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Passions in Poetry

A Life Betrayed

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Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


0 posted 09-09-99 08:50 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Denise

You were cold and strange - a place unknown
So unlike that place he called his own;
Not a hint of 'him' in any room
Yes, strange indeed - your rooms of gloom;
Just as though he had not ever been
Your soul, your heart that beat within
No, his presence was not anywhere
Ev'ry bit of 'him' was ravaged there;
His essence sold - or just thrown away
Yes, cold indeed - that winter day
A place of gloom - a granite tomb
Not a hint of 'him' in any room.

...Another piece of us died that day.

...

Oh, I wept too - on that winter day
When his essence was just wrenched away
For he was my soul - the heart of me
That beat within - yes I agree
Yes, his presence had filled ev'ry room
Now I'm just a shell - rooms of gloom
Just a granite tomb - a place decayed
For my heart and soul have been betrayed
Yes, I cried too that winter day
When my soul, my heart were ripped away
Yes, ev'ry bit of 'him' ravaged there;
Not a hint of 'him' - left anywhere.

...Yes, I cried too and I died that day.

© Copyright 1999 Denise - All Rights Reserved
stoney1
Junior Member
since 09-09-99
Posts 12
Wooster, Ohio, Wayne


1 posted 09-09-99 09:54 PM       View Profile for stoney1   Email stoney1   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for stoney1

Very good piece. I sometimes feel the same way. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am glad that I found this site. You and many others have inspired me to write again, Thank you.

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Harold Amstutz
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


2 posted 09-09-99 10:07 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Another nice piece from you Denise

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"Nobody has measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold" ~Zelda Fitzgerald
Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
3 posted 09-09-99 10:10 PM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

Denise, so sad and so beautifully written.....

------------------

May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


4 posted 09-09-99 10:13 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Gee, another great poem from Denise. They're so hard to find....they only exist in everything she writes. Excellent, once again..and, yes, you ARE brilliant.
susieQ_luccier
New Member
since 09-09-99
Posts 9
central illinois


5 posted 09-09-99 11:06 PM       View Profile for susieQ_luccier   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for susieQ_luccier

very good denise ! I could relate to this poem. thank you!
DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 06-22-99
Posts 2442


6 posted 09-10-99 08:56 AM       View Profile for DreamEvil   Email DreamEvil   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit DreamEvil's Home Page   View IP for DreamEvil

Excellent verse, my dear. I thank you for sharing.

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Pain is life, life is short, I will endure.
DreamEvilŠ


WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


7 posted 09-10-99 10:26 AM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Ditto above, above, above! Well done!
Julie
Senior Member
since 08-20-99
Posts 742
Houston, TX


8 posted 09-10-99 06:07 PM       View Profile for Julie   Email Julie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Julie

Beautifully versed! It is sad when a person
we love disappears as you described.

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Julie
-------------------------
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
Marianne Williamson
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


9 posted 09-10-99 06:40 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I'm so glad that I have someone to share my poems with! And I'm especially glad that you enjoy them! Thanks again!

------------------
Denise
caroline
Senior Member
since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


10 posted 09-10-99 07:16 PM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

How I wish I could get my poetry to flow the way yours does! You write brilliantly D!

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The only man worth your tears will never make you cry...
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


11 posted 09-10-99 07:42 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Caroline, you are so kind! Thank you so much! I find that when I try to write something, I usually make a quick mess of it. Most of what I have written came out of deep emotional distress and I had to write or -BURST! Maybe that has something to do with it, I don't know. But I am truly grateful for your reading them and your kind comments!

------------------
Denise
Angel Rand
Member
since 09-04-99
Posts 140
London UK, and Zurich Switzerl


12 posted 09-10-99 09:32 PM       View Profile for Angel Rand   Email Angel Rand   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Angel Rand

Wow!! I soooo can relate to this!! Hope you feel better... in my case there is always that "room" inside. I keep it locked but sometimes it just bursts open on me...
But it's comforting to know I am not the only one like that. TY for sharing!
Angel
Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


13 posted 09-10-99 10:05 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you Angel. I'm glad that you liked it!
I wrote this after my dad passed away. This was my impression of going to his house after the funeral. I have lost loved ones before, but this was very different. When my mom passed away, we felt her 'essence' in the house for months afterwards. This time, there was nothing. Everything of 'him' was already sold or thrown away by the time us kids got there. (right after the funeral) I'll never understand it as long as I live, but,yes,the pain is not as strong as it was last year. Sorry, I didn't mean to ramble!
Thanks again for reading and commenting! It is very much appreciated!

------------------
Denise
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
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Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


14 posted 09-10-99 10:41 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

Another great one, Denise. Geez, why do I always seem to reply after you've thanked everyone? Oh well, anyway it was very well written and very very emotional. It is fitting for all of those who have lost a loved one.

------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."

Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


15 posted 09-10-99 10:45 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thanks Elizabeth. This is one of my 'heartbreak' pieces that we spoke of last week. I'm glad you're not sorry that you said you'd like to see some of them!

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Denise
Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


16 posted 09-10-99 11:07 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

'Course not! If you don't mind reading my poetry, I am more than happy to read yours!


------------------
*Elizabeth*

"Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low,
But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..."

 
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