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Passions in Poetry

Voice

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Augchic711
Member
since 06-17-99
Posts 81
O'Fallon, IL, USA


0 posted 06-17-99 03:29 PM       View Profile for Augchic711   Email Augchic711   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Augchic711

I ask you that question,
hoping to receive no lies,
but your voice was truth enough.
You told me you cared
and not to worry,
things would be alright.

But our relationship kept growing,
and your voice did the same.
Each time I asked that question,
all I heard was that same voice.

It seemed eager for something
probably not the same as me
but I listened to those first words,
And again you said, "Don't worry,
everything will be alright."

But time passed, things happened,
and I proved you wrong
that your voice was truth enough.

You were full of deceit,
I was full of despair.
Your voice stopped saying "Don't worry."
And the last time I brought up
that question, hoping to receive
no lies, I found yet again
Your voice was truth enough.

Time has passed, and wounds have healed,
and now I know from my experience
Don't worry
Everything will be alright.
*******augchic711*******
© Copyright 1999 Augchic711 - All Rights Reserved
Fred Hobbs
Member
since 06-08-99
Posts 353
Tallahassee, Florida, US


1 posted 06-17-99 08:22 PM       View Profile for Fred Hobbs   Email Fred Hobbs   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Fred Hobbs's Home Page   View IP for Fred Hobbs

Another excellent job. You indeed have talent.
Augchic711
Member
since 06-17-99
Posts 81
O'Fallon, IL, USA


2 posted 06-18-99 02:37 AM       View Profile for Augchic711   Email Augchic711   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Augchic711

thank you fred your opinion means more to me than anyone could possibly understand-- thank you for your kind words!

*******augchic711*******
jfreak
Member
since 06-17-99
Posts 311
Yuma, AZ, USA


3 posted 06-18-99 06:02 AM       View Profile for jfreak   Email jfreak   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jfreak

good poem Augchic,

I just got one thing I feel I need to say.
I have this thing about rhythm, I feel all poems need it. Not exactly rhyme, just rhythm. Well you start well, but the middle gets a little jerky, then you pick it up again and finish great. I would just watch that if I were you. That is all. It is still a good poem and you DEFINATELY have talent. Keep up the great work.

jfreak
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


4 posted 06-18-99 01:21 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Augchic, you have described it perfectly. I've been there and you hit the nail on the head in every step. That last step is the biggie - realizing that things WILL be all right. You helped me relive an old memory. Thank you for doing it so well.
Genea
Member
since 06-15-99
Posts 325
USA


5 posted 06-18-99 04:40 PM       View Profile for Genea   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Genea

Augchic-
what a special poem! Thanks!
~Genea
Augchic711
Member
since 06-17-99
Posts 81
O'Fallon, IL, USA


6 posted 06-25-99 01:55 AM       View Profile for Augchic711   Email Augchic711   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Augchic711

Sorry for the delays on replying been busy at work! I appreciate everyones kind words they inspire me to continue writing and thank you for reading my work and sharing all of my experience I look forward to reading each of your poems!

*******Augchic711*******
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


7 posted 06-30-99 01:38 AM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

oh man i like this yes it gots some stuff i had to think about and memories it brought up yuh tiz whut good poetry means to me
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