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elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California

0 posted 1999-07-08 01:04 PM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

© Copyright 1999 elvira - All Rights Reserved
Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
1 posted 1999-07-08 02:07 PM


Once again, the faithful servant suffers for a better life that isn't hers. Do detect a theme? Well done, my lady.
Thanks for looking in on "A Soldier's Life," perhaps "Debut" would be more to your taste.

elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California
2 posted 1999-07-08 02:50 PM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California
3 posted 1999-07-09 08:14 PM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
4 posted 1999-07-09 09:39 PM


No, Elvira. Your poems are in the right forum. Don't you dare leave this forum!! I'll hunt you down and demand more!!!!!!
Aly
Junior Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 35

5 posted 1999-07-09 09:42 PM


I like it, very strong! It seemed like it needed to be finished though. I thinku should write more!


p.s.that's just my opinion

elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California
6 posted 1999-07-09 10:04 PM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California
7 posted 1999-07-09 10:10 PM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

CastleHoward
Junior Member
since 1999-07-12
Posts 20

8 posted 1999-07-27 05:06 AM


Disagreeing with Aly, I think it's nicely finished off: the whisper is a nice touch... And, who knows, perhaps the Master really does love that serving wench and just can't admit it... while she adores such worthy attention. You capture those stolen moments of love and admiration nicely, elvira
elvira
Senior Member
since 1999-07-06
Posts 936
California
9 posted 1999-07-27 06:57 AM




[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]

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