How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #2 Archive
 I Lay Me Down
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

I Lay Me Down

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


0 posted 09-12-99 10:06 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

(I'm a little unsure about this one)

I Lay Me Down

Now I lay me down to sleep
In a lovers sleep tonight
I pray that in your arms you’ll keep
Me safe till morning light
And if you leave before I wake
My love it be not true
I pray my heart, with you, you take
For it belongs to you

------------------
"The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anais Nin



[This message has been edited by hoot_owl_rn (edited 09-13-99).]
© Copyright 1999 Ruth Kephart - All Rights Reserved
johnt300
Member
since 09-12-99
Posts 215
san diego, ca.


1 posted 09-12-99 10:09 PM       View Profile for johnt300   Email johnt300   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for johnt300

Very nice poem. Very sensual and nicely constructed within the prayer. Thanks again.
Tyson
IsabelleSkye
Member
since 06-27-99
Posts 262


2 posted 09-12-99 10:12 PM       View Profile for IsabelleSkye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for IsabelleSkye

*sigh*
this was wonderful
I.Skye
Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
3 posted 09-12-99 10:12 PM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

lovely

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


4 posted 09-12-99 10:13 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

What do you mean, you're unsure? I love it.

------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


5 posted 09-12-99 10:30 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Very sweet!

------------------
Denise
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


6 posted 09-12-99 10:55 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Hoot, you don't know about this one???

Very nice it is! Nice touch to a prayer!
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


7 posted 09-13-99 12:00 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

This is nice! Just a few suggestions, the line "Disappearing like morning dew" breaks the rhythm a bit. And also, take away the word "now" in the last line, it will flow a bit better. (just a suggestion) Great poem! I'm becoming a fan of your work.
Angel Rand
Member
since 09-04-99
Posts 140
London UK, and Zurich Switzerl


8 posted 09-13-99 12:16 AM       View Profile for Angel Rand   Email Angel Rand   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Angel Rand

Oh my gosh Hoot!! This is sooo beautiful!
Ty!
Angel
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


9 posted 09-13-99 08:38 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Thank you all for your response to this, I almost didn't post it, but rather put it with the stack of work that I think I'll get back to someday because I don't really like the way they turned out, but as time passes, the stack only grows. I wrote this in the car yesterday while driving and almost threw it out actually. So thanks for making me take a second look.

Master, I appreciate the suggestions thank you!

------------------
"The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anais Nin
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


10 posted 09-13-99 04:11 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Personally I like the flow much better! *S*
Iloveit
Senior Member
since 09-02-99
Posts 1168
NM


11 posted 09-13-99 04:50 PM       View Profile for Iloveit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Iloveit

well, I didn't get the before and after versions, but loved what I read, beautiful!
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 07-23-99
Posts 3654
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion


12 posted 09-13-99 04:57 PM       View Profile for LngJhnAg   Email LngJhnAg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LngJhnAg

The woman I passed in the next car,
Was weaving from side to side.
I figured she wouldn't get very far,
With the poetry she was trying to write.

She ran three cyclists off the road,
As she pondered the next line or two.
Then she sideswiped a truck with load,
As she decided her poem was through.

And then she stacked her new lines,
Upon a stack of other poems,
Waved at all of the motorist hand signs,
As she continued on to her home.

She is the wandering poetess,
And she's a terror on the street.
Her name is the lovely Hootess,
And she's the gal we want to meet.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


13 posted 09-13-99 05:11 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Thanks Master and Iloveit

Long John...I am a careful driver...have learned well the art of writing and driving at the same time. Isn't that what they created the airbags on the steering wheel for....to be used as desktops while driving Thanks for your rhyme...it made me smile!!

------------------
"This world is not conclusion.
A sequel stands beyond,
Invisable as music,
But positive as sound."
~Emily Dickinson
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


14 posted 09-13-99 05:57 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

I like the new version Hoot! (you did edit it didn't you?) Anyway, once again, it's beautiful.

------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."

Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 06-24-99
Posts 2655
Redlands,CA,USA


15 posted 09-13-99 07:04 PM       View Profile for Andrew Scott   Email Andrew Scott   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Andrew Scott

Lady Hoot: Simple and lovely! Glad you chose to share.
Angel_of_Music
Junior Member
since 07-25-99
Posts 36
Sanger, TX USA


16 posted 09-13-99 07:16 PM       View Profile for Angel_of_Music   Email Angel_of_Music   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Angel_of_Music

me too, it was beautiful

------------------
"In sleep he sang to me...in dreams he came...that voice which calls to me, and speaks my name..."
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


17 posted 09-13-99 10:19 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Thank you all

Yes Elizabeth, it is edited

------------------
"This world is not conclusion.
A sequel stands beyond,
Invisable as music,
But positive as sound."
~Emily Dickinson
hoot_owl_rn will be notified of replies
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #2 >> I Lay Me Down Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors