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Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada

0 posted 1999-10-04 07:59 PM


I thoughts often wander to the question why? Why is it the open, kind, compassionate hearts are the ones uesed and abused in our society? The ones that strive to give of themselves. The ones that hope to touch the lives of all whom they encounter. Even in the smallest of ways, just a smile and a compassionate look. They feel remorse for the slightest hurt they inflict and do everything in their power to heal. They give so completely of themselves, at times, lose themselves in others. These are the givers of our society.

On the other hand we have the takers. The ones that use for what they can receive without thought of the other. The selfish, inconsiderate abusers! They feel no remorse in the throwing out of the empty pitcher when they are through. Never once thinking of refilling. Unfortunately I married one of those, realizing that fact too late. They seem to be able to move on to another instantly. Making the abused feel that much more of a failure.

Over the last few years, as I have recovered my life. I have often wondered how he could find another to share his life with. Yet I am still alone. Then I realized that he does not share, he takes! He sucks the life blood from the soul and leaves all in his wake dead or badly wounded. In all of this, in the end I am blest. I survived, and have my children whom I adore. As well as a future, something I had lost while beaten and bleeding at his feet.

My hope now, my prayer, is to find one who can appreciate my soul and who can refill my heart.

© Copyright 1999 Marilyn - All Rights Reserved
DreamEvil
Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396

1 posted 1999-10-04 10:01 PM


Welcome to Passions in Prose!

Official greeting and all.

------------------
Now and forever my heart hears ~one voice~.
DreamEvil©


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
2 posted 1999-10-04 10:15 PM


Thankyou DeamEvil...the welcome is appreciated. 'She bows to the moderator'. I have seen some of your work. I hope to better my writing here.
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
3 posted 1999-10-04 10:29 PM


Welcome as well from me.
In response to betterment: GREAT! 'Tis my belief that the day we can learn no more is the day we die! And you have come to the right place!

Why?
Givers and takers: IMHO, for a healthy relationship, it must be a combination of the two. Compromise is ever the watchword in life. Look at it from a different perspective, he "gave" abuse, and you "took" it. I know that doesn't make it right, but we are responsible for our choices. I am proud that you chose to not take that abuse any longer, as well as stopped giving to him!

A heart felt piece with your ray of hope shining through!


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
4 posted 1999-10-04 10:48 PM


Christopher...I agree totally with what you said about choices. I also look at it from this perspective. I said "For better or worse." and I meant those words. I did everything in my power to try and make things better. I tried to get him to a therapst with me but he refused. I believe it takes two to make a relationship work but only one to make it bad. Love is sweet but a relationship takes work and nurturing.

Ok...enough of my thoughts rambling on...LOL.
I appreciate the welcome.

Dragoness
Senior Member
since 1999-08-07
Posts 513

5 posted 1999-10-05 08:49 AM


Good read.Good luck in your search...he's out there somewhere.

------------------
Set you heart free and your mind will follow.


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
6 posted 1999-10-06 11:57 PM


Dragoness...Hope reigns eternal. I am also well prepared to live without that "one". I will never settle for less then I deserve. My life is full and meaningful and for now that is enough.
Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida
7 posted 1999-10-07 12:39 PM


Marilyn, I can definately relate to this piece. And as I gaze up at the responses before mine, I realize anything I could say now would sound horribly trite. Well written, your strength shows. And welcome to Prose!
Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
8 posted 1999-10-07 01:47 AM


That is a cruel fate Marilyn. I am a woman so it's not the same, but I do see into your soul through your writings and I see what a special lady you are. Small comfort huh?
Let Passions fill your heart in the meantime (which I think you are already doing). It's my belief that there are parts of our soul, that no one ever really sees or understands.
I have another challenge for you, here in Prose write me a story about your greatest loss ever, be it a man, or losing someone to death or whatever. Just don't upset yourself doing it OK? Are we on?

------------------
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny, compared to what lies within us.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
9 posted 1999-10-07 02:56 PM


Satiate....Thankyou for your comments and I don't think you can be trite. I appreciate the welcome.

Isis....I accept your challenge. It isn't going to be an easy write so it might take a little time for me to complete it.

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
10 posted 1999-10-07 04:54 PM


This is very powerful, Marilyn. I am truly sorry that you endured such hardships but, through your writings, I can see that you are a warm, compassionate, caring woman with a truckload full of good qualities and you will not remain alone. I hope he's worthy of you.
RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
11 posted 1999-10-09 11:51 AM


I know your soul Marilyn.

RB

------------------
if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming.

Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
12 posted 1999-10-11 03:17 PM


Balladeer....I hope your words are true my friend. He has to be worthy or this poor scared child in me will be running the other direction on winged feet.


Robert B....I thankyou for that. There are few that know my soul.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
13 posted 1999-10-18 12:25 PM


Marilyn, I can really relate to this, I left an abuse marriage of 17 years 10 months ago. I have lived more in those past 10 months than ever in my marriage...hope does spring eternal
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
14 posted 1999-10-18 04:25 PM


hoot...Wow my friend...10 months. I am very happy that you decided to leave. I have been out of my marriage for 2 years. I have lived better then I have in 10 years. I am just starting to realize that there are men out there who are loving and respectful. We need to be careful in our search my friend yet ever hopeful.
ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
15 posted 2000-04-08 06:00 AM


Marilyn, I am really sorry that your ex didn't appreciate the wonderful woman that you are. I hope that you find some one who really does to spend the rest of your life with.

Love and hugs,
Lizzie


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