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CMGrimm
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685
USA

0 posted 2000-02-15 03:16 AM


My New Beginning...

A long time ago, someone said to me "Everyday is like a new beginning." I was twelve at the time I think.  I never really understood what they meant, until now...

I used to work construction, building some of the finest homes in our community.  I had a great future ahead of me, nice car, new home, beautiful fiance.  Everything I ever wanted in life, everything I had ever worked for was mine for the taking.  I only had to keep it all together and it was mine.

I was working on the roof of the house placing builder's paper on the roof trying to dry the house in before breaking for the Christmas holidays.  A small breeze had began to blow and the air turned very cold.  The weather station had mentioned a possibility of snow and freezing rain that morning, but we...or rather I...decided to chance it anyway.  

By 10:00 AM the freezing rain had become more than mosst of my crew could handle and they waited on the gound for me to finish up so I could get them their checks and send them home.  Ice had begun to build up on the roof and it was beginning to get bery slick and dangerous.  I remember thinking that if I didn't hurry up things would get to slick and I might fall.

Then, just as I reached down to pick up the last of my tools to head across the rooftop to the ladder on the other side my foot hit an icy spot and I quickly was thrown down onto the steep roof surface.  

I remember the feeling of complete helplessness of not being in control of my descent. I remember thinking, about my friends, my family, and my life. I remember the feeling, all to clearly, of the jolt as my body slammed into the frozen earth below.  And I remember the faces, of all the guys that had grown to become my family, my best friends, My Crew.

In a couple of seconds they had me under a tarp with a portable heater to keep me warm adn to keep the shock away.  How in the world they knew what to do I may never know, but I'm grateful they did.  They called the paramedics, my parents, and my fiance, and by the time I got to the hospital they were already there waiting on me.  All my freinds and family.  I remember thinking, "I never realized I loved so many people"

A soft hand on my forehead...
A gentle kiss on the cheek...
A loving whisper...
A nervous laugh...

"I can't feel my feet" I remember saying.

"Don't worry about that right now hun...you will...your just cold." a strange voice was saying.

"OK maam, but I still can't feel my feet."

"Hush hun, just try to stay calm."

They pushed me into a cold room and started cutting all my clothes off me.

"That's a new shirt maam, please don't cut that."

"Sorry hun, I need to check your chest."

"But my mom bought me that."

"Sorry sir" a new voice said, "she has to do it."

I tried to stop them, but couldn't get my arms up.  I remember thinking they must still have me strapped to that stupid board.

"He could have some level of paralysis, maybe from the shoulders down."  I heard the strange voice say.
I tried to look around to see who was talking and who they were talking about.  I had thought the room was empty when I came in.

"I guess they brought someone in behind me.  Damn, I wish they would take this strap off my neck. I can't move with this thing on here."

A face appears over mine.   It's Renee's mom.  She kisses me gently on the forehead, a tear slides down her cheek, then the world disappears.

I can feel someone tickling my feet.
WAIT A MINUTE!!  I can FEEL someone tickling my feet!!  I open my eyes to see a young nurse looking up at me from the foot of my bed.  

"Can you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

She does it again.

"That?"

"Yes...I can."

She moves her fingers to the other foot.

"What about that?"

"No"

"No?" she asks.

"No" as a tear slides down my face.

"And I still don't hurt."

"That's ok hun...just get some sleep for now." and she disappears down the hall.


I wake up and the sun is lower.  I can see Renee standing at the window looking out.

"Hun," I whisper, "I'm sorry."

"SHHHH" she puts her fingers to my lips, "you didn't do anything."

"I know, but I'm sorry anyway."

"How do you feel?" she asks.

"I don't know, I haven't tried yet."

She laughs a little and moves over closer to the bed. I can see the wetness around her eyes, and can feel the wetness around mine.

"Don't cry please?"

"I won't" she promises.

"What time is it?"

"8:00AM"

"I slept all night?"

"With a little help" she smiles.

"OK..that's why I still don't hurt." I say.

"Yeah, hun, that's why you still don't hurt."
I can see in her eyes that she doesn't believe that.

A nurse walks in and switches on the lights.

"Morning hun,"  she is always so damn happy.

"Hi," I say, "I'd get up, but you know..."
she laughs, Renee sniffles, I just lay there.

"I need to get some vitals and stuff hun"
"OK"
My blood pressure is ok, my heart is fine, my brathing is a little hurried...
"COuld be from the pain" she tries to explain.
"What pain?" I ask. "I still don't feel it."
"Maybe the pain of not feeling it hun."
   bad joke.

"Do you need anything hun?" she asks.
"No" I say. ("Yes" I think..."yesterday to do over.")
The room disappears again.

The sun is blinding me.
"Can you shut the shades baby...please."
"OK"
A doctor comes in with a weird metal brace.
"Hi son." he says.
He smiles way too much.
I'm thinking, "That must be an awful expensive piece of aluminum you got there Doc."

