navwin » Main Forums » Passions in Prose » Prose Noir
Passions in Prose
Post A Reply Post New Topic Prose Noir Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Ringo
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684
Saluting with misty eyes

0 posted 2007-10-26 01:47 AM


I happened to cop the opening 2 lines for this from (I think) Icebox from a challenge many moons ago, and kept it, hoping it would do me some good one day. Well, tonight, it popped back into my life, and I decided to use it to break my dry spell here on the blue pages. Thanks to the inspiration for the lines to bring it all back.

The City’s skyline mocked me. Bright lights and concrete, 2 AM, I need a drink. I wandered down the block to the local all-night tavern, thinking that I might find some solace from the thoughts that have been haunting me. Thoughts of  days gone by, thoughts of the people who have passed through my life, thoughts of her. She wasn't just another woman. She was the one for me, and that made all the difference.
As I stepped in out of the lights, and into the smokey haze of the timeless atmosphere that is The Joint, I happened to spy her sitting in the corner booth, holding court over the flunky's swimming around her wake hoping for whatever scraps she might give off. Terrific, I thought to myself, four million broads in the naked City, and I had to run into her on the one night of restlessness I encounter this month. Who am I kidding. It was the one restless night I had this week, and it was only Sunday.
I sauntered up to the bar and ordered my usual: Scotch, neat. Double Malt with the smokey flavor of peat, straight from a small home-distill out of Dumferling. Oh, Jesus, I had become a commercial. I stood there thinking of finding my way back to the hotel, having finished two more than I had come in for, when she made her way through the bar towards me. Although I saw her move through the mirror behind the bar, I was still slightly surprised. It wasn't that far, and she was able to cross the distance in half a dozen steps. Trouble was, her perfume made it in half that time.
Just as the scent of jasmine and lilac surrounded me, I turned to meet her head on. That was my style: recognize the warning signs and meet trouble face to face. We stood there, silent, gazing into the eyes of the only people we had ever truly loved. Longing for the first move to be made, as not to face the rejectioin we both felt after all these years apart. Yes, the desire was still there. For her, for me, for the both of us. Well, that was never the problem. All we had was love, and she could never be with a shlub like me. She needed more. She needed the things the bright lights of the City could bring her.
I nodded to her, turned to throw back the last of my drink, and looked into the mirror at her. She was still surrounded by the ever hopeful planets to her sun. Recognizing the dream for what it was, I pushed the bartender a fin, wrapped my coat around me, and- pulling my hat over my eyes- stepped back into the anonymity of the City to wind my way home.


What would you attempt to do...if you knew you could not fail?. www.myspace.com/mindlesspoet

© Copyright 2007 Bradly Stott - All Rights Reserved
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
1 posted 2007-10-26 04:34 PM


Enjoyed...James
Verg
Member
since 2007-10-25
Posts 52
Colorado
2 posted 2007-10-26 06:52 PM


I'm just a teenager and I dont quite understand the meaning of prose. So could you enlighten me.
Ringo
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684
Saluting with misty eyes
3 posted 2007-10-26 07:46 PM


I would be honored to assist you in your learning about writing in whatever little manner I can.

Prose is very simple: Have you ever read a story? A novel? An article in a magazine? That is all prose. It is putting words together in sentances to make a story.

Anyone else have a better explaination for this young writer?

What would you attempt to do...if you knew you could not fail?.
www.myspace.com/mindlesspoet

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2007-10-30 09:37 AM


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prose

One of the better explanations of prose...

and Ringo?

Write on, m'friend. I so enjoyed this!


Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Main Forums » Passions in Prose » Prose Noir

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary