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Against Our Will
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Against Our Will |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States 
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Against Our Will By Larry Chadwick As it turns out our heart’s desires are often understood by first seeing the antithesis. It is from darkness that we most appreciate the light. In days of continuous rain we learn to long for and better appreciate sunshine. Often in poverty what we learn to appreciate not, so much, wealth but the lack of poverty. Just like in the experience of a divorce we grow to miss sharing life with another. Similarly through pain we learn to appreciate the lack of pain. Taking things for granted becomes a common malady. We grow comfortable and perhaps even complacent in accepting what we grow to expect routinely. Yet life is anything but routine. It is only a matter of time before we learn to appreciate what we have. Sadly not because of our inherent wisdom but because of loss. And loss has the potential, ironically, to bring us wisdom. The loss of freedom. The loss of health. The loss of money. The loss of possessions. The loss of love. The loss of employment. The loss of hope. And in all our loss, we learn. But what we learn depends entirely on our choices. Many who lose freedom learn the state is a reliable provider. Many who lose health learn they get a lot of attention being sick. Many who lose money learn that there are agencies willing to give…and give… and give. Many who lose possessions learn to give up. Many who lose love learn to hate. Many who lose jobs simply give up. Many who lose hope learn despair. The potential lessons in loss could be so different. Many who lose freedom learn endurance and determination. Many who lose health learn compassion and understanding. Many who lose money learn possessions are not what matter. Many who lose love learn what empathy means. Many who lose jobs learn to create opportunities. And many who lose hope learn what friendship is for. But what do you learn when you lose a child? More than we dreamed of, even in our night mares. But mostly we learn what we are truly made of. I learned that I loved my daughter more than I even imagined. I learned I missed her exactly as much as I thought I would. I learned the ultimate value of friendship and family. I learned precisely the value of my faith and hope. I learned, from my son, the value of courage and perspective. I learned death has little impact on a bitter heart. I learned there are things worse than death. I confirmed that my own death was not my greatest fear and ultimately I learned I do not fear my own death. I learned that habits are not really altered by loss. I learned that time does not diminish love. I learned loss is not something you get over but rather something you accept. I learned how unaware I was of other’s loss. I learned how much difference I made to others. I learned the value of introspection. I learned a broken heart that mends was still broken. I learned that we can find the impact of a life in others…if we look for it. I learned tears can heal. I learned rain can soothe. I learned that virtually everyday loss will continue to instruct and that there is joy in wisdom. March 2, 2005 If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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| © Copyright 2005 Larry Chadwick - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Oh Larry, this touches me...deeply... *heart hugs*  |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Unforunately you are so right, a broken heart mended is still very much broken, we just carry it more gently don't we? This aches but also overflows with the knowledge ones gains through a loss. I still could never even begin to put myself in your shoes and feel the pinch.  |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Remember what I said about how I could learn a lot from you? You just proved me right. Finding the joy in wisdom... that one is difficult. But yes, every day it instructs more and more. And you hit it right on that with pain we appreciate not just feeling good, but we appreciate not feeling the pain. This write is full of growth, wisdom, and love. God bless you, sir Always, Alyssa He was a man of sorrows |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
I learned so much reading your words tonight Larry. Thank you Maree  and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
So wise...but what a price. A sad, deep, and wonderful write. Love's a lovely lad |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Susan, I wasn't sure anyone wanted to read this dark ramble. Thanks so very much. Ah dear Sharon, It is more likely that you could but would rather not. Which is no flaw at all. How I adore you. Thank you. Alyssa sweet girl, How you bless my heart. It's much fun knowing such young wisdom in you. Thank you. Maree, Thank you kind friend. I am so pleased you are willing to read my rambles. Erica, It means much that you are willing to understand. Thank you. And don't you owe us a prose piece, hugh? If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice writing...James |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Thanks James...nice to see you. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
I love you for sharing so much. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
love your introspective thinking, Larry! It's good to read your prose again. cathy |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Larry, your voice should be heard by those that suffer the same loss as you suffered. Send this to a magazine to be published...you can help millions of people with your wise words.  |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
Larry, I posed one a bit ago but nobody replied  Love's a lovely lad |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Susan, Wow! Thanks that was very kind. Cathy, Thanks dear lady, tons. Sharon, How are you sweet lady? And thank you for such generous words! I've got several things I am interested in publishing. My inexperience doesn't help but when I get back online at home I'll put some effort into it. And again thanks. Erica, I asked for that egg on my face. I peeked at that piece and struggled, again, with the subject matter. But if people are going to be so generous and read my dark stuff I should buck up! I promise that next week (I gotta run, right now) I'll read it. After all I do love your writing.  If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Good Lord, Larry . . . what you have written has taught me so much, has made me feel safe, has frightened me, has prepared me for things which may come, has taught me a lot about myself and those I love and most importantly, has once again, shown your beautiful loving heart. This is a beautiful piece of YOU. Thank you for always lighting the way for those of us that have yet to stumble along certain paths. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
lw, Well now that is incredibly kind of you. You strengthen me with your encouragement and I so appreciate it. Thanks. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
Time for a boost up for this one. |
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Mick Hawkes Member
since 2000-10-26
Posts 90Tees-side , England |
this certainly does not need a boost for those of us who read it first time out .... it got etched in our minds!.. as im sure will happen to those who now read this for the first time!... Never take life too seriously - None of us gets out alive! |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
MartyJo, Thank you dear lady. Mick, I am incredibly humbled by your kind words. Words escape me except to thank you for being so generous. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, |
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gyrl_blue Junior Member
since 2006-06-15
Posts 20Stuck In Reality |
Thank you for sharing some wisdom, a lot of what you've written I needed to hear. Thank you |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
gyrl_blue, Welcome to Passions! I am flattered to be among your first posts. I hope you love it here half as much as I do. I look forward to reading your writing. Hope you write some prose too. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, |
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
Wow.. Larry... this was wonderful. This gave me such a different outlook on life. Amazingly captivating. *tear* I guess when different people read this they can most likely relate it to their life or learn something new. I did both. Great job.. I hope to hear much more from you.. going in my library.  ~Heather~ Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Heather, You are incredibly kind indeed. And thank you for that. It is pleasing to know what we have learned can impact more than just our own lives. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
I'm sorry I missed this before... |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Rhonda, Thanks! And I've missed you. I appreciate the read.  If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, |
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