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May I have your opinions on this piece please?
| Passions in Prose |
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May I have your opinions on this piece please? |
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Terrina Kethryveris Member
since 1999-12-06
Posts 53USA 
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That headache again. Oh the pain, you’d think I’d be numb to it by now as many times as I have had this, but alas I am not. My friends all around me and I sit staring at the floor not moving, not talking. All I know is the pain that flows through my whole body; my head feels as if it will split wide open at any moment. Oh this blasted thing why won’t it leave me alone, why now? Not now any time but now! “Are you all right” I hear the low whisper of Kero’s voice in my ear. I tilt my head just enough so that I can see her. “I’ve got a headache,” I whisper back my head throbbing with every word I speak. She looks at him, the one who has made me think twice about my theory of love at first sight. “She’s got a headache. Got any ibuprofen?” He nods and walks to the kitchen followed by Kero. She’s my best friend and he is her stepbrother, I can’t help the way I feel about him but I hate the thought of dating my best friend’s brother, even if he is just her stepbrother. I know how she feels about it, we have talked and she understands hell she thinks I should go for it. Keeps telling me ‘go for it Hun. He will treat you right, and you deserve that. Even if it is only for sex.’ But I still don’t feel right about it. She knows him better than I do; maybe I should listen to her. I see a hand holding two pills out to me and I look up with all the pain and agony it causes me to see Kero handing me my ibuprofen and a glass of water. I take the two pills and down them with the water and then resume my former position, head down staring at the floor. It seems to help, just staring at the floor not moving not talking. I feel an arm around my shoulders and one under my legs and I am lifted from the couch. I look up into his eyes, “What are you doing?” I ask in a low voice. I receive no answer he just turns and walks down the hall with me. I look over his shoulder at Kero with questioning eyes and she just shrugs. He carries me into his bedroom, lays me on the bed and says, “It’s quieter in here and not as bright. You just rest and get feeling better, I know what it’s like to get headaches like that.” Then he turns and closes the door softly behind him. In the living room I could hear Kero and him talking. They were talking in low voices so as not to disturb me, but I have good ears when I want them or when my head is pounding as it is now. Their conversation consisted of why my head was hurting as it was and the fact that I have a messed up neck from a car accident I had been in a few years back. I rolled on to my side then and stared at the wall instead of the ceiling. God I wish the pain would stop. I look at the clock that is sitting on the bedside table, even the dull red glow of the numbers is enough to hurt my eyes at this point, 6 p.m. I close my eyes and try to concentrate on anything but the pain. What seems like a few minutes later I hear the door open, the pain seems to have subsided until I make the mistake of lifting my head to look over my shoulder at who has entered the room, insta-headache. I look back at the clock 7:30 I had fallen asleep. “Are you feeling any better?” Jayson ask. “Not really.” I reply in a low voice that is twinged with the pain I feel. “Kero said something about your neck being messed up, is that what this is from?” I nod slowly. “Do you think a massage would help it any?” He asked walking over to the edge of the bed. “I don’t know I haven’t ever had one when I had a migraine.” I had rolled onto my back again and was looking up at him. “Well it won’t hurt to try right?” he asked with a smile. “I doubt seriously it would hurt me any more than this headache does.” “In that case I’ll go get some lotion, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” he says as he walks out the door. I hated moving but I knew that I needed to remove my shirt so that he could actually give me massage. I have had so many professional massages done that I never even thought twice about what I was doing, just sat up took off my shirt and bra and turned over to lay on my stomach. Jayson returned with the lotion and sat beside me on the bed. He began to knead my shoulders and worked his way up the back of my neck. His hands were so soft and gentle that I could feel myself relaxing. He kept working away as I started to fall back asleep soon I was out. I woke, or sort of woke long enough to pull my shirt back on and the covers up over myself and then I was out again. The Dream I was lying in bed trying to fall asleep when I felt the edge of the bed move, I looked over my shoulder to find Jayson climbing in beside me. He lay down and wrapped his arms around. Some small voice in the back of my mind said that something was wrong with this picture, but I ignored it nothing felt wrong with it. I felt safe, warm, loved, protected, and I felt as if I had finally found the one place I belonged. I was as if my whole life I had been searching for this moment. To be lying here in this bed with this man with his arms wrapped around me, my body pressed to his. I didn’t care if it was in some way wrong, to me if felt more right than anything else I had ever known and I wanted to stay here forever. I woke the next morning to find that what I had thought to be a dream not a dream at all. Lying beside me was Jayson, his arms wrapped around my waist. When I tried to move he tightened his grip a little more and pulled me closer to him. My mind was racing, but my headache was gone. That same little voice I had heard in my dream last night was talking to me now, telling me to get up to move that this was not right at all. But what did it know? It had told me a lot and it had often been wrong. So I again choose to ignore it and laid back down, snuggled a little closer and fell back asleep. This may be wrong or it may be right, but only time will tell. And besides (given that Kero is right), I don’t think he could treat me any worse than I have been treated before. Truth be known, fantasy is much more appealing than reality. |
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| © Copyright 1999 Terrina Kethryveris - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
You held my attention from the beginning to the ending Terrina....This was very good writing! This is the first piece of yours that I've read and now I will be seeking out more of your work  A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire! Shannon |
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Dusk Treader
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 1187St. Paul, MN |
Interesting read, Terrina. Well written piece you have here. Much enjoyed from begining to end < !signature--> In flames I shall not be consumed, but reborn. [This message has been edited by Dusk Treader (edited 12-19-1999).] |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
Well done. Held my attention but it was over much too soon. There haas to be more to this story?? |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Hmm, I must say... if I may be so bold, (and I may! )That, if (you) are with a person simply because "I don’t think he could treat me any worse than I have been treated before." then perhaps (you) should not be with that person. In my not-so-humble, (thanx a lot Ali) opinion, EVERYONE deserves to be treated well. Be with someone because you think they will treat you well, not because youhope they won't treat you as bad. As for the rest, it IS well written and formatted. I had an easy time reading and it pulled me along, (though I thought I was getting a headache there for a moment! |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
It will be interesting to see, my friend, just where this story ends ... --Kess You cannot choose the way of your death, but the path you choose will determine its own end. |
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JennyLee Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461Northwestern, NJ. |
Hoping there will be more, as I enjoyed the read very much T  Words bloom like flowers that seem astonished at being born. L. Pirandello 16th Century Dramatist |
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