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Dear Lackey...
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Dear Lackey... |
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Melodious_silence Junior Member
since 2004-01-05
Posts 37 |
In the sunlight we lazily lay on the freshly cut grass. I see you in my mind and this is where you are with me. I remember getting the news that you, my childhood friend, has passed away. I sat at the kitchen table staring down at my hands, tracint the lines with my eyes and keeping to myself in silent shock of misery. I could feel my mother's eyes boring into me, asking me how i felt. I did not answer her, my dear Love, I only nodded and retreated to my room finding that I could not cry. I simply could not believe your death. I curled up on the bed and closed my eyes. I remember those kids that threw rocks at you and you were good to not fight back. You moved up the steps and sulked on the porch. I touched your back gently then kissed your head. I moved inside to tell my mother who took off down the street immediately with my father in the car cursing at the horrible boys that tried to hurt you. I am sorry I didn't walk wiht you more often. I grew older and became busy. I savored those walks we did have. I could talk to you freely about anything. And now you are not there to share my feelings with. I next day I didn't have much time to mourn over you. But I did mourn that Friday when I sat in the bandroom already in my fresh-clean, black and red uniform. I listened to fellow percussionists bang on their drums and laugh hysterically at whatever had held their amusement. But I sat back against the wall pulling my hat over my head and leaning forward. I did not want to ruin their fun. Streams of lost love ran down my cheeks blurring the vision of my feet held neatly in polished band shoes. I miss you so horribly. my mother's words continue to echo in the emptiness of my mind: "He just couldn't get back up," she said softly taking my hand which i drew slowly away from her. "He was laying in his own filth. When he did not come to the door after a half hour your dad got worried and wnet to check on him. 'Paralyzed', they said." I thought of this and held my arms tighter trying to prevent myself from shaking. I did not want anyone to see my red eyes and the masscara and eyeliner coursing down my cheeks in heavy black streams. A hand touched my shoulder and I looked up into my sister's eyes. "Do you remember," she said smiling softly as she took a seat next to me, "when I baked all of those cookes for Dad and Sandy and left them sitting on the counter?" I grinned and nodded, wiping my tears with the backs of my hands, blackening them. "I just walked in the kitchen and the container was empty with Lackey hovering over it innocently!" We both laughed. "All those cookies," she said smiling as she sighed and shook her head. We all had grand times with you. I remember how much fun you had trick-or-treating with us. How you adored your batman costume! And the leftovers given to you during the holidays and every day inbetween. Mom would complain with a hint of a smile on her face as she reached under the couch to get her plates back that you would shove under there. Your favorite was peanut butter. Dad took your death the worst, we didn't visit for months because Dad didn't want us to see him cry. When we finally did visit, he took us back into his room. Your pillows and blankets still strewn next to his side of the bed. He set his hand on a new piece of furniture. He had you cremated. "He never liked to be outside for very long during the winter," he said keeping his eyes away from us. "So, I wanted to keep him inside. I don't think he'd like to have been buried," My sister and I nodded with understanding. Dad slowly crouched down and drew your box of remains from the cabinet which was decorated with your picture and yoru favorite teddy bear with your collar around its neck. Dad held you in his arms, holding you with care. "There's some ash and bones and a few teeth," he said softly then gently pushing you back into your little cubby. Dad will never forget you, truely you were his best friend and a good family member to all of us. We all miss you and love you so very much. And I'm sorry I was mean to you when I was little, but I grew knowing no boundries of my endless love for you. I cannot express enough how deeply your absence has effected your family, but we all want you to know you're held tightly in our hearts and you are still alive when you are remembered, you were never forgotten. I love you, Jenica |
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| © Copyright 2004 Melodious_silence - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Ravenwolfvoyager Member
since 2003-12-25
Posts 326 |
Jen that was heartfelt. You bring sadness to the eyes in remembrance of Lackey's honor, but you reminded me of his love for all beings and his unselfishness. Except for the time he ate all of the Christmas Cookies Joel made! Thank you Jen, I couldn't think of a better heart felt tribute to give to him then the one you just wrote. Thank you. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Jenica~ What a lovely heartfelt remember~ WELCOME to Passions~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Wonderful way of sharing your friend, your love and feelings. Well done, my friend. Enjoyed the read. jwesley |
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