How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #1 Archive
 Naked
 1 2 3
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Naked

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
blueloon
Member
since 07-07-99
Posts 166
NY


0 posted 07-18-99 12:15 PM       View Profile for blueloon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for blueloon

A window,
A window within a wall.
Outside the sun shines.
I gather the air is cold.
I sit here motionless and naked.
The outer world seemed naked too.
But, it is carefully painted by color.
How I wish my skin had color.

I blink...

The window is gone.
The wall stood tall.
The glass had fallen.
The air struck upon my face.
I walked to the window, naked.
I caught a glimpse of the outside.
I stood upon the cill
and started to learn forward.
Silently I floated down.

Again I blinked...

I never touched the ground.


[This message has been edited by blueloon (edited 07-22-99).]
© Copyright 1999 blueloon - All Rights Reserved
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 06-20-99
Posts 2589
Normal, Illinois


1 posted 07-18-99 01:51 PM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

mysteriously amused, very good you've captured my mind with this one.
blueloon
Member
since 07-07-99
Posts 166
NY


2 posted 07-22-99 03:09 PM       View Profile for blueloon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for blueloon

After editing this I realized there was something missing...I would love some feedback!
blueloon
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


3 posted 07-25-99 06:15 PM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

There's really nothing "missing", you just force the reader to use his/her imagination as to what exactly has happened here!! Very deep thoughts you have - and you forced me to think too!! It's so vague yet it's not. Stimulating...mentally.

------------------
- poet FemmeFatale

"The strongest man in the world is he who stands most alone..." Henrik Ibsen (1826-1906) Norwegian dramatist lyric poet

 
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #1 >> Naked Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors