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Nan
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

0 posted 1999-06-14 07:07 PM


How silly when considering
Directions taken lit'rally
From signs on doors. Interpreting
Could lend us mass insanity.

A visit to the hospital,
A shopping mall or grocery store -
Confuses my occipital,
Just heeding signs on ev'ry door.

This one says "In" and that one "Out"
I saw one sign that said "Third Floor."
And one "Revolving" - turned about
'Absurd' I thought - for that's a DOOR!'

While one says "Push" - the other "Pull"
We "Enter" here, - "No Entrance" there
"No Exit" - But our hands are full!
Perhaps we "Exit" by the "Stairs?"

"Automatic Doors, Beware" I see
Beware? - Do they attack sometimes?
And then there's "Personnel Only"
Of course, they're "Kept Closed at All Times"

"Electric Closet" - lights? not brooms?
"Employee's Lounge" - for coffee break?
And then, of course, the two "Restrooms"
But, how much resting can they take?

"The Nursing Station"!?! - Babes nursing?
The "Central Bath" - for all to share?
I see one that says "Housekeeping"
They keep a great big house in there? .... Geesh!!

"Utilities" - doors side by side
One sign says "Clean" the other "Soiled"
Why not just open both up wide?
The "Boiler Room" - where things are boiled?

The "Fire Doors" - which aren't aflame
And "Smoke Doors" - also clearly say
"No Smoking" here - the same door's claim;
Confusion reigns to my dismay.

I think that I would love to see
The manner chaos we'd suppose;
I just might laugh hysterically
If all those signs were juxtaposed!





[This message has been edited by Nan (edited 06-15-99).]

© Copyright 1999 Nancy Ness - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
1 posted 1999-06-14 07:13 PM


I am re-signed to the fact you are very, very clever. And such a wonderful title!
Ron
Administrator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-05-19
Posts 8669
Michigan, US
2 posted 1999-06-14 11:48 PM


Spoken like a true and devoted malapropist.

Delightful!


Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 1999-06-14 11:59 PM


DeSign is DeLightful! Thus spake deVine!
I 'yield' to you
come to a full 'stop'
glad to meet you
Ms. Malaprop!



[This message has been edited by Nan (edited 06-15-99).]

Fred Hobbs
Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 329
Tallahassee, Florida, US
4 posted 1999-06-15 04:19 PM


There is so much talent among the folks here on this page that it's scary.

Great one her imaginativeNess!

sandman

sea_of_okc
Senior Member
since 1999-06-15
Posts 568
Oklahoma City, OK, USA
5 posted 1999-06-15 04:58 PM


Too funny. Very ingenious and entertaining.
Genea
Member
since 1999-06-15
Posts 321
USA
6 posted 1999-07-31 10:12 AM


quite clever and enjoyable to read...deserves to be dusted off and read again by the masses.
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
7 posted 1999-07-31 10:26 AM


No wonder I stay confused! LOL.
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
8 posted 1999-07-31 10:47 AM


This poem seemed borne of confusion,
The way it talked about doors a lot.
"Nan's a blonde," is my only conclusion.
Show her the door? We'd better not!

For if we show her the egress,
And the door says, "Exit to Your Right."
Nan may think the door is needless,
Because the Egress are nowhere in sight.


Nan - I loved the way you described so many signs we take for granted, and in a humorous way at that!

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
9 posted 1999-07-31 10:58 AM


Signs that make doors and the world go 'round....LOL

I've seen some great ones too though....Saw one at a huge garden center once...all the plants and shrubs had all those "Latin" family names etc.,.....and on the way out, next to the payphone..read: "Paycoinus Telephonus".....saw one on a prophylactic machine in a mens room: "This is the worst chewing gum I've ever tasted".....And at the University where I teach....the Dean of Science had posted signs on all the mirrors over the sinks in the restrooms that read: THINK!...I took a magic marker...and wrote under it: Thoap!

RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023
United Kingdom
10 posted 1999-07-31 11:24 AM


Thanks for sharing the laughter..:-))

HUGS

------------------
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
11 posted 1999-07-31 12:51 PM


Thanks all.....
...um ....yes ..... I'm blonde...yep!!!!




Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
12 posted 2000-10-26 07:52 PM


He he he  

Elizabeth


You cling to your ways and leave mine to me.
Suum cuique.
~Elizabeth



Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
13 posted 2001-02-17 08:11 AM


SO much fun visiting the archives....why don't you dust this off and do a repost?
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