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What can love do? (Chris's challenge)
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What can love do? (Chris's challenge) |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697
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(Sorry, this is kinda long...) What can love do? Some day it can climb mountains, it can cross oceans, but I say it can make a shy, chubby freshman poet wannabe give one of her pieces to a handsome exchange student. Or maybe it was madness... sometimes I'm not sure. Well, I'm getting ahead of myself. The best place to start is the beginning. I was exited to be starting high school. Finally, we would get the respect we deserved (right...). My friends and I were standing outside, waiting for them to call us into assembly. We were having lots of fun, comparing summers and schedules, and wondering how badly we would get lost before the day was out. We really didn't have any fear. It's a small town, so we knew most of our fellow students already. Finally, they called us into the theater. Our new principal came onto the stage, telling what was expected of us, and introducing new staff members. Then he started on the football team. I groaned inwardly at this. Everything else in our school was like the planets, revolving around the sports sun. I wasn't really paying much attention until he introduced someone special. "This year, we are lucky to have an exchange student. Stand up, son" Ah... I couldn't forget that moment. Even after all that's happened, I could never forget that moment that he stood up. He was well-built and handsome, with sandy blond hair and beautiful blue eyes. I'll see those blue eyes until the day I die. I saw him, and I knew. I loved him. Yes, it was Romeo and Juliet all over again. Except that Romeo was a football player, and who was I? I was a brain. Yes, a brain. I knew at the very beginning that nothing was going to happen other than in my mind, but it was still exiting, looking into those beautiful blue eyes. The exitement of a new school faded fast. I told all my friends what I thought about him, and none of them agreed. "He talks funny!" one of them said. Ah, but the accent was one of my favorite things about him. I spent most of my days staring at him, listening to him talk, and just enjoying being in the same building. I thought I was going to faint when he walked into my art class, saying his schedule was changed. I was even more exited to find out that he was going to sit at MY table! And I would never forget the first time he talked to me. "Hey you there, you have dollar for me?" I gladly gave him all the money I had. He smiled at me (AHHH!) and said "Thank you very much, now I can eat!" That day at lunch, one of my friends asked "Why aren't you eating anything?" I glanced over at him and said "I gave my money away". She looked at me, shook her head and said "You got it bad". I certianly did. As the semester went on, he started to talk to me more and more, and not just to ask about money. We never got very close, but we had some good conversations. He told me about life in Europe, and how diffrent America was from Germany. I told him that my dream was to visit Paris, and he told me about his trip there. I loved to hear him talk, and I loved to look into his beautiful blue eyes. So, time passed swiftly, as it usually does, and it was soon the end of the semester. I was heartbroken that I wouldn't get to talk to him anymore, but I found out that he was going to take Spanish with me. He never talked to me as much in there, he always talked to another one of the jocks. But I still got to look at him, listen to his voice, and, most of all, dream. Dreams are all well and good, but that's all I've ever done. Dream. I've never really taken the reins in anything I've done, I've just dreamed. Dreaming, always dreaming. Never doing. I knew where this was going. He was going back to his country in June, and I would dream on until the day he left, and I would just keep on dreaming about what COULD HAVE happened. I would never know what could have happened. I knew deep down that it could never work. He was far too wonderful for the likes of me, but I couldn't just sit around and dream anymore. Ah, what love can do... I came here for support, first. I posted a plea for help, for someone to help me to find the perfect poem. Several people helped me, and gave me encouragement. I will owe those people until my dying day. I got the guts to print it out, with my name on it, and I slipped it into his locker. I thought I was going to puke or pass out one, but I delievered the message without incident. I only told one of my friends about it, a cheerleader who talked to him a lot. She said she would tell me if he said anything about it. That was the longest day of my life. Time flowed slower than molasses in January, but it was finally over. I approched my friend and asked her if she heard anything. She handed the poem back and shook her head. That was all she needed to do. I rode the bus home in a daze. I found my house empty, as usual. I knew that I had done the right thing. Now I knew, no more dreaming... but now, I missed those dreams. I missed them more than anything. Life went by in a blur after that. Broken hearts take a long time to mend. But, although I never completely got over it, I was able to life my life as before. Less dreaming, more mature, but still better than those dazed days after my rejection. Since then, I have learned that dreaming is a wonderful thing. It helps you cope with life, but it shouldn't become your life. I've never competely gotten over him. Whenever I look into those blue eyes, I know that I still love him, but I did what I had to do, and I'm not going to kid myself. If it's meant to be, it will be. If not, something better will come along. Sometimes, I regret what I did, but not very often anymore. I've grown up a lot since then, and I see things now for what they really are. What can love do? More than I ever imagined... "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde |
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| © Copyright 2000 Erica N. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Oh LoveBug what a wonderful story - life as a teen ---comes whooshing over me of the heartaches and the things we did. My goodness - you gave him your lunch money? --) I am glad you gave him the poem you wrote, regardless if it worked or not -- at least you got to go on with your life. Great Story - ~netswan |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Here is a secret (that everyone else can hear!) I did the exact same thing a few years back! Groooannn...but still...we are girls of action Lovebug! I think that was brave, and I am proud of you for doing it - and thanks for the read: It had a mixture of humour and tender moments that I really appreciated.  K |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
Netswan- Yes, I gave him my lunch money! Thank you for the complements.Severn- So I'm not the only crazy one! Thank you for your kind comments. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde |
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Ruby dagger Member
since 1999-08-01
Posts 76Wyoming, MN, U.S.A |
Good story, at least when you're old you can look back and say "I actually did it" instead of wondering what would have happened.good job. Luv Kelly "Everyone has to grow old, but it's a choice to grow up" -Vernon Lee- |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
LB this was EXCELLENT and NOT too long... somethings we JUST CANT be brief about *smile* this speaks to your strong character and positive outlook... that took a lot of guts girl... and you show a lot of maturity in the way you handled it and learned from it.. no regrets is such a healthy, positive way to look back. great writing take care, jm There are places inside our souls ... that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts ... that need to be loved this much. ~Janet Marie~ "What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly" ~Lao Tze Tao~ ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
I once had a similar experience. I still remember that boy, too. I don't know what became of him...guess I never will. Anyway, I really enjoyed reading this. You have great timing, and you made me feel as if I was there standing in the hallways of your school watching the whole drama unfold. |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Not too long... a story only need be as long as it takes to tell it. You told it well. I appreciate your care with the formatting, it always makes it much easier to read! Hugs for your strength lady. |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
I was never brave enough to even speak to the boy of my dreams! Just worshipped him from afar! I can still remember the way I felt whenever I passed him in the hallway... Great story! |
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