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Car Keys
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Car Keys |
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Sweeetsuz Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 770Fresno CA. |
I began my walk thru ineptitude and more government (local) red tape (bureaucracy) by driving to the nearby mountain community to get my middle daughter who was going to help me put Christmas lights on the house. We have several strings of purple and orange decorator type lights left over from Halloween and since they did not get used then we wanted to use them now and we are not stereotypical type folks anyway so.... My son went off to Erie Pennsylvania to have cheap tawdry sex (lucky guy) with some cyber sweetie, using his stated prejudices against using orange (they look red) and purple lights for Christmas, to get out of putting them around the roof. With my shoulders and my eldest daughters work schedule the middle girl was our only hope. My girls being much more like me than my son (small wonder that huh?) thought the left over Halloween lights a kewl idea so here we go... Now yesterday promised to be a baaaaaaddddddddd day anyway with the stress of I lost my car keys and my inability to sleep from worrying (silly). So I began my first day of winter break stressed!!!!! Upon returning to Fresno I told my daughter (Patti) to call the dealership nearest our house (Selma) and see what needed to be done to get a replacement key. The service department did not answer so I snarled to Patti to inform them that Fresno also had Chevrolet dealers and to hang up... We drove by the nearest dealership, where they told my daughter that...... all they needed was the VIN number and they could recreate the key and "On the road again!!!" I drove home and got started calling the dealer in Selma "again" only to discover that "Don" was not in and get even more angry. I had a very important Dr's appointment clear back across Fresno and needed to get the 2nd car back on the road NOW! NOW! NOW! I was forced to leave a message for "Don" and return to my living room still growling and snarling (mumble, mumble, mumble). I am unsure whether most people know of the chemical structure of the human brain, but my neurotransmitters were working double time trying to compensate for the lather I was working myself into. This process is incredible complex and yet the human brain handles it quite smoothly, but it does require fuel to work and this process being double time was burning up calories at an incredible rate so my blood sugar went to the basement, adding hunger and an intense headache to the equation (this is not an "I don't feel like it tonight headache," but full blown need a sugar fix headache, and not pretty when one is already angry and frustrated).. Patti grabbed the telephone and called Selma Chevrolet again and asked for the parts department and got one, Bill Barnes who said, " Do you have your registration, to prove that you own this car?" I replied, "No it is locked in the car." Selma Bill then asked, "How about an insurance paper saying that you are buying insurance, we only want to help you?" ?" I replied, "No it is locked in the car." "Well," says Selma Bill, do you have any paper work on the car at all?" I snarled at the Patti relay, "No! All the paperwork is locked in the glove box inside the locked car." "We," says Selma Bill, "are only trying to protect you from car thieves, we are only here to help you." The blond ravening, slavering, wild eyed, crazy woman shrieked to the Patti relay, tell the %^$#@*& that your sister is the registered owner and I will have her call you and FAX you her driver's license too... I grabbed the telephone and called my eldest (the registered owner) and told her of the dilemma and encouraged her to call Selma Bill, before I had a stroke, leaving her in pretty much the same mood as I was, while I began an angry prowl around the room trying to think how to prove to SB we owned or were buying the car. Denise, (eldest and car owner) was on the phone from work to SB presumably and who should call me but the Service department manager "Don." When I explained that I wanted to buy a key he asked if I could prove I owned the car and began a litany of paperwork that Selma Chevrolet would accept as proof of our right to get new key. I stopped him with my own of, "It's all locked in the car." The man then asked if I could FAX him a copy of my driver's license, as he did not yet know that I was not the "registered owner." I asked him where he thought I might access a FAX machine as it was also locked in the %$#^&* car!!!!! He then asked me where I was, to which I replied, “Home”. Don found no humor in this statement and asked again where that place might be located and I gave him the cross streets and he then suggested that I call a dealership in Fresno (trying to completely avoid the whole issue) adding to my fuel enraged fire. I then told "Don" in as terse terms as I could grunt out between my clenched teeth that his dealership was the closest to my home and the locked vehicle and NOT close to a FAX machine. He again told me that they were only there to help at which I must have audibly choked into the phone, "Then do help and make the ^%$#&* key." I told Don to call the DMV and they would tell him who the registered owner was and we could proceed from there, to which he replied that DMV would no longer release such private information, to anyone without authorization. I then climbed through the