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Passions in Poetry

Doors

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suicidal dreams
Member
since 09-28-1999
Posts 345
Toledo Ohio USA


0 posted 09-28-1999 10:47 PM       View Profile for suicidal dreams   Email suicidal dreams   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for suicidal dreams

I open a door not knowing what lay beyond, be it pain, joy, or emptiness.
Sometimes I even find death.
So now when i open a door I open it slowly, cautiously and i survey the room.
The only problem with this is im only able to be somewhat more careful.

For once the door is opened it can never be shut or reentered.

------------------
life is short kill quick

[This message has been edited by suicidal dreams (edited 09-28-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Tom - All Rights Reserved
Systematic Decay
Senior Member
since 09-15-99
Posts 1312
That place with padded walls a


1 posted 09-28-1999 10:50 PM       View Profile for Systematic Decay   Email Systematic Decay   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Systematic Decay

Ok I think it was good, but i have one suggestion......

not to infringe on your style, but break up the lines a bit, especially the last one if no other.

------------------
"Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage."
-Billy Corgan-
 
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