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rad802
Member
since 2008-04-19
Posts 279
KY U.S.A.

0 posted 2009-08-09 09:25 AM


This is a "nightmare scenario story" and is not intended to insight hostilities of any kind by anyone at anytime.
All men should live in peace with one another whenever possible.
Rick Delmonico

The sun was gone even though it would only take about eight minutes to reach him, it could not penetrate a thousand feet of earth. Kwarry would never see the sun again but he hoped his grandchildren would.

You had to earn your place in the sun. If your were not born in the sunshine, you might never see it.
Kwarry had seen the sun once, it was only for a moment. He had held an important position with the cabling crew when he was young. He had seen the beautiful people enjoying their privilege. He had seen the tall glass buildings. He wished now that he had never seen them, the visions haunted him.

There was a time when people were not sent underground simply because of their strata in society. There was a time when you had to commit a very serious crime in order to condemn yourself to a lifetime in this hell. He remembered hearing stories about Australia being a prison colony. This made him smile.

After all this time, people had not really changed at all. All of the same problems were still plaguing mankind and he thought to himself, if the powers that be are so smart, why had they left themselves vulnerable to destruction by the very people they count on to run their infrastructure?
They had forgotten how easy it was to build a nuclear device. They had forgotten where they had put all of the spent fuel. But there were those who could not forget because every day they were reminded of their fate and enough time had passed to do something about it.

How arrogant to think that they were better than everyone else simply because they had been born into the upper strata of society. How arrogant to think that only they deserved the sunshine. The idea that reversing the population explosion would be the best way to preserve the habitats of the world had been abandoned if favor of creating a class system that could exploit the situation. Human nature being what it is, nothing had changed.

Kwarry was determined to change something, anything was better than this. Years had dragged into years of nothing but darkness and more darkness but now he had seen the light. The whole group was in agreement. It was time to take down the system and start again. This was not revolution, they intended to turn over the soil so that a new harvest could be realized. There would be survivors, but only the strong would survive, not the rich.

His moment had arrived, would he decide to change everything or would he allow things to continue as they had been for so long, in the darkness, perhaps forever. He reached for the panel he could not see. Darkness, darkness, and then light.

A worthy legacy is the irrevocable consequence of dreaming.
Rick A. Delmonico




© Copyright 2009 RAD802 - All Rights Reserved
fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

1 posted 2009-08-14 06:03 PM


I'm not sure I see what's so offensive about this story.  It looks more like a tale of someone wanting to escape an oppression of some kind.  You might like to elaborate a bit more on this story.  Also, the image of the lower classes being underground is vaguely reminiscent of HG Well's the Time Machine.  Are you trying to evoke elements from his story?

Life's short.  Think hard!
Me!

rad802
Member
since 2008-04-19
Posts 279
KY U.S.A.
2 posted 2009-08-14 07:43 PM


This was for practice. Thanks for reading and commenting. I wanted to add a social commentary.
Look up the "L curve".
I wrote the very end first. And so, I wanted to write a short story that would end with "Darkness, darkness, and then light".
I actually got in trouble at work for telling someone that if one of the other co-workers messes with my food, I am going to hurt them.
Well, I got called into the front office and chewed out for threating Ed.
Even though I was not really serious.
Because I do not know who might be reading my stuff, I am being cautious.

(from wikipedia)
The story reflects Wells's own socialist political views and the contemporary angst about industrial relations. Other science fiction works of the period, including Edward Bellamy's Looking Backward, and the later Metropolis, dealt with similar themes.

Later in the dark, he is approached menacingly by the Morlocks, pale, apelike people who live in darkness underground, where he discovers the machinery and industry that makes the above-ground paradise possible. He alters his theory, speculating that the human race has evolved into two species: the leisured classes have become the ineffectual Eloi, and the downtrodden working classes have become the brutish light-fearing Morlocks. Deducing that the Morlocks have taken his time machine, he explores the Morlock tunnels, learning that they feed on the Eloi. His revised analysis is that their relationship is not one of lords and servants but of livestock and ranchers, and with no real challenges facing either species. They have both lost the intelligence and character of Man at its peak.


A worthy legacy is the irrevocable consequence of dreaming.
Rick A. Delmonico

[This message has been edited by rad802 (08-15-2009 09:59 AM).]

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