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Jeffrey Carter
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State of constant confusion!

0 posted 2000-07-29 02:29 AM


Okay Guys and Girls, Here is a different beginning to this story. Please let me know if this one is any better. I know it doesn't really have any of the action that will soon follow, but it is more or less the backbone of the charecter's story. I describes his intellegence. His playfulness, and his likeability. Mostly it establishes a love interest. I am working on the next installment of this piece, in fact it is almost finshed and ready be posted. I hope you all enjoy it.  


     I awoke to the voice of the morning drive time disk jockey barking out the statement
"If you are not already out the door you are really late!" I realized then that today was not
going to be one of my better days. I jumped out of bed and grabbed a quick cup of coffee
as I was getting dressed.
        I didn't notice the nickel-sized stain until I was almost out the door. I just happened to
glance up into the mirror my wife had hung on the wall in the foyer. It was an antique she
had found when we were vacationing in the vineyards of Southern California the year before.
Though every passing second put the future of my career in that much more jeapordy I
couldn't help but smile as I remembered the look in her eyes when she spotted that old mirror.
       Snapping out of my momentary trance I ran back upstairs and changed into a fresh, clean
shirt. Then bolted back down the steps and out the door. Slamming it hard behind me. Two
seconds later I heard it. The loud crash and glass shattering. I felt my heart jump into my
throat as I turned around slowly, hoping against all hope, that the sound I heard was one of the
oval shaped etched glass windows of the front door breaking. As I caught the glint of the door
I felt a great sense of relief as I saw my own pale reflection staring back at me. I pointed one
finger toward the sky and said, "I owe you one!"
        It was then that I saw my wife's smirky little grin. She knew what I was thinking and why I
looked so terrified.
        "I thought it was......"
        "The mirror" she finished my sentence for me. She had been able to do that since the day I
met her.
        She said "I'll call the repairman. You'd better get to work."
        I smiled, kissed her on the cheek and started towards my car.
        "Umm.....Sweetie?" She called from behind me.
        "You might want to take this with you." With that smirk, now grown into a full-fledged grin.
        "God, where is my head this morning?" I remarked as I took my briefcase from her outstretched hand.
        "What would you do without me?" She asked jokingly.
        "Evolve backwards! Back to being an ape for me!" I said through the wide smile now plastered
to my face.
        Two more kisses and an I love you later found me on the onramp to Interstate Eighty five. The first few miles of the eighteen mile drive is always slow due to the neverending construction that always keeps at least one of the three South bound lanes closed. So, it gives you time to think whiledriving. Which is exactly what I found myself doing this morning. I was lost in the memory of how I had met my wife of two years.
         Most people would say that finding love on the internet is not possible, but that is exactly how we met. I had been chatting on line for about six months with nothing more than finding a friend in mind when I saw her user nickname pop up in an instant message window.
        
        I don't remember the exact message she sent. In fact, I wasn't really impressed with her at first, butwe just kept bumping into each other in chat rooms and became friends. Soon we were meeting nightly. Neither of us looking for more than someone to listen to our problems. Someone to be a shoulder we could lean on. The more we talked the more we realized how much we have in common. We share a lot of the same beliefs. A lot of the same ideas of what life is all about, but the biggest thing we had in common was the fact that we were both very lonely.
         We were both married at the time. She for fifteen years. I for eight. Both of us had small children at the time. A total of five all together. Her two sons and a daughter and I two sons. Needless to say it was a very complicated situation. We would meet each other on line and share a dream of forever in each others arms. Longing to hold each other tightly as we kiss each others lips. We met nightly like that for six
or seven months before we decided to take the chance and make those dreams a reality. We decided to meet on a Saturday night in late June. She had to work that morning so I made the drive to Memphis, Tennessee, which is where she lived. It was an eight and a half hour drive from the small town I lived in in western North Carolina.

**************************************************

to be continued (of course)


[This message has been edited by Jeffrey Carter (edited 07-29-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Jeffrey D. Carter - All Rights Reserved
Erin
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since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
1 posted 2000-07-29 04:08 PM


i like this one better!!!
Jeffrey Carter
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2 posted 2000-07-29 11:43 PM


Thanks Erin, but is there any particular reason you like this better? I know it may sound like a dumb question but I am very new to writing "stories" so i need all the info I can get.

Thanks in advance

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 2000-07-30 01:47 AM


Ok..I've read them both. This one is the better one as you have more depth, more feeling in it..the small vignette about the mirror says a lot about both characters. I like it.
Jeffrey Carter
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4 posted 2000-07-30 05:34 AM


Thank you Sharon, A friend once told me to let the small stuff (the mirror) speak for the charecters and that was what I was attempting to do here. So glad you noticed

Although, the mirror may seem small to those whom it doesn't concern it is not at all small to the charecters I think.

Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
5 posted 2000-07-30 04:38 PM


i think that it would sound much better. it has alot more details then the other beginning has..
Jeffrey Carter
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6 posted 2000-07-30 05:19 PM


Erin, thanks for coming back and giving your thoughts, i really appreciate it
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