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Passions in Poetry

Untitled (let me know what you think...)

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Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


0 posted 09-27-1999 11:15 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Forgive me God, I forgot how to pray
Meaningless dreams I come to envision
Love plays its role in your wonderful play
Mythical hero without a mission
Love’s open eyes in me find appealing
Uniqueness of faith and likeness of feeling


------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
© Copyright 1999 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved
Julie
Senior Member
since 08-20-99
Posts 742
Houston, TX


1 posted 09-28-1999 12:54 AM       View Profile for Julie   Email Julie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Julie

I really like the message here. Our spirits get lost sometimes...the only part I had trouble with was "Love's open in me find appealing". Either I didn't grasp that meaning or it didn't pull together as the rest...overall Good Work.

------------------
Julie
-------------------------
Thou who has given so much to me,
give one thing more: a grateful heart.
>George Herbert



MsLola
New Member
since 09-14-99
Posts 5
Campbell, CA


2 posted 09-28-1999 01:08 AM       View Profile for MsLola   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for MsLola

I like it...though found the 3rd line "Love plays its role in your wonderful play" awkward....with the 2 'plays'. I especially like the format....

Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


3 posted 09-28-1999 07:06 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks Julie and MsLola!
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


4 posted 09-28-1999 09:41 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Nice message Master...I enjoyed
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


5 posted 09-28-1999 03:27 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks Hoot!
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


6 posted 09-28-1999 06:03 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

However, I did like what you highlighted there. *Forgive Me Love-My Love's Uniqueness*
That was neat!

------------------
Cleaning your house while your kids are at home is like trying to shovel the driveway during a snowstorm.
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


7 posted 09-28-1999 09:50 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks WhiteDove, I'm planning to edit the body of the poem a bit... I'm not so sure I like it too much, but I love that line.
 
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