I know funny bones can't be found back in the Meat Section,
But I can think of at least one alternate selection.
Over just one produce aisle, arrayed neatly on a slant,
Is the handiest veggie that I know, an aubergine Eggplant.
"What's so handy about an eggplant?" Your mind ponders on,
Is what Dreamie could do with one when cucumber season's gone.
He could stick large nails through it until it was all spiked,
Then use it for a backscratcher on those lonely nights.