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Life Thoughts Part II
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Life Thoughts Part II |
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Ladycat 
since 1999-07-05
Posts 782At the edge and a doorway,TX 
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What makes a person who they are? Is it the life they live? I guess that is a factor, but if they are that way now then it has to stem from the past,right? Then it's their parents. No way is that always true. Look at my parent's life and then look at me. We look like we are from two completely different trees. I know personally a lot of it deals with the people I dated and the way that I was treated by the world. I know a never ending repeative story about the people that I made long term commitment life plans with and how really messed up I was after they left or after I left them. All in all, I guess it still stems back to ME.... I made me. I can't let anyone make me who I am. That seems rather stupid doesn't it. I have a mind of my own. Though I do have to say that love is blind, deaf, and dumb. I tell you to believe me there. I should know. Every stupid mistake made in relationships two people can look back and go this could have been done and this should have been done. Though nine thousand shoulda, coulda, wouldas later nothing gets solved. Yet, everyday and several more times through life we will waste our energies thinking about the past, but at the same time if we don't study the past then we are DOOMED to repeat it. What are we to do there? Then years later, here we are MADE.... All our own doing once again. Whether or not that truely made any sense is far beyond me, but I know that is one of the things that has helped me help myself. Love, Ladycat Live in my world just once and you'll find yourself enraptured. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Vynette M. Charles-Brooks - All Rights Reserved | |||
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Okay. There is a definite change of tone here....would be interesting to see "a bridge" of thought between the two moods--with perhaps even more added later that would illustrate the mindset of "mood swings" better. But all in all, I liked! Good luck Ladycat! (By the way, I have the same problem in maintaining tone. Sometimes I write TOO intensely and writing becomes an emotional marathon. So please don't assume that I know what the heck I'm talking about....sigh...and smiles to you!) |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Ladycat... if this entire novel is written like this, it will be put down. I have a suggestion. Many books that explore the character's inner mind and philosophy, as you are doing here, do so in intervals between events of the character's life. You could show the person riding a subway for example, analyzing all the faces she sees. Use of environment and surrounding events is a great way to keep the reader hooked and interested, as well as give more matter for the narrator to address. Keep it up... what you've written so far is of reasonably good quality. I just think you should mix it up some more. ~Allan "I know it's nice to be known - It caresses your ego - but the society cost is terrible." |
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Ladycat
since 1999-07-05
Posts 782At the edge and a doorway,TX |
Thank you both. That is great advise and I will get to working on an easy transition and more detail. I'm so glad that I'm a netpoet. Especially times when I get suggestions on what to do. Love, Ladycat Live in my world just once and you'll find yourself enraptured. |
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Solstice Son Member
since 2000-09-19
Posts 469 |
I like it...the introspective feel of both is good.....but I do wonder if these are whispered ramblings...journal entries...or maybe a nice confession session with a shrink...as any of those I find them interesting...but I do long to know what brought her to these points  Kepp writing Sol " The question shouldn't be...'Why are we here?' but rather 'ARE we here? " |
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