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Noob101
New Member
since 2009-04-01
Posts 3


0 posted 2009-04-01 09:09 PM



Hey, so I met this girl on vacation and fell in love with her.  I guess it was a fling, but she lived kinda close but didn't want to see me again.

I wanted to write her a poem since shes into that kind of stuff, like writing along other things.  Just wanted to know if you guys could help me since I'm not a good writer and don't want to make this a mushy poem.  I'll post up some ideas when I get the chance.

Thanks  

© Copyright 2009 Noob101 - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2009-04-01 09:57 PM


Hi, Noob.

Writing a poem is a serious process of heart.

What is it that you might like to tell her?

Start there,

and you'll have what you want.

Or, since you've begun here as an interested participant, just read, and remember: what you write is yours; what others write, is theirs. Do not copy someone else's work as yours.

But if you find something in the "love" connection that you like, contact the author/poet, and ask them if you can share it: then you can go to the icon that tells you about poetry e-cards....

and share away.

Just realize that you cannot make someone elses' words, your own.

Sunshine


Noob101
New Member
since 2009-04-01
Posts 3

2 posted 2009-04-02 12:50 PM


Hello, well this is what I got so far. Tell me what you think

The first time I saw you
My eyes were drawn to you
If I could go back in time
To be with you just one more time
You're voice sends tingles down my spine
Are you sure those are your real eyes?
Because I was mesmerized

Falling rain
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Member Elite
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois
3 posted 2009-04-07 11:21 AM


Noob, I wrote this 'cause I've had the asme thing happen. You can give this to her but I get credit like Sunshine said.


There was never a simple glance
for you already caught my eye
Like gravity taking control of me
Just answer my question, why?

Why is it that time won't allow
To turn back an hour or two
To bask in your presence
But if only you just knew

That this love for you is unconditional
That its honest, I swear
For my heart is on my sleeves
Leaving me open and bare

So close your eyes my love
Tell me something true
Is it me?
Because I surely love you...


-Zach

We all flirt with the tiniest notion of self-conclusion in one simple motion.  

Noob101
New Member
since 2009-04-01
Posts 3

4 posted 2009-04-16 08:18 PM


Thats pretty good man but its a bit to deep for my situation.  
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