How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #2 Archive
 The clocks in whirlpools spin the hours.
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

The clocks in whirlpools spin the hours...

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


0 posted 09-12-99 01:05 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

The clocks in whirlpool spin the hours
My heart is drowning in this flood
I hear the whispers from the flowers
“She loves you not, she loves you not”

My pen is leaking on the paper
The ink just flows into a dot
I hear the whispers growing greater
“She loves you not, she loves you not”

I’m having problems simply breathing
There’s a virus in my blood
The stubborn flowers keep repeating
“She loves you not, she loves you not”

But here we are, she stands beside me
And in her eyes I see enough
I hear a voice which cries inside me
“I found my love, I found my love”


------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
© Copyright 1999 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


1 posted 09-12-99 01:21 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Another nicely done piece of poetry Master, although I have come to expect nothing less when I see your name presented. Interesting couple of lines here...although it would be hard for me by far to narrow down which lines I liked the best in this one...these two, by far, are the most intriguing
"The clocks in whirlpool spin the hours
My heart is drowning in this flood"
The Image of time flying past so fast that the hands on the clock liken themselves to a whirlpool and then you carry over that theme of the whirlpool (hence water) into the next line by saying "drowning in the flood". Masterfully done!!!


------------------
"The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anais Nin
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


2 posted 09-12-99 02:29 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Stop Hoot, I'm blushing! I enjoy your work also.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


3 posted 09-12-99 10:37 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Thanks Master...Shall I call the first meeting of the mututal admiration society to order

------------------
"The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anais Nin
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


4 posted 09-12-99 11:35 AM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

You do that... thanks Hoot!
Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
5 posted 09-12-99 11:51 AM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

you have another admirerer Master...I look forward to all your pieces...aother beautiul poem , well written

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


6 posted 09-12-99 12:05 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

This is very good! I like the reuse of that one line - very effective.
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


7 posted 09-12-99 01:49 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks Pepper and Poet! I'm glad you liked it.

------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


8 posted 09-12-99 02:07 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

A very captivating piece, indeed! Well done!

------------------
Denise
Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


9 posted 09-12-99 02:15 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks Denise, I appreciatte your comments.

------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


10 posted 09-12-99 10:19 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

Another great one, Master! A nice happy ending...

------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."

Master
Senior Member
since 08-18-99
Posts 1880
Boston, MA


11 posted 09-12-99 11:56 PM       View Profile for Master   Email Master   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Master's Home Page   View IP for Master

Thanks Elizabeth, and I love happy endings.

------------------
I fell in love and kept on falling
 
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #2 >> The clocks in whirlpools spin the hours. Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors