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Passions in Poetry

Methuselah's Face

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wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


0 posted 07-11-99 02:53 AM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for wayoutwalt

My Methuselah's face
Dripping formaldehyde
And I can't leave this place
Until your satisfied

I'll never put much weight
Into this phenomenon
Just so you can create
Sure that you want me gone

Your desperate I live
I only live to die
And I cannot forgive
Not getting a try

Broken in stitches
Among this sadness
Burning the witches
Prolongs the madness

You feel the tissue
It's futility’s scar
Making you wish you
Hadn't taken so far

A lonely hearts dream
You can't hope to replace
One day you'll wake up
With Methuselah's face



[This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (edited 07-11-99).]
© Copyright 1999 Walt Burns - All Rights Reserved
DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


1 posted 07-11-99 04:20 AM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Great one, Walt. Keep reaching for the Darkness.

------------------
I am not responsible for how you choose to interpret what I say.
DreamEvil©


~one voice~
Senior Member
since 07-08-99
Posts 668
Billings, MT USA


2 posted 07-11-99 04:44 AM       View Profile for ~one voice~   Email ~one voice~   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ~one voice~

I love your style, walt! These dark ones always inspire me!

------------------
~one voice~

For Myself, I live,
Live intensely and am fed by life,
and my value, whatever it be, is in my own kind of expression of that. *Henry James
brockglaze
Junior Member
since 07-13-99
Posts 21
Muncie,Indiana,USA


3 posted 07-16-99 11:17 AM       View Profile for brockglaze   Email brockglaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for brockglaze

Nice, very nice, it makes you think!

------------------
Brock J. Glaze
Gentle Soul
Member
since 07-12-99
Posts 274
Vinton,Ohio USA


4 posted 07-16-99 11:30 AM       View Profile for Gentle Soul   Email Gentle Soul   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Gentle Soul

I like it! I wish I could develope a flow like that

------------------
Gėnt£ė¤§°ū£


quote99
Junior Member
since 07-14-99
Posts 18
US


5 posted 07-16-99 11:35 AM       View Profile for quote99   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for quote99

Am I crazy or is this poem way off in the meter and rhyme?

"Your desperate I live
I only live to die
And I cannot forgive
Not getting a try"

Can you explain what this means? I don't get it!!!!
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


6 posted 07-16-99 11:44 AM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

yes i have been guilty of bad meter here lately to this i apologize and will work diligently to correct thank you for the critique
 
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