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kaile
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore

0 posted 2000-04-15 12:39 PM


    After a long day at work, Nancy Tan dragged her sore feet to the letterbox.Most of the day had been spent--and wasted--knocking on unappreciative housewives' doors and getting them rudely slammed in her face before she could squeeze in a word.The scorching sun, beating mercilessly upon the land, didn't help matters much either.
    She sorted out her mail for the day,sighing. A few brochures, notes from prospective buyers--perhaps she would call up an agent one of these days and determine the value of her shabby three-room flat, more bills--another heart-felt groan.Would they ever stop coming?, a few personal letters and finally a long brown enevlope marked "To The Parents of Keith Tan,class 1/4".
She took in the school crest lying majestically at the left hand corner and how the letter seemed to be bulkier than the rest.
    She suddenly felt a cold presence pressing on her til she couldn't breathe.Her puny legs suddenly gave way and she sank to the cold hard concrete, like a drooping flower whom had seen better days.


    Keith Tan opened the front door cautiously, even peering round the edge first though he was fairly certain his mother was out. Still, you couldn't be too sure.He reasoned.
    He stepped inside and let out the breath he had subconsciouly holding for a while. He sat on his favourite couch--never mind that it was falling apart in more places than not--and rested his legs on the crackled mirror table before him.
    He took out his cigarettes and had his first puff before he remembered with some guilt that he had promised his mother to quit smoking the other day.Colour flushed in his cheeks and he immediately stubbed the offending cigarette out. Good boy, he was.
    He sat back and reflected.It was getting harder and harder to find excuses these days.He recalled the last time he had insisted in giving her money.He had mentioned vaguely about winning the soccer bets with his classmates on whether France or Brazil would emerge victor.He even boasted, not without a tinge of pride that he always had a soft spot for France and that he always knew the French would not be a disappointment.
     His mother had looked suspicious--deep creases showed plainly on her wrinkled face,something that he was actually very familiar with.But she had reluctantly accepted the money,muttering a soft thank you,but not before admonishing him half-heartedly on the evils of gambling.
    He smiled wryly then.His mother had always been gullible.But a frown appeared on his boyish handsome face as he realised that he would have to find a more convincing excuse next time.
    He was so lost in his thoughts, he didn't realise he was puffing away.


    The rice was cooking.The kettle was boiling.The chicken wings--Keith's favourite--had been deep fried while the fish had been steamed.Searching around,finding nothing else to do,she finally wrapped her soapy rough hands on her apron and prepared herself for the inevitable.
    Her hands trembled slightly and her heart thumped wildly while she reached for the cursed letter. "Stop it,stop it,"she valiantly ommandered
herself."Don't be a bunch of nerves." But her gallant efforts were in vain as she found her hands trembling even more vigorously, as if they had a life of their own.
    She stared at the letter trance-like at first but deciding not to put off the unknown any longer,she tore open the envelope(rather savagely) until this typewritten letter stared at her.
    Dear Sir/Madam,it read, we wish to bring to your attention that your son,Keith Tan of class 1/4 has been missing from classes for a few months.Please bring your child down for a conference with the principal, Mr Rayson Tham on the following Monday(14/4/99) 10 am sharp at his office.
    Her jumbled mind registered nothing at first.Then a thousand queries floated around in her mind, screaming for her attention.Why had Keith been absent from school?Why,almost every night at dinner,he had rambled on excitedly about his adventures at school,the goals he had scored during breaks,the bonding he now shared with his new classmates... ...
    She felt a sickening tug at her churning stomach.Had he been lying to her again?Yet he had chatted so animatedly, his earnest face so full of zest and vigour... ...
    She bolted up,remembering.Recently,Keith had been giving her housekeeping money on a regular basis.Her presses on him as to where the money had come from had conceded nothing but vague replies of winning bets,friends repaying past debts and whatever not.Suppose he had mixed with his old gang of friends again.Suppose all that money had been the results of him stealing,robbing and extorting(and only god knows his other illegal deeds)just like the old days.
    Angry tears welled up in her eyes,which she didn't bother to wipe away.She was having a hard time trying to make things end,what with his father being killed in the car crash and falling sales due to the recession drastically affecting everyone's life.Why wouldn't Keith grow up and act more mature?
Why couldn't he take more initative in his studies?Did he really want to follow in her footsteps?She had stopped schooling at primary three and could only secure jobs that expoited her.Damn Keith,she would give him a good spanking when he returned home that night.
    Yet she felt worried and anxious.What was Keith up to this moment?Was he extorting money from kids reaching only up to his shoulders again?She remembered in dismay that the judge had warned her severely that her son had better hehave himself,this would be the last chance he would be given and the next time he was caught,he could jolly well spend some time in a Boys' Home.
    Please,Lord,she prayed frantically,let Keith come home safely today.Please give me a chance to guide him onto the right path.He already has a probation record to his name,please,please don't subject him to more.
    All these conflicting emotions dragged the helpless her down to this abyssal darkness.She could feel her vulnerable emotions swirling round and round in this whirlpool darkness til she felt close to dying.
    I really tried,God knows,i really tried.She thought unhappily about how she had tried to remain supportive and understanding while Keith had been caught previously for shop-lifting.How she had painstakingly encouraged him to drop his good-for-nothing hooligan friends, and start a new life afresh.
    Oh,Paul,oh what else should i do?Will Keith ever change?She appealed desperately to his picture on the altar,feeling actuely the deep void inside her.
    She broke down and cried unabashedly,the first time since Paul's death.

    "Good evening,Sir.Welcome to Kentucky Fried Chicken.How may I help you?" Keith smiled warmly and broadly at the next customer who had walked through the doors of the restaurant.

All Comments Appreciated.Kaile
    
  


[This message has been edited by kaile (edited 04-15-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
Dusk Treader
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 1187
St. Paul, MN
1 posted 2000-04-16 12:25 PM


This is a a great story, Kaile!  I love surprise endings, and this story lead you easily and seemlessly from the truth, until you show it at the end, very good!  Much enjoyed.  

 Abrahm Simons

"...Watching fate as it flows down the path we have chose" - Trent Reznor, "We're in this Together"

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
2 posted 2000-04-16 07:07 PM


Me too!

Wasn't expecting that!

Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
3 posted 2000-04-19 06:13 PM


I was prepared for the worst reading your story and was more than pleasantly surprised with the ending.   Well done !
kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
4 posted 2000-09-04 10:45 PM


thank you all for replying...that was my first story back then and i hope to get more comments before i venture out to write my second prose
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
5 posted 2000-09-05 04:38 AM


Great story kaile....

The ending was very exquisite...

one small comment: this would read much better if the paragraph breaks appeared with a line gap.

regards,
suhdir

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

6 posted 2000-09-29 08:56 PM


This is your first story?  This is really good, my interest was held from beginning to end.  Good to read

Kathleen



AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...
7 posted 2000-09-30 05:51 AM


Isn't it funny how you get to the end of some short stories and think "damn is that the end?" and yet you get to the end of some novels and think "thanks heavens, I thought is would never end".
This is definately an example of the former.

Very very well written, it kept your attention right to the end...I only wish it could have been longer.

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