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Passions in Poetry

Balladeer's Rear

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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


0 posted 09-22-1999 12:00 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Toerag

When Balladeer was in his teens,
'round eighteen and a bit,
and long before they all wore jeans,
his pants would never fit.

Old LongJohn with flippant tongue,
said, "Deer ya got no butt,
not at all to hang them on,
them pants just won't stay up."

Balladeer felt so inferior,
because he only had,
a miniscule posterior
unfit for any lad

His pant seats hung in bumless shape,
and girls would rarely glance,
were he to ask them for a date,
in unfilled baggy pants.

He'd see some young macho guy
with pant seat amply packed,
and covet with an envious eye
the rearend that he lacked.

Now his rump is REALLY plump,
since fifty years have passed,
about the size of a large-car trunk,
And passes much more gas.

And now it seems the baggy shape,
is the modern dresser's passion,
But his ass is oh so great,
He still can't dress in fashion.

© Copyright 1999 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
Iloveit
Senior Member
since 09-02-99
Posts 1168
NM


1 posted 09-22-1999 12:05 PM       View Profile for Iloveit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Iloveit

lolol@still can't dress in fashion, but hey watch out there...I thought that's why they made those baggy pants with pleats...

great poem!
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


2 posted 09-22-1999 12:23 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Gee, seems to me I got stuck with the biggest ass around.....his name is Toerag.
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


3 posted 09-22-1999 12:26 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

And what a fine ass he is indeed!
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


4 posted 09-22-1999 12:28 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Hmmmmm, is Virgin Mary coming into this somewhere, you never can tell...*g*

HUSG

------------------
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


5 posted 09-22-1999 12:36 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Good one Toe! LOL Very Funny!!!

Have to admit Bally's wasn't bad either!! hehe
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


6 posted 09-22-1999 02:29 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Now yassee how he treats me! There was nothing sarcastic about my little poem, and it was all true...and still....he insists on being mean to me?....My feelings are hurt, my motivation has gone to hell to write anything else sweet about him and I'm just crushed. I try so hard to be complimentary about this sheeplover, and all I get in return is this? I just don't understand? That's okay though, I'll just turn the other cheek..(his sheep try that too but it does no good), I'll just go on, be my kind hearted self, and continue to attempt to me nice to this guy. I just don't understand some people...do ya all?
Justbleu
Member Elite
since 08-31-99
Posts 3430
Oregon, Originally From Alaska


7 posted 09-22-1999 04:31 PM       View Profile for Justbleu   Email Justbleu   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Justbleu's Home Page   View IP for Justbleu

Ouch Balladeer you got him good!!!
Toe now you don't think you deserved it??



Justbleu

------------------
"It may take a boy to turn a girl's head, but it takes a man to turn a girl's heart"


PhaerieChild
Senior Member
since 08-30-99
Posts 1829
Aloha, Oregon


8 posted 09-22-1999 04:35 PM       View Profile for PhaerieChild   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PhaerieChild

Well Toe...ya did it again. Just as I finally get over the laughing coniption that you always put me in you strike again without warning to all my funny bones. Thanks for the giggles..

------------------
What you hid from your parents as kids, you will hide from your kids as parents. ~Cletus T Judd~


Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


9 posted 09-22-1999 08:07 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Toe! You should be honored that Balladeer named his butt after you!!!!!
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


10 posted 09-22-1999 09:42 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Toe: You'd better watch which cheeks you turn towards Balladeer! LOL. His sheep might be out grazing somewhere, yanno! *EG* Great poem, sweets... and the smiles are so much appreciated!!
Rand al'Thor
Junior Member
since 09-19-99
Posts 32
Rochester, NY, USA


11 posted 09-23-1999 08:43 AM       View Profile for Rand al'Thor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rand al'Thor's Home Page   View IP for Rand al'Thor

Toerag, do you ever write poetry concerning anything other than Balladeer?

I would like to see some works that show who you are...

Granted, taking down Balladeer a few notches can be a noble endeavor, eventually you run out of notches . . .

------------------------------------------------
"They ought to make butt-flavored cat food." --Gallagher
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


12 posted 09-23-1999 10:01 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Rand....yep, I've written about some of the other folks too?...LOL....I don't write much serious stuff.....it mostly stinks worse than this stuff....I've written a few almost serious things if ya go back a few pages, and I've written a few on the Open Poetry #1. I guess I could run out of notches, and things to write about Balladeer in a year or two? I'll try something normal..or, let's say, as normal as a Toerag can possibly be!
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


13 posted 09-23-1999 10:41 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Toe: I dunno... *G* I somehow doubt you'll be running out of material to write about anytime soon... if Balladeer's belt can keep up with his ever-expanding girth, you're poetic talents can certainly keep up with his never-ending retaliations! LOL
 
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