"They tell me you want to try to walk with this" he says.
"I want to try to walk with anything Doc."
"Well then, just sit up for me."

I slide myself upright in bed, Renee helps to steady me as the doctor slides the brace around me and cinches it tight around my waist and lower back. I can feel my muscles spasming as he adjusts the tension.  
"I wish I still couldn't feel the pain" I grimace.
-No I don't really-

"OK son, lets give it a try." he says standing and staring at me proudly.
I try to slide off the bed, Renee has to help me.
I try to stand up, Renee has to help me.
I try to take a step forward. I fall. Renee can't help me, she walked outside, her love for me streaming from her eyes and down her precious rosy cheeks.
The good doc helps me to steady again.  I grab my IV pole and take a few steps out into the hall.
Everyone is watching...
The nurses smile and wave...
I try to wave back but it hurts too much...

"OK doc...that's enough for one day."
"Does it hurt son?"  he looks at me with big inquiring eyes.
"YES!!! REAL BAD!!"
"OK OK just take it easy for now, lets get you back into bed."

As I slide back into the comfort of the starched sheets and adjustable bed I remember thinking that learning to do this the first time wasn't near as hard as the second.

Christmas Eve.  A nurse comes in to wake me up.
"Hey hun, it's snowing outside." she pushes open the blinds, "you wanna see?"
I turn my body so she can help me get out of the bed.
"OK"
I grab my I.V. pole and work my way over to the nurses station. They are all laughing and smiling and listening to Christmas music on the radio. They stop and look at me as I come closer to them.

"How are you this morning?" one of them asks.
"Better than you," I say, "at least I don't have to work on Christmas Eve."
We laugh at that a second, one of them tells me I'm amazing, I'm thinking, " She's crazy"
Either way, we have a nice time for a few minutes, looking at the snow, listening to music, telling jokes and just talking.  For the first time, I start to feel like every thing is OK.

"Im getting a little restless maam." I say, "I'm going for a little walk."
"Well stay on this floor, and yell if you need us."
"OK, I will"

I ran into Renee as she was getting off the elevator.

"You look better today" she says.
"Thanks, I feel better," I look deep into her eyes and realize.
"God I love you"

"I love you too" she says.

And I knew then, that I really did.
And that everything really would be OK.

Looking back now over these last six years I have to acknowledge how far I've come, and how much I've grown. I've learned to appreciate the things that matter most. Good friends, Love, and Faith.
And I've learned to seek and search for those same values in the people I'm around, and to show others how important those values are in there lives.
"



© Copyright 2000 Christopher M. Grimm - All Rights Reserved
Dawn Eclipse
Senior Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 637
The Horsehead Nebula
1 posted 2000-02-15 05:30 PM


CM~~

Very lovely story, and it has a very good message in it too.  Good friends, love and faith are the most important things in life, and I am glad that someone took the time to write about them.  I look forward to reading more of your work

DAwn

Dusk Treader
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 1187
St. Paul, MN
2 posted 2000-02-15 05:31 PM


Wonderful recounting of a tale I'm assuming must be painful.  It was an interesting tale to read and the optimistic outlook at the end was touching.  There was a few mispelling's and misuses of homonyms, but all in all, great tale!

 A writer's soul is on paper etched.

In flames I shall not be consumed, but reborn. --
Abrahm Simons



Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
3 posted 2000-02-19 04:00 PM


  Few tales have the ability to tug at the strings of my heart... this on has done just that.

You've chosen the perfect venue to express what, as said above, I'm sure must even now bring pain. I used to work in construction, (for a few years as a roofer.) One time, I too fell due to the weather. Thankfully I wasnt injured so badly, but I think the thoughts you described as you were falling were about mine. It seemed as if time slowed down and I could think all the thoughts in the world.

I'm not going to give you benign platitudes, telling you to "hang in there," or what have you. Assuming this is a real story, then it is quite obvious that you have an amazing will and strength beyond my ken.

All in all, I must say that I am VERY impressed both with the manner and the actuallity of this telling. It brought chills to my spine and tears to my eyes. Live strong and be a good human!

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2000-02-19 04:21 PM


Pass the Kleenex! This is an incredible story..that it's true makes it even more so.. thank you for giving me some needed inspiration today... I hope all your days are full of love and hope.
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697

5 posted 2000-02-19 04:25 PM


This piece really touched me! Good job!

 "To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world"

Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
6 posted 2000-02-19 10:44 PM


Chris, this was an inspiring story. I am so glad that you were able to make the best of a bad situation. You saw what was important in life and you found strength and courage to do what had to be done. Well written and welocme to Prose. I do hope we see more of you here.  
CMGrimm
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685
USA
7 posted 2000-02-20 11:09 PM


Thanks everyone for the sweet replies...I honestly posted thinking no one would respond..LOL...Guess I was wrong on that one... Thanks for reading and for caring.
And Dusk Treader...I'll try to work on that..prose isn't one of my strong points. LOL..

Thanks all...

Chris.


 Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions. - ANON.

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