expectant beauty and optimism of a teenager
(its connected promising boredom)
or at least the tan on my legs.
[This message has been edited by grandiloquent (edited 07-31-99).]