receiver grabbed Don by the throat and said, "So, we are supposed to just throw the car into the trash because the keys got lost?" "Ma'am," says Don, "We are only here to help you." To my credit and proof that I was not totally psychotic, I did not murder the man, but some disturbing pictures did run through my thoughts..."Ma'am," Don added thinking I was being reasonable and not just choking on my aplomb, "Someone could have stolen your purse and be getting your information from your wallet and trying to steal the car, also." I thought to myself that if this supposed thief took my purse, wanting the car, he probably would have stolen the keys too rather than go through all this stupidity with Don and SB, (who was still on the telephone with Denise, at this time). I being true to my own perverse self told Don, "If some idiot stole my purse to get the car he would no doubt be smart enough to steal the keys too, and will be here to get the car if you do not make me a key. He could also FAX you a copy of my driver's license and you would have no way of knowing it was me, anyway." Don was quiet long enough for me to get that he had not thought of this in his "what if scenario" which might work on kids but not on MAD blonds. I knew then if this man said to me one more time that Selma Chevrolet was only there to help me, I would drive there and find him and commit 1st degree murder. The proverbial "light bulb" turned on in my head and I said to Don, "We purchased an extended warranty from Chevrolet on the car, and I seriously doubt car thieves would do that, with my daughter's name and our address which is also printed on my driver's license and our joint checks. I know you can access that through the VIN number as we used it already and they did." Poor Don saw an out and said this would work and quickly slid out of my fevered verbal grasp and hung up. Denise called and said she had managed to get SB to agree to make us a key and it would be ready in a half hour, so I headed for the door only to veer that way via Denise's desk where I found right on the top pile, the payment booklet for the Chevy, with Denise's name and address and more importantly the VIN number right on the front. I raced for Selma Chevrolet waving SB's and my salvation. Upon arriving I found SB and he was not even interested in seeing my proof that we owned the vehicle and gave me and my key problem to one of his employees. I waited at the desk quietly while a younger man hurried and tried to get Chevy to hurry and transmit the code for the key, and he used some of the same neurotransmitters I had been, trying to hurry the process, while I looked at the clock and paced. SB came over and tried to get me to sit, but I replied I would wait and he bowed out leaving his youthful employee to deal with the problem (me).Finally the code came thru and the key was done and the nice young man told me to pay the cashier $55.03. Incredulous I paid the cashier and took my keys and headed home. I told Patti I was about half sick from hunger as the stress level dropped and hunger (burnt calories) hit with terrible force. I was excited to get home thinking (hoping) the old keys would appear and we would have two sets, which would be fine, and so I drove into the driveway and jumped out of the car and stuck the key in the door and .............it did not work....... of course. The young guy in Selma of course blamed Chevrolet for the wrong codes and this time believe it or not they (Chevrolet Corporate) called the house and asked if they could release the codes to Liberty Chevrolet in Selma, and did not even ask for the owner of the vehicle, so…..go figure.... Blessed be and merrily met with good thoughts and feelings to all |
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desperado Member
since 1999-05-24
Posts 312FT Hood,Tx |
*shakes head and puts face in hands* DEAR LORD, SOME ONE HELP THIS POOR WOMAN... hehehe *amused smile* Life smiles upon those who smile first I'm not sure if you really want a critique, but here goes. First of all, I'd remove the parenthesis. They pull away from said story and make it difficult for the reader to follow along with the daily events of your life. Secondly, the punctuation could be cleaned up just a touch. It helps keep the rhythm even when reading. Third, I'd change a few sentence structures around, for example, instread of "the stress of I lost my car keys", you could write, "with the stress of losing my car keys". just simple things like that really. it's often not the major things that keep people back when writting, but the little things. Loved your day, and I must admit, you did have a rather unique one. don't worry, just remember to smile and not get so stressed out. thanks for sharing. People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. --Soren Kierkegaard |
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Sweeetsuz Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 770Fresno CA. |
desperado; Thanks so much for the time and the caring which went into your comments and I will edit with your suggestions and repost thanks again Suzy Blessed be and merrily met with good thoughts and feelings to all |
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Sweeetsuz Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 770Fresno CA. |
desperado, I forgot, I always come to see the humor in such situations whis is why I wrote it up like this.... Blessed be and merrily met with good thoughts and feelings to all |
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