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Passions in Poetry

Finally The Conclusion!! :)

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Newguy
Junior Member
since 06-27-99
Posts 36
Moultrie, GA, USA


0 posted 07-28-99 09:19 AM       View Profile for Newguy   Email Newguy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Newguy

Here is my original poem "The Black" that I wrote a few months ago (repost), followed by the finished 3rd part. I did this today.
PLEASE leave comments; this is my favorite series of poems that I have ever penned!
I want them to be GOOD.

The Black (The Beginning)

I open my eyes and enter the day,
The Black it starts stirring, it eats me away.
I bathe and I ponder what things come my way,
The Black it is stirring, it eats me away.
So I empty my mind and put a smile on my face,
Still the Black it engulfs me and without a trace,
I fade into sorrow, succumb to its grasp,
And I see it, I feel it, and I hear it laugh.
I'm helpless, I'm lost, I realize that now.
There is no escape from His all-encompassing brow.
So I cry and I suffer, shake my fists at the sky.
Wishing for the moment, the time that I'll die.
Still the Black it continues to destroy my soul,
Clouding my mind and taking control.
And I see it, I feel it, and I hear it laugh.
As He crushes my heart and tears me in half.
I wish it was gone, this creature of pain
Then parts of myself I could somehow regain.
I scream I shudder. I cry for the end.
Help me! Please help me! How have I sinned?
And I see it, I feel it, and I hear it laugh,
The Blackness of lonely, two torn in half.


The Black (The Struggle)

There once was so much, now there is none.
My life, my soul, and my world are undone.
The Black it still laughs, still swallows me whole.
But inside I'm stronger, I've regained control.
I glare at this monster which gives me such grief.
My God how I yearn for extended relief!
So I fight and I struggle, on this life's behalf,
I still see it, still feel it, and I still hear it laugh.
Empty I was, cold and so scared.
Yet something inside me continues to dare
To fight this beast, to win, to live
Though the Black is eternal, and takes what I give.
My battle, my growth, my soul's rebirth,
The Black and its power, its evil, its girth.
I still see it, still feel it, still hear it laugh,
But with strength beyond strength my spirit will last.
The Clash of the Titans, a life-altering event
The Black He surrounds, and now I am bent
On ending this darkness, ending his reign
With no pity or relent, I've so much to gain!
I still see it, still feel it, still hear it laugh,
This Blackness inside me, I'm broken in half.

And FINALLY, Part 3!

The Black (The Conclusion)

The war that has ravaged, torn through inside,
Now comes to an end, my heart now not tied.
He is still fighting, still clawing my mind
But I return what He throws, and more of its kind.
The immortal sense of being, the reaper of hearts,
Has destroyed me so long, too long, now I start
To fell the beast, to overcome His craft,
I can still see it, still feel it, and still hear it laugh.
Towards the future my mind it now turns
The struggles of past my mind it now burns.
The Black in his power, lasting, and size,
Has caused a holy power in me to arise,
The power of calm, the spirit to move on
The strength to be happy, the evil inside, now gone.
I can still see it, still feel it, still hear it laugh
Though finally, thank God, I face it and gaff!
I stab him with knowledge, pierce him with love
For that is the power, the white of the dove.
He is no longer the overpowering beast
Now there is no struggle, just beauty and peace.
I still see it, still feel it, still hear it laugh,
Now I am one, not two, or a half.
© Copyright 1999 Newguy - All Rights Reserved
Delores Hall
Member
since 07-16-99
Posts 358
USA


1 posted 07-28-99 11:07 AM       View Profile for Delores Hall   Email Delores Hall   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Delores Hall

This is wonderfully written.I like the way the story flows.Just one question though.Is
it the devil your'e fighting or a illness?
Newguy
Junior Member
since 06-27-99
Posts 36
Moultrie, GA, USA


2 posted 07-28-99 11:26 AM       View Profile for Newguy   Email Newguy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Newguy

Actually, the Black is lonliness.
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


3 posted 07-28-99 11:54 PM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

i like it new guy its tempo is great and the happy endin nails a perfect conclusion will be lookin for more from ya
 
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